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Mindfulness
Hopalong:
--- Quote ---I started naming colors and shapes for the girls when they were tiny, and just never stopped explaining/naming things for them
--- End quote ---
What a terrific insight, Lighter. Wonderful. Empty of shame. Just insight.
Love it!
--- Quote ---I am going to have to learn how to ask for what I want; simply...
--- End quote ---
Amber, same to you.
WOWS.
hugs
Hops
Meh:
I'm trying the 4-4-4 right now. It works.
lighter:
That's great news, G.
I try it every day, and it seems that tapping works best for me.
The doc said that deep belly gargling, and humming are other ways to calm ourselves.
I hummed all the way through the cottage renovation, with the crazy contractor upset, and demanding I stop. Honestly, I couldn't have stopped if I'd wanted to. Tomorrow I'll learn more about what people do, without realizing it, to calm down.
Lighter
Twoapenny:
Just catching up on your thread as well now, Lighter, wow! That is a lot you have going on right now! Do you find doing the work on yourself tiring or invigorating? I'm always curious as to how resetting patterns and systems feels for people - it's interesting that it can be doing good but make you feel worse, or make you feel better straight away. I'm keeping the 4 4 4 in mind.
It's sooooo easy to just do for people when you're used to doing that. I find myself doing things sometimes and realising son can do it himself and I'm just doing it out of habit - almost like muscle memory? Not even conscious, just reacting. I am looking to see if I can find an app for his IPAd where we can load up everything he needs to remember to take with him to college or for trips out so he can just use that rather than me checking with him. Well done for not commenting on the driving - I'm a terrible passenger and generally have to spend my time looking far out into the view rather than at the road or I think a crash is imminent every time we go around a corner :) Lol xx
lighter:
Tupp: I don't always manage to remain silent in the car, but I'm working really hard at it.
T suggested a book about co-dependency. I just sent a text asking for that title. I know I'm ready to receive those messages; )
Hops: Thanks for comment regarding my naming and explaining things to tiny ones. I SEE how it happened, and it would have bothered me in the past. In fact, I used to feeeeeeel I shooooouuuuld do things better/right/perfectly and I felt that all the time. I'm learning to drop judgments, and keep moving. It's super helpful, IME.
Today I realized that I'm sorry I didn't seek out a good T, or this kind of Brain Therapy for trauma work sooner. The thing is, I don't think the programs were out there, and I don't think Ts like this are easy to find. I was told go to THIS T for trauma.... somatic mainly, and that didn't make connections for me. Maybe it was the timing, after all the reading, and classes, and alternative therapies.... it all came together now, and wouldn't have before.
Today I learned that cold water helps engage the parasympathetic system better than anything. If you turn on the cold water the last 10 seconds of your shower, for instance.
Using the big muscles in the body, exerting energy.... just DOING... running, pushing, anything, is helpful. This doc favors using our body weight, push ups, etc, for 20 minutes a day, then doing cardio for another 20. In his opinion, THIS one thing will help with a lot of our chemical problems. Not all, but certainly a good start to a mindful program including nutrition, breathing, gaze stabilization, cognitive and balance excercises. I'm shocked at how much by balance improved since I started this program.
He used to have a teenaged boy client who came in the office every morning super aggressive. He sent him out to sprint a quarter-mile, and this young man came back super calm, and ready to work. Amazing example.
So, gargling deep and hard,
humming,
cold water (bath/splash/shower/swim)
tactical breathing 4-4-4
Breathing in 5 seconds, and out for 10
tapping.... karate chopping blades of hands together to get started, then inside eyebrows, then outside corner eyes, then under eyes, under nose, under mouth, under collar bones, under armpits, top of head while first stating problem we're working on TWICE< then tapping on how we want things to be.... tapping on accepting and loving ourselves completely and unconditionally.... is more helpful than I can explain.
I plan to do the frontal occipital hold, somewhere in here, and see how that changes things, or doesn't.
I feel like a road block to thinking clearly was dislodged. I'm curious how much difference I'll notice while doing work I've been procrastinating over.
::sigh:::
Breath, Lighter.
Breath.
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