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My Wife
mudpuppy:
Just read about a study of people in grief and some were largely over the grief in a month some in 6, some in a year and some never.
The one thing above all I learned in going through all this is, one size fits no one and what is right for one person is disastrous for another.
For some people the best healing is someone new to love. For others they'll never love anyone else again.
Some people ball up in a cave; others go every place they can.
Like a hot stove, the person going through it usually knows what hurts to touch and what doesn't.
No criticism intended of anyone; only that except for that initial pain when you can't usually function well enough to hurt yourself anyway, grief doesn't really take your common sense away; it just hurts.
If a person becomes clinically depressed for an extended period or can't get over the magical thinking then they need an intervention. For the rest of us it's just like the rest of life; you make mistakes, you make good decisions, you just do it all a lot sadder for some indeterminate period that we seem have little control over.
mud
sea storm:
Wise words Mudpuppy.
Blessings to you. Good to hear from you.
Sea Storm
sea storm:
Sometimes it seems like we are all in a big trance that is lead by science. In the olden days women would become budhist nuns and feel the grief for the rest of their lives and do a walking chant to alleviate the pain of loss. In Wuthering Heights there was that monster love that captures a person completely. Just like some people don't cheat on their spouses because they love them more each year and don't throw them away like a used car.
I find it hard to find love and it just does not happen.Other things fill my life. Other kinds of love that are very rich. I think its good for me.
I told my realtor that maybe I need to find a husband as they are so handy and he said,
Oh Jeez then your troubles have really begun.
He is pretty smart so it reinforces my belief that I need to learn to be happy by myself in this lifetime. I didn't think I could do it but I am getting their.
Hopalong:
So (((((((((((((Mud)))))))))))...
are husbands really handy or is that a myth?
Can one discover this with third husband?
Wanna be my third husband in a year or so?
Irreverently,
Hops
Hopalong:
Dear Mud,
This is worth every word even though long...because of the end.
(No skipping ahead!)
http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2014/02/17/140217fa_fact_angell?currentPage=all&src=longreads
Hope it comforts,
Hops
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