Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
The island
lighter:
About fear and the ocean. I'm fascinated and exhilarated by it. Maybe terrified by its depth, but the beautiful blue shallows invite me.
I've been fearful of sharks....snorkeling happily on the island. I have a nervous laugh so it sounded like some awful demon laughing through the snorkel in my ears as I looked off in the distance for an approaching shark that never appeared. I don't do that to myself anymore. Bad idea.
I've wished sharks would get me during my first marriage. Divorce put an end to that.
Now, I'm just assuming I'll be fine in crystal clear water.. Humans aren't on the list of preferred shark foods.....I try to remember that. Murky water isn't for me.
There are times I'm forced to question myself....like when French boy and I were on the HUGE raft, gently floating over the reef with the tide on our bellies, dive masked faces in the water looking at the different fish families. 2 locals appeared very concerned about our faces being torn off. And I will tell you.....my carefully cultivated chill wavered a bit. I was surprised at their level of concern. Obviously, they've seen and experienced things elevating their caution. I noted their concern.
The housekeeper thinks swimming on the reef is a sharky idea she doesn't at all care for. That's concerning, imo.
Local divers talk about encounters with hammerhead sharks, "beeeg" sharks and that ruffles my chill in January, Feb and March. I admit that.
The thing is, fishing boats go past the cottage in the afternoons and the sharks know the fish cleaning stations are going to be busy. The sharks swim by the Cottage going in and out of the harbor. Sometimes we through a fishing line out and reel in a fish only to it bitten in half by a passing shark and THAT reminds me of the movie JAWS. I'm not going swimming at night in the Atlantic, for sure.
Now, that said, I've seen sharks attracted to a appeared lobster and I intend to take lobsters. Maybe spear some fish, if I'm lucky. THAT, for me, means I'll drop any speared fish or lobster if sharks show up....like the locals do. Getting back into the raft, with an interested shark circling, seems like a good idea too. I'm guessing there will be some squealing and rushing, but all will be well.
I know "the boy" used to gather fish and lobster on our beach with a wrist sling all day long when on the island....the boy was my niece's Tarzan like boyfriend. I've seen little 2 man John boats with men diving into the water for lobster and conch near the Cottage.
I can do that.
I think; )
Lighter
Hopalong:
Fear-stirring.
Same thing I do in other areas of life.
In recent years since I only wind up at the ocean some Octobers I haven't been swimming in the waves for ages. For me, the ocean has become something to look at and listen to, gift enough. I don't fish there but should own what I eat. Can't do lobstah.
Lighter, I see your excitement over being at the cottage, while also imagining your relief when you're pondering selling. However you decide, it is/has been/will be/was a menaingful place in your life.
hugs
Hops
lighter:
It's an interesting to focus....or shift focus to the best memories of a place, person or thing as I'm attempting with the Cottage, Hops.
"The boy" had me running through a ground pounding thunder storm during a stay in my home. I was terrified I'd be electrocuted, but at the same time exhilarated and moving with purpose as I ran to make our phones dry then ran back to the raging creek we were work/playing in.....garthering beautiful rocks and crawfish/salamanders...just tromping through it in the rain, like children...was amazing. Overcoming that fear felt amazing.
It's the same with the Ocean.... the ocean, a storm, lightening, the wind could destroy me without noticing my presence. That can be terrifying and shut me down or it can be scary while I embrace, invite, join and overcome my fear.
Right now I'm feeling like buying a fish cleaning glove and embracing everything, though I'm still not one for crowds.
About owning our food....ya. There's something primal in fishing/gathering, cleaning and preparing wild food. I want to learn more about the plants and have some fresh tomatoes and peppers growing too, but for now.....the fish cleaning glove and 10 gallons of paint is on my list this trip.
Anyone know anything about marine paint?
Lighter
lighter:
We tried to leave Friday but big waves knocked out navigation about 12 miles out.....Ft.Lauderdale is 45 miles....had to turn back.
We're readying to leave by 9:30. The extra time meant bunk room AC drain fixed, washer leak fixed, paint touch up done, threw out all moldy things and it feels so good in cottage today!!!!
Will write about the trip in a day or so. 9 people in the cottage, the 7....... I feel....surprisingly calm and centered🌞
Lighter
sKePTiKal:
I hope conditions are better today Lighter! It's helpful to picture a warm tropical spot about now, from my very chilly (but not wintry) mountain.
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[#] Next page
[*] Previous page
Go to full version