Time does fly by, G, and I find it's going quicker the older I get. I think it's very hard when you've always worked very hard - not just in the physical sense of work (ie, what you get paid for) but also when you've had to work hard at coping with things that have happened and/or other people - that invisible work that's so draining and time consuming but doesn't really show anything tangible at the end. You get through it, and it might make you a better person (I don't think that's necessarily always the case, I feel I am more cynical and worn out because of it all) but it doesn't feel like there's a big achievement you can show off to everyone. And I think that's hard in our materially focused society. I struggle with knowing I've worked for thirty three years and if I sold everything I own I'd probably make a few hundred pounds. So I get where you're coming from. It is tough. And I think losing people makes us re-evaluate where we're at, even if we weren't that close to them, you know? xx