Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Update from.....Izzy
Twoapenny:
Izzy I hope it's over soon so that you can do some nice things and enjoy yourself. What a situation. So complex and so difficult for you. ((((((Izzy))))))
Izzy_*now*:
Ya folks.
Defendants admit guilt then want to get away with as little as possible, while the specialists I have for my case make recommendations (i.e. $$ for me to spend to best approach the damage done.)
-- Therapy for leg, now in a pool and learn to do it on my own--- (whine! I don't want to!...but I have to!!)
---Medications
---Choices to take will arrive when dentist submits his assessment and report--- might choose to have them pulled and be gumming it in Court! heh heh heh
---Have had to change most of my life style, even to wearing skirts instead of slacks. (pulling my butt across velour seats of car pull my slacks down and I cannot get them back up but thank heavens the chair hides the fact that I have returned sitting on my waist band....skirts are better, therefore, more wardrobe expenses. (Don't You Laugh! At Me!) i was out the other day in slacks and came back in good shape for the first time---
--- will try my left snow boot for the first time this week. I need my hip to shove in my foot when I pull it up with both hands--- no Hip now to shove back---HMMMM!! It's my right hip that run the accelerator.
I hardly remember my others lives!
Reincarnated under my very own eyes!
xxoo
Izzy
PS. 2 years this week, 17th, since I stopped smoking after 54 years of "being cool".....
lighter:
I'm picturing 1950's Izzy, red lipstick, and beehive updoo, with her ciggy....
you do look cool.
::nodding::
Lighter
Izzy_*now*:
You want I should attach a black and white of me back then, and you cannot see the RED lipstick I never wore?
I saw my orthopaedic surgeon yesterday for a look at a new x-ray of my "hip/thigh" and it was quite interesting in comparison to the one taken 3 years ago, November 12, 2009. The latter was messy, the new one is all clean and it appears that the femoral shaft might have attached a corner of itself to the acetabulum (hip socket) (but wouldn't that be a fixed leg?) as well as it shows all the scar tissue attached and that is what is allowing me to put weight (not full weight) on my left leg while swinging my right one in the air and hold onto the kitchen cabinet. ...... Never without Karla though!
I needed to know what it looked like just for the fact that we are approaching the "end", whatever way it goes, and I wouldn't be talking in a 'guessing style" which I would have been re the appearance and placement of the bone shaft.
I have been having "odd" email answers from my one sister who emails, plus a friend, who was once the D's sitter, had her 70th birthday yesterday and I telephoned as always, every year, as she does for me, but this call was different.
This was a little hard to decipher, but I had to "defend" myself 4-5 times with C. once was when I described about how I got into the bathtub (i.e oh God I wouldn't bother bathing) another the car (why not use taxis), another the psychogenic tremors, another about the length of my hair, another about the trip via plane for the examination.
I was becoming very upset, as she was saying if the tremors were in my head then just reverse the thought and they would be gone....that if an orthopaedic surgeon came here it would cost so much more so I might as well just go there (omg!), that the picture I sent of my long hair made a quibble over the words, "cut" and "trim".
This is what this sister does to me. When I scalded my leg with hot soup, Sis says 'I know how much it hurt, so watch out for infections, yada yada'..... and the next email, after I said I knew what to do, that I wasn't a virgin at this, she said she never had a scalding burn --- so what the hell is with everyone telling me what to do?
I suppose the best way to say it is to not criticize if you haven't experienced the exact same! Oh I know a good saying.. I made it up myself,
"Don't not walk in my shoes since I cannot walk in them either." HUH?????
I sent as gracious as possible emails to each of them, tonight, and asked why each felt that she had to tell me how to handle things????????
They don't disike me, I know. Is this sloppy way their way to help, but I am not 10 years old, and each has not been disabled for 43 years. They couldn't be jealous! WTF????
Pardon my ending!!
Love
Izzy
See? no red lipstick! I grew up in black and white,
1.) I was 15
3.) I was 19
2.) I was elderly like in the past few years---still no red lipstick but "big hair"?
4.) My 60th birthday and big hair
Twoapenny:
Izzy you are beautiful :) Then and now :)
Re the 'advice' - I often get this regarding my son, a sort of disbelief that his problems are as difficult and severe as they are, suggestions about where I'm going wrong, although never an offer to help or taken it upon themselves to do what they suggest personally (ie you get your sweet arse over here and get him to eat carrots if it's as easy as you claim).
I've come to the conclusion that it stems from people who are unable to just be supportive - to offer sympathy, understanding, to simply offer their condolences or good wishes for better things in the future. People who aren't comfortable with feelings and emotions and who blame others for the problems that they experience - perhaps so they don't have to offer support in any way if they can tell themselves it's the fault of the person experiencing the problem and if they changed themselves the problem would disappear.
I've had good advice from people in the past, usually from those who have been through a similar experience or know someone who has. I find people with no personal experience of what you are going through (bizarrely often the doctors and specialists who tell you what to do) often have little to offer in terms of good advice or sound information, particularly with conditions like yours that don't seem to fit a basic identify, medicate, cure pattern. Someone I know had this little gem at the ready when offered unwelcome or unhelpful 'advice' regarding her son's disability: "I've read dozens of books on this subject. I've scoured hundreds of pages of information on the internet, spoken to dozens of parents, attended numerous medical assessments, not to mention spending thousands of hours with my son and knowing him back to front and inside out. Why then, having spent ten minutes with him, do you presume to know more than me?"
I've always really identified with what she said and it rang so true for me as I was constantly questioned and presumed to be lying about my little boy. She really hit the nail on the head.
I'd like to add that I don't include the advice I get on here in the 'useless' category, quite the opposite, it's always been a real help and given me things to think about and new things to try out.
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