Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Mindfulness
lighter:
Tupp:
Docs want to remove gallbladders, not treat stones. That makes sense IF the patient isn't able or willing to change the habits that brought on the stones, kwim?
If the patient is willing, has been willing to make changes for years, then it's frustrating. I'm hoping muscle testing practitioner will hone in, and help.
There are pills to break down the stones, but they have to be taken forever, and they can harm the liver.... BIGGER problem, IMO.
We need our gallbadders..... sure, we can live without them, but we need them.
I hope she can figure this out. I would hate to end up in that boat.... it scares me.
Lighter
Hopalong:
Might be a genetic vulnerability, Lighter.
Might be true that you need to accept not being able to fix it for her, despite your distress at her suffering.
You are a kind friend. Sometimes, that's enough.
love
Hops
Hopalong:
PS I wrote a long article on lithotripsy when the machine first arrived at the medical center years ago. It was miraculous.
Patients with gallstones sit in a big tank of warm water, and magnetic beams are aligned with the stones. (Marks are drawn on the skin for the technician to aim at.) Then a simple button push and dat-dat-dat, a zapping noise. The beams pass through the water into the patient, precisely targeting the gallstones and leaving the surrounding tissues are unaffected. The stones are pulverized (without pain to the patient) into such tiny fragments that the gallbladder can then excrete them naturally. It's amazing, just incredible. Patient gets out, dries off, goes home.
So the gallbladder isn't removed, in that case. And there's no drug, no surgery. Hope your friend will check it out and that she may be a candidate for lithotripsy.
hugs
Hops
lighter:
That sounds like just the right thing, Hops. Then friend has to figure out how to avoid new stone formation: )
lighter:
My new T is female, specializing in anxiety, depression, trauma and addiction with 13 years in recovery herself. She practices traditional therapy, intuitive counseling, EMDR, TRM, energy, spiritual and Buddhist psychology, and life coaching.
I like her approach, bc she references the work of other doctors I've studied, and brain science to help me understand what we're doing, and how it helps. She takes time to really make sure I have some ONE important element, and take that with me when I leave her office.
I've seen her twice, and will see her weekly for a while.
She explained why trying to gut out way out of anxiety is so difficult. The amygdala and limbic system are already online, and we have to get under them, and unhook them with breathing, which engages our parasympathetic nervous systems. The more we breath into the PSNV, the more we build those pathways, and train our brains away from anxiety.
She'd like me to use Kardia 3 times a day, whenever, and at times of stress. Everything involves the breathing in... filling a vase, bottom up... stomach pushed out, and the breathing out.... slow, and complete.
Pushing on walls WITH ALL YOU HAVE, is useful. I notice I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD BE DOING DOING DOING, and pushing is very helpful at those times. I push on the steering wheel in the car sometimes, and that's helpful too. Remembering to breath is getting easier. I was always a shallow breather, and notice I actually stop breathing when I'm stressed.
Walking backwards, slowly, around a garbage can or anything on the floor, while breathing.
She added cross body patting this week. Cross arms over, hands on shoulders gently patting one at a time, slowly. If we go fast, we can create anxiety. Slow is calming so.... gentle pat.... wait a couple seconds then gentle pat again. Can do this on thighs as well, making sure arms crossing over body.
When she asked if I had a happy place, I realized I don't have one anymore that I visit. When I tried to go to the one I used during the trials..... it was just heartbreaking. I'm really sad about the time, and years I lost, and what my girls lost during those years. I used to picture myself walking into my house, which is where we lived when the girls were born, and greeting the girls... J in green foot in jammies.... Loldest by 22mo, in a diaper for some reason, but there, very real, and we just had a normal day in that happy place. Now it's a trigger.
In the past, with other Ts, they'd try to have me picture a grotto, or some unknown place, and that had me feeling like I needed to push on a wall.... to DO.... it felt like the lions were clawing through the door, how could I BE in this place that meant nothing to me?
I tried my own childhood this time, and that was triggering.... I think anything to do with children at this time is triggering for me. The child drawings on the walls were triggering as I looked around and paid attention to my surroundings, SO.... big information for me.
The next time I tried, I went back to my house, before the girls and second marriage, but after the first divorce, and I walked in my amazing tomato garden. I could see what I was wearing, my tools, smell the plants, and tend the compost bin, tie the vines.... feel the sun on my eyelids, and shoulders, and hear the birds, and insects.
I'd never experienced such relief, amazing, joyful, immediate, and addictive... I want to go back and back and back. I rely on it, in my mind, as a tool, and I'm not sure I could have found it without someone looking me in the eye, and leading me through the triggers and sadness, and pulling me out, and through it.
I don't have to go back and revisit all the trauma and heartache. I don't have to understand it, or anyone involved in it. I just have to practice breathing, building pathways, and training my brain to have choice, and choose.
Another thing that's making sense is the PAT.... training my brain to tolerate feeling OK, which is alien for me, not strong strong, but certainly there. I imagine it's more difficult for lots of people, but I can feel the undercurrent when I'm paying attention. PAT... Pleasure Affectation Tolerance? I think?
Anyway, I'm feeling very attached to this T, and she's so patient, and kind, and explains everything, and doesn't move on before I'm WITH her, and getting what she's trying to share.
I like the Buddhism. I like the references to Tara Brach, and Bessel VanDerKolk, and polyvagal theory, and WHAT the heck that tapping to the left of me belly button IS.... the psoas muscle holds a lot of energy, and memories and energy are stored in the body, and we're energetic beings.
This ties everything together, and makes sense of it for me.
I know choosing a T is so important, and I have clarity on that now.
The journey continues,
Lighter
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