Signals that your therapist is a Narcissist?!

[Anastasia]

I have a psych. degree and used to hang out with a number of therapists.  My beau even was a Ph.D. and was in practice.  I can honestly say that so many of them are not only more crazy than my other friends--but just total narcissists and master manipulators (all in the name of "helping" YOU, of course).  
I even dated a nationally known and world renowned t.v. personality/famous author of self-help books within the last 10 years and, trust me, he had more problems than most of us.  Some realllllly deep kinks.  Not for me.  
Of course, there are some fine people in the field who do great work--but I am convinced that many therapists get into the work due to their own problems, are deeply manipulative, and, of course, they get to be always right to win every argument.  Most tiring.
Just my humble opiniong and 2 cents worth.

[write]

( as I see it ) the more successful and talented someone is the more we sensitive people have been taught to respect and work around that...it's this sub-culture of nurturing/ accepting which dupes us into being abused when our N stops being an eccentric source of talent and reveals themselves as the mass of angst and anger they truly are.


I was a social worker many years ago but only stayed in the field a couple of years before I was burned out and disillusionned.
I often said that the clients were less messed-up than the other people I worked with...honestly I could write a book ( and one day will ) with anecdotes from this time.

My partner was drawn to me because everyone said I was an exceptional talent...he enjoyed that attention to him my partner at first....if only I had known then that this would afford him unbelievable irritation through weaknesses of his own. Unfortunately I believed it was me being too egotistical, too big-headed, too self-obsessed...so I gave up all my ambitions;what a fool.

He got me to give up all my activities/ friends and do what he wanted, but unbelievably- I am extremely talented, and a chance opportunity showed this...that is what brought about his latest major offensive, to react or bring me to heel.

Even more ironic: he is totally fallen apart since my success is snowballing and I get more and more concrete praise and recognition.

Can I feel sorry for him?
No he's a jerk...if he wanted to he could change a lot of his behaviour through therapy.
He chooses not to, in a 'rot in hell' style.
Not my problem.

[Anastasia]

Whew...a good example of codependency costing too much above.

[Anonymous]

Living Consciously,

This therapist is extremely disturbed. Don't ever go back.

bunny

[Anonymous]

even if a therapist is not a narcissist or doesn't have other serious problems or failings- it is everyone's p rogative to heal themselves in the way that feels right. there are lots of different models for therapy or to explain social and psychological problems, and lots of frameworks for healing. But people tend to identify with particular 'camps' or solution. If after two or three sessions it doesn't feel right, look for someone/ something else.

Whether its religion, politics or therapy- there is no 'one true way', and everyone's is a personal journey.

[pp]

delete

[phoenix]

bye

[Karin]

Hi pp,
Reading your post made me wonder whether in fact she was trying to gain his confidence because the same sort of thing happened to me over here in WA. The psychologist we were seeing as a couple berated, discounted my opinion over my husbands and made me feel as though she was siding with him in one of our sessions. I, naturally, had a lot to say about that and didn't go back. From what I've read, treating narcissists is extremely difficult because the psych has to gain their confidence by identifying with them and in order to do that they have to become 'narcissistic' themselves. The difficulty in that then, means that anything the psych does then to modify the narcissists behaviour is a threat to that very trust that they've set up with them.
Just a thought.

[pp]

delete

[Anonymous]

pp,

That therapist sounds seriously disturbed. I'm glad you registered a complaint about her - she's dangerous!

bunny

[phoenix]

bye

[Anonymous]

Absolutely right Phoenix, and that's why narcissists are so hard to treat; the (good) shrinks are scared of them too and are aware of the effects they have on them personally.
Sounds like this one was just incompetent.
Karin.