Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Won attorney fees in custody trial
fraidycat:
Congratulations on your win Lighter! It looks like people are seeing through their farce, I hope it ends soon and ends well for you and your family.
Fraidy
lighter:
OK, I feel gratitude now, and less demoralized, though it's not entirely gone I must admit. Not knowing when it ends is the hardest part at this point I think.
I hired my old stellar attorney to handle what he can with regard to remaining legal matters, and feel more in control, less at the mercy of the pd's and court system. No more dropped balls from here on out. All I can do is be as proactive and prepared as I possibly can, and that's it.
The tide is certainly changing in my favor, and I suppose my new motto must be "Better late than never."
Simply not fighting wasn't an option.
Not making it to the point where the worm turned would have been......
I have no words to describe that scenario, so I won't try.
Hops.... I'm sorry your struggle with your brother spilled into your relationship with dd..... there's just no protecting everyone completely, and we do the best we can. I know you did your best. You're Hops.
Tupp, the rules were written for people who follow rules, not for the rule breakers. Very frustrating. Terrible to be jerked around by pd's accusing us convincingly of what they're doing to us. Egregious and I must agree with Amber...... karma comes around, and it lands on everyone's head :x. Ok, the part about landing on heads is mine.... I'm paraphrasing.
How is your situation with holding your mother liable, and the agency and asshat who helped your mother harm you and your ds? Is that over? What happened?
Fraidy:
Thank you for your good wishes. I have faith all will be well, and even if things aren't OK.....
it's going to be OK.
Lighter
Twoapenny:
Hi Lighter,
My situation is on a back burner at the minute; I've sort of done what I can for now and am waiting for other people. I've put a lot of thought into it and I feel like they can still take up too much of my time and energy from this 'old' stuff. I'm 40 this year and it's a real turning point. My life up to now has been them, them, them. From here on in I want it to be me and my boy, my friends, my work, hobbies, life, you know? So there's plan a, b and c - a is the lawyers deal with it all, b is I accept there's no case and just send necessary amendments to various agencies so the records are accurate and walk away from it and c is that I've heard on the grapevine that my mum is very ill so she might die and make everything else unnecessary.
I think our situation is different to yours as my mum tried to obliquely get my boy rather than trying for custody, if you see what I mean. So yep, it's kind of out of my hands now and I will accept whatever the Universe decides is best.
I'm glad you're feeling a bit less demoralised but yep, I can understand how draining, frustrating and ultimately just how unnecessary all this has been - a battle that didn't need to be fought and that should never have been able to get to the stage it did. It's harrassment, pure and simple, and there should be protection from it.
So I hope the Universe smiles down on you, wraps all of this up and send a lightening bolt to put those people out of action for good. Lots of love xxx
lighter:
Tupp:
Do what you can, and that's all you can do.
It may be time to check in with the people you're waiting on.
Sometimes the squeaky wheel gets the oil. People in positions of authority tend to do things that need doing NOW, and the other things get pushed to the back of the line.
The sooner this is over, the better. Perhaps it's time for a very firm check in. Case or no case, you need answers and the answers will be what they will be.
Making peace with that seems like something you're already on top of, but.....
it's time for you to have answers, IME.
Here malicious abuse of the legal system in order to intentionally inflict emotional harm is a statute that must be filed at a certain time, during a case in order to have access to it. What do your statutes say about those kinds of cases? It's almost like the social services systems were used against you...... if there's no recourse for abusing it, harming people egregiously while utilizing it, then there should be. Perhaps your mother won't be able to use it again, but the person in that system who made it possible for her to do so is still there. Still able to harm other people. I should think it would be difficult to turn your mind away from holding them accountable and taking their authority over the most vulnerable in society would be something that keeps you up at night.
It certainly is one of the things keeping my attention, so I do what I can which won't include lawsuits, but rather filing complaints (with teeth) to licensing boards and Judicial Qualifications Boards, and doing it the very best I can. I want them out of the jobs where they're doing so much harm, but it's not up to me.
At this point it looks like the pd's have completely covered arses.....
::shrug::
OK. I can live with that. Chances are they'll lash out using the system again, and I won't drop any balls when that happens. I'll have a case so well prepared......
I'll be listed as Defendant again, but I'll end up being the Plaintiff, and what does that mean?
To be on the.....
Offensive. Able to contain the damage and inflict some of my own, to the right degree, on the right people, for the right reasons with the added benefit of putting an end to it once and for all.
Perhaps it's a cycle, and we're almost at the end, Tupp?
::nodding::
I know this..... if simply crawling free of the wreckage, chaos, crisis and manufactured confusion is all we accomplish.....
it's enough.
It'll have to be.
Give your little man a hug for me, and keep moving toward the exit door.
(((Tupp)))
Lighter
ps
Twoapenny:
Hi Lighter,
Your post was very prophetic! The legal stuff for us falls into three different camps and I got a definite no back from one this morning. Will chase up the others. Feel kind of relieved in a way, like I can just let it go?
Complaints were made at the time, upheld and no action taken against the people involved. The state system in the UK is very corrupt and whitewashing is always the most important thing. Social services have a particularly bad reputation, as do the police. It's all about numbers and targets so they drop cases they can't win and write them up as non-crimes and children's services go for easy targets (like single mums with health problems) and leave big scary child abusers alone (not all of them, obviously, but far too many for the system to be considered just and appropriate). So yep, heading for the door now.
Will pass on the hug! One for you and your girls as well ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Lighter and girls )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
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