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This and That

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Twoapenny:

--- Quote from: lighter on May 08, 2018, 04:05:13 PM ---The memorial service was what it needed to be.  Everything went well, if a little late.

We filled the place with lush green ferns and moss....the gardeners were so happy with it, but happier still when we donated it to their new miss garden.  Seemed preordained.

My brother seemed very moved by every detail.  We had pictures of Dad up on trees, held by wire wrapped around the trunks.  There were arrangements wired to posts, and those had photos added as well.

We took communion under an overcast sky.... I really loved our Episcopal Priest, S.  She was so comforting, and appreciated having the service in a natural setting too.

We sprinkled some ashes in with the UN eaten communion wafers we, the sibs, buried... he'll be in that garden whenever we go back.

I feel good about the whole thing, particularly about not having glass and China.  It gave us more time to decirate, and enjoy friends and family.

Lighter

--- End quote ---

Aw, Lighter, it sounds like a lovely way to think, remember, say goodbye (or goodbye for now?  I like to think we can meet our loved ones again sometime).  I like that you were able to pass on the natural decorations to the garden and that your dad will be there for you to visit.  I do hope that there is some way people who have passed can see what's going on and know that their loved ones are together, sharing their memories and time.

I'm glad you were able to say farewell like that xx

lighter:
Thank you, Tupp and Hops....it was lovely.  If Dad was there, in that garden, he knew he was loved and honored by his children, and grandchildren. 

I can't wait to get back home.....one more week here with the never ending cottage project.  Won't get all windows changed out.  Won't get all shutters up.  Won't hey all painted.  Won't get a lot done I wanted done, but bright side is we have a bathroom door, hot showers, kitchen almost finished....plan for bunk room, 8 windows changed out, with shutters finishing up I the morning for those.  I hope.

Contractor spent too much time making private bedrooms perfect....SO much to do for security and I need to get rental program in place.

Lots done....ocean side of house looks brand new.  Just beautiful.

I'll count my blessings, and keep plugging away.

Lighter

Twoapenny:

--- Quote from: lighter on May 13, 2018, 12:17:16 AM ---Thank you, Tupp and Hops....it was lovely.  If Dad was there, in that garden, he knew he was loved and honored by his children, and grandchildren. 

I can't wait to get back home.....one more week here with the never ending cottage project.  Won't get all windows changed out.  Won't get all shutters up.  Won't hey all painted.  Won't get a lot done I wanted done, but bright side is we have a bathroom door, hot showers, kitchen almost finished....plan for bunk room, 8 windows changed out, with shutters finishing up I the morning for those.  I hope.

Contractor spent too much time making private bedrooms perfect....SO much to do for security and I need to get rental program in place.

Lots done....ocean side of house looks brand new.  Just beautiful.

I'll count my blessings, and keep plugging away.

Lighter

--- End quote ---

It sounds amazing, Lighter, you've worked a little miracle there :)  More to do, I get that, but an end is in sight, I would guess.  Kuodos to you for doing all of that whilst also grieving your dad and surviving tornados and laptop losses! xx

lighter:
Ack....putting up with the contractor was dreadful...notice I didn't say my contractor.  He's out, and on the island doing what disordered people do....accusing others of doing what they're doing TO them.

Things finally came to a head when he threatened me with a knife....wild eyed and screaming for me to put my hand down so he could chop off my finger.....and feel his pain.

He knocked a knuckle on his dominant hand whilst unplugging the skill saw.  He didn't admit that to me, preferring to say he sawed his finger half off while working.  It was 3 stitches....nothing important cut, mind you.  That story makes no sense and even if I explained everything it would still make no sense.  He does whine and cry for attention....gets angry if he's not babied. I'm done raising babies.

Long story short, he professed love, took the imminent rejection poorly, then settled in for two weeks to convince me he's a catch.  Mind you, his language of love includes stepping in front if me to blow his nose on the sidewalk by my foot.  I kid you not.  He's also been spiraling down the abusive pattern rabbit hole, which makes me withdrawal further.  By the time he basically stopped work, more time to request eye to eye "talks" where I tip tied through eggshells and tried to go back to work.

He complained about hernia pain, finger pain, bump on the head pain.... I suspect he drunkenly flipped himself out of a rocking chair then broke the chair in anger
So....he blames his irrational bullying behavior on me.....on being stuck in what he terms "this shithole" for so long, on the bump, the cut, the tummy ouchie....not kidding.  Sometimes he baby talks.

The more I refused to be afraid or fight the more he escalated, and we've been alone so no witnesses.  He does cry.  A lot.

After the knife incident I worried he'd make use of the machete in the LR.  The next morning I hid it, and went to do laundry on my own.  He asked about the machete....several pointed times then blessedly went to the other island. 

I can't put myself in my family through to this craziness again.  He was on phone half the night terrorizing my sister, and do the decision we as made to fire and put him out. 

He didn't quite understand that, and thought he'd force another round of talks.....when he got to the cottage I had my very large renter waiting with me.  This had him spitting mad, which looked like a gleeful insane imp cackling over all the things he would do to me once we were back in the States.  Threats were all over the board....legal stuff....finding me stuff...got chest to chest when renter carting his tools...made insane noises and more threats nose to nose.  I pushed him off if me and he spun out the door babbling to himself.

Now....after I said there was no possible romantic connection between us he asked to go outside and fight me.  I can't make stuff this crazy up!  He also asked me to kill him in his sleep, this while he was whining about his finger I think.  It all blurrs together, and he assaulted his helper the first week we were here so he can't blame time on the island, his finger, his head bump or me, though that's his story.

I'm wring out, and a tad jumpy, but keeping busy with male workers on the property till he flies out tomorrow afternoon...if he goes.

He's one wrong word away from a Bahamian jail cell, which I m certain won't improve his poor mental health.

Oh, and he doubled his fee.....and keeps adding ludicrous amounts for stupid to things.  He has no idea he has to file and fight a lawsuit in Nassau.  I I we him money.

Who behaves this way?  A grumpy toddler who wants attention for bad behavior, that's who.

:: Shaking head::.

I screwed up when I hired him, but he was lying, and posturing as a somewhat stable person at the time.

Now I'm paying to the price.

Lighter
PS. Send courage, and stamina.  I have to get tools and install the he rest of these storm shutters this week.

Hopalong:
Good god, Lighter.
This man is dangerous.

You don't need this drama or fear.

No real estate venture is worth THAT.

I hope you're safely away from him soon.

Hops

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