Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
How Do You Manage Your Stress?
Twoapenny:
Hi Lighter,
Well you read my mind! Yes, yesterday was a funny day, I was in a really great place yesterday morning and felt really content and by bedtime I was ready to slap someone, lol.
I'll be staying off Facebook for now; I'm not a massive user anyway and my sister's feed is usually pics of the kids and what they're up to which is what I love seeing (and is also why I got the willies when the snaps of the kids turned into endless posts about paedophiles and sex offenders) and I'm not making a massive effort re contact anymore. I will keep in touch via text (casual) and do birthdays etc but I feel more and more now that people are like food - you really need good, nutritious people who will feed your heart and your soul and make you feel good without taking endless amounts from you, and not the human version of burger and chips that ends up doing you more harm than good. So I'll be arranging get togethers with good people over the next few weeks and focusing on that, this will all pass pretty quickly.
And I hate that I stood up to that piece of **** and everyone else took his side and left me hanging but ................ I've always had this thing about being able to look my son in the eye and tell him that I did my best and really mean it, and I feel I have where SF is concerned. I raised the alarm, I alerted the authorities, I told the whole family (and anyone else that would listen) and realistically there's nothing more I could have done, or can do now. Best of all, I have gone on and lived my life the best that I can and worked on myself to strive to be the best person I can manage to be and I'm proud of that, and proud to be able to tell my son that. So bollocks to all of them and I think no-one had better annoy me today or they'll be getting a mouthful lol x
Twoapenny:
--- Quote from: Hopalong on April 14, 2017, 04:41:23 PM ---Well, you waded into a very unpleasant current unselfishly, Tupp, and learned what you needed to know. Your niece is okay. Whew. And bless you for enduring the discomfort of that communication in order to find out.
I'm sorry it brought up all those toxic spiderweb feelings for you. Same time, New Tupp is able to shake it off, refuse to let it seep in like an oily gas to spoil her OWN space and OWN Easter weekend. Trust her!
You don't have to keep up the contact, you really don't.
What can you do to remind yourself you know how to set boundaries? And how to reclaim your serenity and pleasure in the present?
Whatever that is, sending you hugs and hopes you'll re-anchor in the sweet, springtime, blooming, beautiful now. With all the New Life messages it gives.
hugs,
Hops
--- End quote ---
Hopsie, thank you for your spring time support, it helped so much :) I've had a good night's sleep (with my meditation music on) and serenity will be resumed! There are pottering about jobs to do at home, we can go out for a nice walk, I stocked the fridge and freezer yesterday so lots of nice meals and I might go mad and bake a cake :) Normal service has been resumed.
Will your pooch go Easter Egg hunting with you or would he scoff all the Easter Eggs? x
Hopalong:
Bravo!
Well, she would happily knock aside toddlers like bowling pins to EAT the Easter Eggs... :lol:
She was starved before she was rescued so she's very food focused. I have to put a big steel ball in the middle of her bowl to slow her or she chokes. She's done so well though. She's healthy, happy and the darling of downtown. Watching her transform from a broken dog into this prancing little goof who attracts pats and smiles like a super-magnet has been a joy.
I love walking downtown with her (our "downtown" is an all-pedestrian, practically-all-cafes wonderful magical brick mall, with boutiques and galleries and spots to eat or drink tea in the shade of huge trees down the center...with fairy lights, and buskers, and a huge stone fountain halfway down). It's a very dog-friendly place; the restaurants all put out water bowls.
Anyway, it's close, and one of my fav places to walk with her, because I get tired of going solo in the neighborhood. This way, I get my people-watching fix, and she gets lots of new feet and fur to sniff (and the great thing about cafe tables is that under them are CRUMBS). Every time I go there with her I have new contact with a stranger because she's got one of Those Faces. People can't resist her.
I tried to post a pic of her on Lighter's TTMMH thread but can't figure out the attachment. Ah well.
Happy day
Hops
Twoapenny:
Aw Hops that sounds lovely! What a nice place to live! A nice, friendly neighbourhood makes such a big difference, especially when you want to be around people a bit without actually making any arrangements. I love people watching. Dogs are such great conversation starters, there's nothing nicer than a friendly dog wanting you to make a bit of a fuss of them :) I love the idea of her knocking the kids over to get to the Easter Eggs :) Lovely to hear that she's changed so much, it's amazing what love can do :) x
Hopalong:
Just one more thought on your recent incident:
--- Quote ---And I hate that I stood up to that piece of **** and everyone else took his side and left me hanging but ................ I've always had this thing about being able to look my son in the eye and tell him that I did my best and really mean it, and I feel I have where SF is concerned.
--- End quote ---
Hating that everyone left you hanging, hear hear. So many families are cowards. And, because of sexist culture over time, so many dependent females are afraid to give up their support or their mate status, having not had the opportunity or the courage (or neither) to create their own status and support.
But the BIG takeaways are:
You stood up to that piece of shit!
You really did do your best. (At a measure many people can't meet.)
You honored yourself AND your son. Your best was beyond good enough.
The others' decisions are their own karma. But you did so well. THAT'S what will last of this, in your lifetime. You stood up. For simple truth and for yourself. And it made all the difference.
The courage and integrity that took is part of you and will always be.
Big, beautiful truth.
hugs
Hops
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