Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Farm Doin's - 2020
Hopalong:
I have similar thoughts about the accused rapist next door. He has new charges, from an outlying county. Which I find completely believable, but fingers crossed.
I have used bright powerful energy ever since I moved in. When he tried to get friendly, I would stiffen up into an upright snotty lady persona instantly, and decline my head courteously, and walk on indoors with a regal don't-fuck-with-me posture. (My inner thought is just a steel boundary, a loud kind of "absolutely NOT, I am not going to be pals with you").
He's never bothered me since. He isn't on his property often, thank heaven, although his miserable wife is at times. They have other places. But my hope is that one of these days he'll be put on trial and go away for a nice loooooong time. Bad vibes, but also coward vibes.
Being good friends with two other neighbors feels protective, and I sense he won't aggress where he lives.
hugs
Hops
lighter:
Amber:
I was so sad to read about the death of the boy in your area. There's no explaining that kind of horror, IME.
I've experienced the presence of an evil person or people. I can't say what that is, exactly, either. It felt like molevolent energy... super focused energy. Looking for a place to land and become more of what it was. It was looking to exert itself on others, to be seen and felt. To impact others.
Maybe those people don't feel they exist unless they're exerting force on a more vulberable person. I have no idea. I'm not built that way. I catch myself trying to picture the people, causes and conditions leading to this..... state in a human being. It's always a mistake.
There must be levels of evil. Of energy always looking to inflict trauma, and energies finding opportunities and seizing them, when they otherwise might not be so focused exclusively on doing harm.
I don't believe any child is born with a malevolent spirit/energy/a will to do harm. I supposed there are children in the world who's stories and parents would give me pause, but I have to believe there's something acting on them... something creates that change in them. That's what I believe today.
I absolutely believe in our innate sense of identifying predators and prey. Of BEING one of the other, as well.
My youngest dd had a friend over the other night. DD's older cousin said this friend gave off "kindnappable" vibes. Niece just zeroed in on what is a likely truth, quickly.
There's evil we can talk to, and evil that's coming at us, bc it's come at many people before us, and will go on attacking those who come after... until caught or stopped.
Assuming the best in everyone is..... something that's not normal, iME. It's something that's trained into people, mostly women, IME. I think some parents do it to their children bc it makes their lives easier... things like...."You don't hate that dress..... you don't like those pants... you don't dislike playing with Jenny, etc." I know there are parents who DO intend to harm their children. I think many just don't know better.
To ignore one's instincts is counter intuitive. To train someone to ignore their instincts... is..... can be many different things.
I hope we all, on this board, choose to honor ourselves and our instincts above all else.
I'll be curious how your ideas around evil develop, Amber.
Hops: I'm so glad you have pooch there. She's not just a great companion. She's a willing early warning system. Dogs are born protectors of their territory and pack members, IME.
Lighter
sKePTiKal:
Lighter - a super-focused malevolent energy - is REAL close to what I felt. But it looks to corrupt and INFLUENCE other's actions... against prey. Including those of us who can recognize it; we ourselves can be vulnerable.
How it passed by me (even while freaking me completely out) I'll never know. Maybe I still have protection against that, that I haven't recognized yet.
Hopalong:
It's odd to me that I described using "bright, powerful energy" because the truth is I'm completely lost in y'all's discussion of dark forces and evil and all that.
Seems inconsistent (me). I'm not much of a believer in elaborate energy ideas. But I did describe using that. I think what I felt was something like that...but I was also using class signals, class intimidation. Maybe that's an off-putting energy. I sure knew I was drawing on something protective, insulative. And I know intuition is real, and I believe in the possibility of good things happening.
But I have no belief in magic or special connections with energy fields, or shamanism, or Tarot or astrology, so I'm kind of in the weeds on this one.
I think (for me only) they veer too close to religions, and I find nature awesome enough. I don't feel comfortable about the "supernatural" realms, neither the "good ones/gods" which harm so many psychologically due to a lot of religious teachings (particularly females) nor the "bad ones/devils" which harm even more. I do not believe in a force of evil. Yet I still hold on to vestiges of my childhood faith. Until a few years ago, I held a trace belief in the power of prayer.
Very confusing. I have strong mystical tendencies at times, but as usual, I'm so deeply allergic to definitions of what all that is, that I stick with mystery.
I do recognize there is an emptiness or amorality in some people that show a void, an absence of good, an inability to be moved by empathy. Maybe it's the same thing as what people mean by evil; I'm just flopping around semantically.
My main thoughts about the killer teenagers were more psychologically oriented -- as in, isolated youth with little to draw on, in a bleak rural culture which used to offer or demand vital activities and meaningful, sustaining roles for many of them has been replaced by vacuous media and an extremely dark and dangerous internet....so many are losing their way.
Nothing justifies what they did. But I think the culture has lost old touchstones of community that held youth close and nurtured them. And media and internet and brutal political corruption and neglect have dug pits in a lot of vulnerable kids, to be filled by the handiest cultural trash, which is now flows in a torrent into their minds.
I don't think we should go backward. But we have to find a way to care about our kids, in every zip code, with superb public education for ALL of them, and books and thinking instead of screens and playing...and mentors and extended families of support even if those are made of volunteers. Kids are getting SO lost today.
Some of them are wired wrong and born dangerous, but I think most are born innocent and vulnerable to neglect, to poisoning, to toxic masculinity, to violent culture, to horror, to loneliness so profound it numbs them...and mayhem calls.
hugs
Hops
sKePTiKal:
Most of my life, I've stayed within those definitions for human nature too Hops. That's why I spent so many years learning as much as I could about those different ways to "explaining life/world to yourself". There is ENOUGH there, contradictory and otherwise, to study for a lifetime.
Chi, as in Chi Gong or Tai Chi, is energy. The chakras are energy. I've always seen emotions as a form of energy.
It made absolute sense to me that you said "bright, powerful energy" Hops; I know the taste of that one, too. That is exactly the energy in the last form of the 103 movements - a "ward off" position/movement. Mayhap we've tripped over a new sometimes topic here for insights & discussion. The number of symbols - across faiths & the arts - that represent that energy standing against "evil"... is HUGE.
IF, it's accepted that light and dark always co-exist within the realm of life and human experience... then, those odd passing INTENSE sensations of Bright energy or pure evil... that manifest in reality... would indicate a serious imbalance. And of course, we can pretty much see the evidence of that in current events. Even Mother Nature feels menopausal these days. Reiki purports to help balance energy flow in individuals; is there a Reiki for the world? Life? LOTS of things are available at an individual level.
At the collective consciousness level, it seems there is an absence and gross misunderstanding of what balance truly is... some days it even seems it's a willful denial and active resistance to the idea that balance is a good thing. IE, there are cracks in the collective's being and awareness that allows evil to disperse and spread more quickly. Unless there is enough bright, powerful energy to banish the evil back into the shadows under the rock from under which it crawled out at that opportunity.
Transformation processes are alternately chaotic, terrifying, stressful, frustrating, absurdly comical and ultimately provide a satisfying sense of accomplishment or a relief in coming out the other side more whole and intact. (Hopefully)
This is starting to really ramble again. But I'm focused on finding a recommendation on "what to do" (if anything) on a few different levels about this particular kind of time-specific experience in life that exists right now. As far as inner practices and possibilities to counter some of the effects. What I'm talking about in "current events" is really just beginning. And while the practical "what to do" aspects are widely covered and shared lots of places... the inner work is just left to flounder and flail... and find respite in things there seem to "magically" be no shortage of.
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