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Still need to work through early trauma

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Gaining Strength:
Today, I am going to be present to my shame, name it, acknowledge it, be aware of it, talk to it and most critically do work in its presence.  If I am able to work in its presence I will be on my way to a major healing level.

Gaining Strength:
I am excited about this.  It is feeling very nice. Fingers crossed.

Gaining Strength:
So at EMDR yesterday, we focused on a childhood memory which has all the ingredients of my stuck endless.  For the first time I saw something critical.  I had been sent away from the family watching Disney together because I cried at a sad part.  I was supposed to go to my room but instead I went to the hallway where I wasn't seen but could still be attached. 

For the first time in memory I am able to work in spite of the pain.  Fingers crossed for this being a Rubicon.

Gaining Strength:
After all of these years there is habit, fear and anticipation all built in to the withdrawal.  According to lore, it takes 40 days or 6 weeks to break a habit.  I'm definitely up for it.  The first thing I can finally do is make a list, (a SHORT list) of things I want to accomplish in a day.  That will help keep me focused.  There is so much to do. Otherwise I can get totally lost in what to do next.

Gaining Strength:
Going to start generating a schedule. Top of the list is time for visualizing my life desired.

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