Therapy by text message?

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

Hi everybody,

Therapy by text message was bound to appear sooner or later (after all, lacking business here, the psychoanalysis community has exported on-the-virtual-couch therapy to China via Skype):

http://www.talkspace.com

And here’s an article about it:

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/disrupting-psychology--does--25-week--text--therapy-with-an-online-shrink-work-133715375.html

I’m not sure whether to be  ,   , or  

Richard

[Hopalong]

Tell you what.
How about you practice on ME and then see how it feels?

I VOLUNTEER!

 

Hops

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

Tell you what.
How about you practice on ME and then see how it feels?

 

Hops

ok Hops  whats goin on?  how are u fealing today? 

R.

[Twoapenny]

Gosh, it wouldn't have suited me!  I got so much out of carving out a space for myself once a week for an hour and having actual face to face contact with another human being.  Both the therapists I saw were female which was really good for me given all my 'mother' issues as they gave me much stronger, more positive role models than the one I had grown up with.  One in particular, who was the same age as my mum, used to walk me to the door at the end of the session and give me a little pat on the shoulder as I left.  It was a really motherly thing to do and I appreciated it so much.  They also both used to make sure I was comfortable during the session - make sure I was sitting comfortably, get me a glass of water, hand me tissues if I needed them.  Those little comforting gestures made as much difference as the talking did, I think.

So therapy by text - I suppose it would be better than no therapy if that was the option - in the same way that junk food is better than no food at all?  And I guess as the world changes more and more people have relationships with their machines than they do with other people and this might be the way that more and more people go.  I'd worry that it's potentially dangerous?  If you can't see how someone is reacting physically your words might be too strong for them?  That's quite a difficult balance to get right in therapy.  Mmmm.  Not for me.  I'm interested in seeing how this text speak conversation between Hops and Dr G progresses, though

[Hopalong]

Oh. You mean we gotta do it HERE?
 

You mean Group Text Therapy?

Hops

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

LOL!  OK then.  U can be the therapist and I’ll be the patient.  I always luv it when my patients say they are now emotionally healthier than I, so now it’s time to switch roles.

+ I know u’d make a great therapist, Hops!

R.

[sunblue]

Hmmm. Oh okay. If I can't get therapy texting how about "T Doc on Demand" via smartphone app of course!! Or maybe FaceTime!! 😊

[lighter]

I don't know......

I think I would have gotten as much out of texting, maybe more, with  a T I really liked and trusted.

It wouldn't have worked with a stranger, IMO, and in one way it would have improved the sessions where I saw T's look stricken bc they felt helpless, unable to provide answers, and frightened for me, which left me feeling worse.   Text would have removed that aspect.  Also, I could have revisited the session as needed.

How do you feel about skype and phone sessions, Doc?

Lighter

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

Hi lighter,

I do phone/Skype sessions with long-term patients who have moved out of town.  They know me as a person and can imagine sitting in the office with me both during sessions and between sessions.  My presence is already in their brain wiring, as is theirs in mine.  I have also had sessions with my patients while either they and/or I were on vacation.  I have never begun therapy with anyone via phone/Skype—although I did, long ago, say to one or two people:  “If you want to come to see me in Brookline for a few consecutive one-a-day sessions, we can consider whether phone therapy would work.” 

As I’ve said many times, the most important factor in choosing a therapist is who the therapist is as a human being.  Personally, I would rather work with a therapist via phone or Skype if they were the “right kind” of human being, than one, in person, who wasn’t.  And sadly, for me as a patient, the right kind of human being was impossible to find in the Boston area—and working/teaching at Massachusetts General Hospital/Harvard Medical School and elsewhere, I met plenty!   So, to sum it up, yes, phone/Skype would be good enough if the “right kind” of human being were on the other end of the “line.”

Richard

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

Hi tt,

Welcome back!  I’m so sorry to hear about your health issues! 

Unfortunately, I don’t understand your question, perhaps because I wasn’t specific enough.   If a person is searching for another special human being with important qualities—intelligence (emotional and otherwise), empathy, caring, openness, authenticity, freedom from dogma, etc., etc., in order to make them feel less alone in the world, who is going to persecute her/him for political incorrectness?  Please say more so I can understand…

But, most importantly, take care, and if there’s any way the Board can help with the health issues by lending an ear…(You’ve certainly heard about my health issues and helped me!)


