Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Meandering
Meh:
I think I have an undiagnosed learning disability of sorts. My old GPA was at 3.3 so I muddle through okay and overall I'm usually maintaining what I need to stay above the radar. Still as far as being fair to myself I'm starting to look into some info about learning styles etc. & learning problems. Sometimes I really do struggle I'm not a super genius. I've never liked just passable grades in the past but I think sometimes being just good enough is ENOUGH.
Out of curiosity I looked up some information about getting tested for learning disabilities and it costs $300-$1000.00 + hahaha which is interesting to say the least.
Somehow in all this time crunch I need to give myself some space. I'm really wondering if I can buy myself some time.
The time pressure I have put myself under is not realistic.
I've delayed unemployment which is probably dumb but what that also means is maybe I've inadvertently bought myself some more time. I just don't know right now.
I think the adviser I spoke with initially at my old school was excited and happy to help but there is so much I haven't told her. And I don't need to tell her my life story.
It's just A LOT A LOT A LOT I need to clarify for myself.
There is a program at the community colleges I'm wondering if I can "declare" one thing to them as it is a separate program, for one quarter only. And then Winter quarter declare something totally different to the TAA program. I have a feeling I can't but considering the REAL world does make things complicated...Admissions is not a given. There are competitive and capacity constraints.
Or if I must and if it ends up only being 1-2 classes should I self pay one quarter and can I qualify to collect unemployment while doing that (probably not) They are so specific about collecting unemployment while being in school that is what is great about the TAA program. Reasonable yes, maybe not realistic I don't know. Or would I just stop unemployment temporarily and then start the claim again in Winter quarter. I could do that. I could. But living expenses ughhhh. Like my friend with daycare issues has pointed out she is worried that when all is said and done going back to school even with free tuition is still going to put her deeper into the hole. .... Ideas ideas.
I mean it's really bending the heck out of definitions, maybe I can justify the 1-2 last classes as remedial education. Remedial education for the program I want to go into which is (?) Bwa hahaha Oy.
My friend says I'm overthinking this all but I really need to exhaust myself. I really do. I feel there is some point in it eventually.
** I could self pay for one quarter it's a possibility. ... Maybe I think I have to get some kind of waiver to do this.
I don't want to spend two more years at a community college to learn how to be a secretary. I'm also not going to be an industrial welder. They might have lists of options but what REALLY pertains to me.
8/5th - It's past 4 AM. I got into bed was tired and then felt wide awake thinking about details. Now I am on college sites again looking and looking. Again I keep coming back to the fact that I just want to take some classes. I just need to pick something.
Hopalong:
G,
I really like the idea of a public health degree.
Given all you've been through, I think you'll have a mature perspective on it that would serve you really well with assignments, etc.
I think once you wade through the decisions, you're going to be so happy engaging your mind, learning again, and moving forward.
Keep in mind how many, many, many other adult students are rebooting their lives and how inspiring and motivating it is to do this. No matter what.
You are worth it.
You are a human mean worth education and training.
Your future will be calmer, easier and more meaningful.
You deserve it.
And you don't have to be perfect.
These decisions have consequences but ALL consequences you imagine are better than the consequence of not taking advantage of the opportunity.
You can do this.
Hugs
Hops
Meh:
There are at least 4 sets of paperwork packets I have to submit for approval and reviews. The first I should submit this week or next week. The next two I should submit by the end of this month I believe. The 4th I should submit sometime in September I think and this is the only one where it needs the case manager to approve a Major and school. I think.
The first packet is going to cause the case manager to start bugging me though maybe I will submit that on Aug the 16th. coo
There are multiple schools and hundreds of Majors albeit I can probably rule a lot out. I am freaking out.
I'm tired, I don't have to explore or do due diligence. Panicking and feeling I still won't know in just a few weeks what the right thing to do is. I'm an adult I should be able to figure this out. I should just make a list of all the programs I have looked at and decide which one sounds the most interesting to me. Why not.
I'm almost so overwhelmed I don't want to do this anymore. Whats wrong with me.
OH HOW I WISH I WENT ON A VACATION somewhere.
I should make an advising appointment with my local Uni I'm afraid they are a bit elitist and they will look down on me for approaching school the way I am but they have to realize that being a displaced worker, making a career change quickly is a reality too. I can just go in with that attitude. Not be intimidated. Be real that this is a SUDDEN SHIFT. My parents haven't been meticulously plotting out my career since I was in diapers.
Meh:
Was looking at an English technical writing BA, then Communications. Now I'm looking at Journalism but it's in decline. It's all computers and chemistry is on the rise blah blah blah almost everything requires a strong science base.
Oh my god, I think I just found a horrendous grammatical error on the BA program website for an online Uni degree in Communication. Staring at the white wall above my boots wondering "what's a person to do". They shouldn't let first year students mess with the university website pages it's too confusing. I will probably end up having to take some accounting certificate course, oh well so be it if that's what happens.
Twoapenny:
G, just logging on quickly but my two cents for what it's worth:
When I look back my regret is that I didn't do what I love. At school, all I enjoyed and all I was any good at was drama. I wanted to go to drama college. Everyone laughed, said I was stupid, pipe dream and so on. So I didn't go. Then I found out there was a college in London for people on low incomes - all the classes ran in the evening and at weekends so that people could hold down full time jobs. I went to secretarial college to learn how to be a PA so I could put myself through the drama classes - but when I tried to do the drama qualification at the college they told me I couldn't get in on one A Level to the 'proper' drama school so I didn't apply and just got a job instead (and later found out I could have got in on one A-Level, they waived formal entry requirements and went on potential and dedication instead).
Then I went to Uni and took English and Drama - again, only took the English because everyone said drama wasn't a proper subject so I took English as well. Then I found I got better grades in English so I dumped drama all together. I still regret it and I still wish I'd gone down the path of what I loved, rather than what seemed sensible or most useful.
I only say all of that (and keep in mind I don't know how your system works there so there may be certain hoops you have to jump through to do anything at all) but I would try to pick out a few courses that you think you'd love to do - regardless of work opportunities or previous experience - and then look at those more closely and see if one of them would work for you (or maybe more than one, so you have a back up plan). But in your shoes right now I'd really try to go for something that will just be an enjoyable experience and give you back your zest for life :).
As far as being elitist goes, I don't know what it's like here but in the UK Universities are businesses like any other. They need bums on seats and tuition fees paid and they love mature students - because they've chosen to go, they know it's a great opportunity and they work hard. The kids that are there because Daddy threatened to cut their allowance if they didn't go or because they didn't fancy working in McDonalds and three more years at college puts that off for them or because everyone else in their family is a doctor/lawyer/midwife or whatever - they don't work so hard and they don't do as well.
So my humble advice to you would be to look into what you love, see what you can get that works for you from that and then get in there with your head held high and show them what you're made of. Tasks like applications I find I can cope with better if I break the job down into stages (get paperwork together. Find certificates to do with blah blah blah. Photocopy form so I can practise on a spare. Get pencils, pen, ruler. Address the envelope. Fill in easy bits of the form first - name, address, date of birth. Start drafting other bits. Draft again. Re-draft. Finalise. Proof read. You get the idea). And I block out a chunk of time and break that into ten minute chunks and I cross off each ten minutes as I go (I don't know why this helps me but it does, ten minutes at anything doesn't seem like too long and I'm always amazed how much I can do in ten minutes and it gets me down my list faster - just makes me feel like it's easier for some reason). It might help you. You might have a better way to tackle it anyway. But whatever is going on now, I think you've got this :) xx xx xx
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[#] Next page
[*] Previous page
Go to full version