Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
2019 Farm Life
Hopalong:
Yeh.
Do drive him to the help he needs. Now would be good
Why wait to be snowed in with him?
It's not mean. It's adult.
love
Hops
sKePTiKal:
Wow. This guy is totally off the wall. Holly & he just left, don't know if I convinced him to go to the hospital for the psych eval (a requirement for the center he chose first) or NOT. I almost don't care.
This morning he told me that Hol and her friend were using heroin. Which I know is an absolute lie. Maybe he's just angry with me, I really don't care about that. He's been making Hol & me miserable and anyone else who is around - uncomfortable - because he goes off into these emotional tailspins and lashes out verbally. Even asking him a question to clarify pieces of his story. Friend John (Hol's known him since HS) was the target of most of the attacks. Having been an RN, and the second person to point out that this guy was manipulative of Holly, we removed a lot of sharp objects. This guy had pics of where he'd been cutting himself.
Holly was MISERABLE because she really wanted to help him, but after a month he still couldn't make a basic decision about any future steps. So, I TOLD him, what my advice was and that he simply couldn't stay here any longer. I am a nervous wreck now...
but I have my Tibetan incense burning... and am just going have a very slow day today. I've told Holly she just can't invite someone (open-ended timeframe) who needs that much help & attention just to regulate his own emotions... and I think we failed miserably anyway because we're not TRAINED to do more than care... and it took a huge toll on us. I know she did it because of another friend who committed suicide and he mentioned that at one point he was suicidal.
I don't know how the pros stay sane.
lighter:
Yikes, and yikes, Amber: I don't like the sound of Hol traveling with this unsteady fellow, having been ejected from her/your home, without a plan he feels great about.
I don't like the idea of his being angry either.
Please let me know when Hol's dropped him, and back on the road.
I'll breath a heavy sigh of relief.
Lighter
Hopalong:
DITTOS. Fingers crossed, light aloft.
Why would he say that about Hol?
I'm shocked by that (along with the whole story).
And so glad you have extricated yourself.
Seems the I-gotta-fix-this-person gene runs through you both.
It's great that you've drawn a boundary with H about who comes to your farm.
xxoo keep us posted...
Hops
sKePTiKal:
She got back home about 5 pm. We all went to bed early, and finally got some sleep last night.
Nurse wanted to ask Hol some questions too, so she had to stick around and also provide moral support to her friend. His plan is, once the 3 day evaluation is over, is to enter a residential counseling facility... and go from there. Steve, Hol's sweetie came over last night with his big lab - a friend of Knuckles - but he got stuck in the ditch leaving this morning.
Holly & Helga (her new jeep) has already freed him and gotten him on his way this morning.
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