Richard

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

Hi tt,

Forgive me for butting in, but in 2015 how on Earth could you determine the  "right kind" of person without being persecuted for political incorrectness?

Actually, my big concern about your post was that, knowing you for so many years, it didn’t seem like your “voice.”   The particular words from “butting in” on to the end of that sentence were not ones that I could imagine you writing. 

There is no question in my mind that there are different “kinds” of people.  For example, people with a Narcissistic Personality Disorder (or any other personality disorder) qualify, IMO, as a "kind", because the personality disorder affects so much of their life and so many of their relationships.    But, in my experience there are wonderful “kinds” as well—a person who fits the qualities I write of above would be one such kind.   Anyone want to create a DSM of wonderful "kinds" of people?!!!

I had never thought about having a Forrest Gump or Chauncy Gardner type for a therapist.  Maybe ignorance can not only be bliss, but goodness/unselfishness, too!  (Well, actually, I would need the intelligence [emotional and otherwise] dimension in a therapist as well, so unfortunately neither Forrest nor Chauncy would work.  I’ll keep looking...)

Richard

[lighter]

Hi teartracks:

Good to see you back.  Are you feeling better now?

Lighter

[Dr. Richard Grossman]

"I haven't figured out why my post seemed so unlike me. If memory serves me right, it is pretty common for members to apologize for butting in, changing the subject on threads etc.  Maybe I never did any of that?  I don't know.  I would be interested to learn why what and how I said it seemed so out of place for me.  You wouldn't be thinking that I've turned itelligent (emotional and otherwise), empathetic, caring, open, authentic, free from dogma, etc., etc.,.  Aw, go on surprise me!  LOL"

Hi tt,

As I said, my big concern about your post was that, knowing you for so many years, it didn’t seem like your “voice.”   The particular words from “butt in” on to the end of that sentence were not ones that I could imagine you writing.  Your writing and word choice have always been elegant, your sentences beautifully phrased—almost like pieces of art!  Of course I know you’re intelligent!  That's why I worried...

"There is no question in my mind that there are different “kinds” of people.  I believe that's  normal for humanity.   I believe they should have the freedom to seek out one another.  However, it seems clear to me that the current polilitical flotsom largely made up of  power types of many varities, who would and in many cases are delighting in persecuting those who wish to practice the five freedoms guaranteed in the Constitution.  In the case of this conversation it's about freedom #2.  It appears that you're  practicing it unabashed and with gusto!   Bravo!  It was pointed out to me that what we've discussed would qualify as a thought crime as outlined in 1984 by Orwell and which was common in the 20th century under various dictators.  I'm sure there were others in other centuries where it was the same.  It is true, there is nothing new under the sun."

Thanks, tt!  I've always practiced freedom of speech "unabashed and with gusto."  This web site is but one example.  My views have gotten me into a lot of trouble my whole life, but I wouldn't/couldn't have lived life any other way--and my beliefs/speech/thoughts/writing have led to extraordinary attachments to many dear people of many different "kinds!"  For me, as I've said, these attachments are most important of all.

But please let us know, as lighter writes above:  How are you feeling?

Richard

[lighter]

teartracks:

I like the idea of hay bale farming very much.  Once the garden finishes I can flip them over, throw quilts on them, and use them for seating around the fire pit; )

hhaw

[sea storm]

I thought that we were already getting therapy on this site. We help each other and find our voices. We validate and support each other and occasionally call each other on our bullshit. This is all good therapy.

Seems like a very slippery slope to join the information highway and water down therapy by texting. It is a sad fact of life that we are all so detached that we must settle for texting. Its better than nothing though. Considering that at least 80 percent of communication is body language it seems a very limited way of communicating.
If you can't find a good therapist in Boston, then it says a lot about the state of affairs in teaching and grooming therapists. If we start churning out texting therapists the consequences are too serious to think about.

For example:  Hello I feeling awful
Therapist: How can I help?
Person:  I don't know. Maybe you could suggest a bridge?
Therapist: I hear you are very depressed and I would like to hear your story. I care how you feel.
Person: Oh here come the cat , I better feed her and take out the garbage.

See what I mean?

It always makes me freeze when Dr Phil says I have an app for counseling. It strikes me as self serving and crass.  Those are strong words I know and yet, if it is a last resort then it is better than a crisis line  with volunteers.  I mean calling a professional.