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any savvy dogsters here?

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sKePTiKal:
Hi Hopsie:

I'm so glad you found a buddy!

Yes, I'm familiar with this behavior. My old "buddy" has bitten several people - including me. We know it was abuse from before we untied him from the tree we found him under. It's not even a herding, protective response. The groomer won't work with him, because she won't muzzle him and he bit her. So I muzzle him and "work with him" - i.e., not force him to do anything he obvious REALLY doesn't want to. Makes for funny hair cuts!

He is unpredictable about the biting. I have actually seen like a switch get flipped - in his eyes and demeanor - and watched happy, huggy, waggy Raleigh get replaced with Cujo. In an instant. This is a huge, huge problem when company is here - especially the little people company who aren't able to follow rules like: don't wave your sandwich around and get it near the dog. The dog gets separated a lot - and since he IS really social and he just loves people and is protective of the little ones - he doesn't understand and feels left out. But I can't take the chance that he would flip his switch and bite someone else.

The vet has tried paxil - to calm him down, but really that was just a temporary brain reset. Mike & I take turns "herding" him - letting him know he's safe and we want him around, too. Sometimes, half a dramamine helps, too. But Raleigh's about 60-70 lbs; those dosages need to adjust. We have all the other old-age issues too, along with a life-long recurring ear infection. SIGH.... he'll be 13 next month; quite the old man for either Cocker/Golden Retriever... and he's a mix of both. The biting has gotten worse, as his physical condition has declined... something to think about for the future. We had been able to trust him with the babies in the family, when he was younger. They climbed all over him.

Hopalong:
Dang. I hear y'all. She's still on probation, but I really am going to work
with her for a few months and see what happens. Before the Big Decision.

So far, I have noticed that with my gentlest-natured friends, she's doing fine.
Comes over and with one, just sat there and soaked up lots of petting.

Perhaps it's true that you can rebuild a fearful dog's confidence, after a long bad time.
I sure hope so. But I'll take the trainers' advice to heart, as well, and balance it
with my own limitations.

Because our evenings are ridiculously blissful. This critter CRAVES affection
and once I sit on the floor with her, it's an amazing cuddle.

You'll think I'm ridiculous but I swear there's a lot of communication. Most
of the time I keep it upbeat and a little goofy, and we do things cheerfully.
But last night after a lot of tickles and such, I paused, rubbed her belly with
its distended teats, and just looking into her eyes, said or "thought" (can't
remember) to her: I know you had puppies, and I am very sorry that you
lost them. I said it like...serious compassion.

She stilled, looked at me seriously back, sighed, then licked my hand.
(And she's not a licker.)

Sure felt like a two-way exchange of something deep to me...

Then we're back to bouncing around and happy together stuff.

xo
Hops

BonesMS:
The fur-baby knows....she knows.  No such thing as a dumb animal.

sKePTiKal:
Well, Hops... I wasn't trying to dissuade you; more pointing out what it could be like if she doesn't reform over time. It's do-able, if you remember that your new friend has "been there, done that" too -- and may have reasons for acting less than friendly that you can't know.

Raleigh's just fine with one stranger at a time. When it's a group of people, he does get overwhelmed, over-excited and it's simply too much for one dog to keep track of at once. I kinda know that place, too. LOL... that's why I'm always close to the edges of those scenes, and not smack dab in the middle, myself.

M has always said, that our dog is a total empath; he reads my emotional state and experiences it himself. (I used to think this was a way of trying to stick the blame on me, for the dog... rather, it's simply a reminder to check on self-awareness of my own state.) He's always been a friendly, waggy, social dog - with almost everyone. Freakily enough: it's A - my D - that makes the fur stand up on his back. And he growls when they arrive, instead of the happy, "company's here" bark he saves for everyone else - including UPS and the FedEx lady that brings him treats.

Hopalong:
Hmmm, that.
I bet my pooch would growl at my D as well (should she ever turn up).
I just sent her a laptop since I'd read on her blog that she needed one.
Should've known better. Furious, nasty texts about me "stalking" etc.
So I am now no longer trying to "keep the door open." She wants
absolutely nothing from me or to do with me, but also texted that
she would be in touch with me when she felt like it. So, there's
that. Once I got over it I realized I am re-calming much quicker.
She couldn't have spelled it out more clearly, so I cancelled the
laptop (I had texted her to watch for the pkg). And I guess I'll
stop paying her cell phone every month too. Been doing that in
cash at the kiosk for two years. But if this person won't call me
and wants nothing, I think that should stop now too.

It's sad because she's unwell, unemployed and needs help.
It's just that she doesn't want it from me. And I accept it.

Anyway, back to pooch.

Encouraging visit from the behaviorist who gave me a lot of
tips and thinks sh'es not inevitably a lost cause. I will work with
her for a month or two to retrain her to look to me for direction
and not be in charge herself, keep her controlled when visitors
come, and reward her for the usual obedience things. She's a
smart little pooch and I think she'd like to be happy so I'm not
giving up yet. She needs lots of new experiences in the world
where she learns most people are good, I will keep her safe, and
going out and interacting is fun. The behaviorist reminded me
that the trauma she's been through may have been extreme.

All in all, given that, I think she's a cupcake. And I am discovering
I can direct and guide her without some faux-ferocious dominant
act, which isn't natural to me. Mostly, cheerfully redirecting her
attention and training her to always look to me for leadership,
seems to be the idea. No nonsense and not anxious does it best.

Wish us luck, it's a happy project. She did great on a challenging
long walk this morning, with scary dogs and strangers running
and a big roaring schoolbus. Just praised her lots and we kept on
going. Now she'll sleep all day long and not be stressed.

Hops

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