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Twoapenny:
--- Quote from: CB123 on July 13, 2020, 09:25:44 AM ---I'll check out the drone site, Tupp. Thanks for passing that along! I never get tired of them.
BBC had an absolutely stunning shot of the Neowise Comet streaking above Stonehenge last weekend. A fellow said he went specifically to see it and he was speechless. He said he will never again see anything like that. I think if I ever went to Britain and saw some of the things I have read about for so long, I would probably just go face down in the grass and cry.
Meanwhile, it's going to be 103 degrees today (39.4 C), so I'm planning food that requires no cooking. Not even walks today.
CB
--- End quote ---
Ha ha, you could lay down and cry, there are lots of beautiful places and spaces. There's also a lot of rubbish, traffic, drunk people and other less desirable things lol, but if you ever do get over here I would be very happy to show you around and shout at the drunk people for you if necessary :)
103 degrees is hot. Oh my days, I think my English skin would fry. It's raining here at the minute, not very warm and it feels like it's almost dark even though it's only five in the afternoon because it's so cloudy.
The comet pictures have been breathtaking, haven't they? Although one person got the sort of shot I normally do; just cloud and a kind of smudge on one side, that did the rounds of the internet today and made me laugh :) xx
Meh:
For those who felt they were somehow perpetually rejected by a narcissistic family member etc. I never fully understood the science of it. Maybe the anterior cingulate cortex is completely messed up forever.
https://www.purdue.edu/uns/html3month/2005/050727.Williams.exclusion.html
Meh:
@ TWO
--- Quote from: Twoapenny on July 13, 2020, 08:32:26 AM ---It's nice that you caught up with people, G, I've found it harder and harder to make the effort the last few weeks and a couple of others I know have said the same. I'm not sure why, just different habits now, maybe? Good that you got to chat though, and hopefully there will be a time in the not too distant future when you can get together again xx
--- End quote ---
Oh GOD YES Two, there is a malaise setting in. I felt an uneasiness or lack of motivation to reach out and return one person's call and then zoom with the other one. I did it because I want to be a decent friend and also for my own mental health. I never intended to drop the ball either, but a combo of moving further away AND quarantine has made it, so I don't want to see them. I do want to see them, but I'm not going to risk it right now. Plus, it's not very satisfying to have phone calls and zoom meetings some days. The word depression is overused; it could be appropriate here though? The more time goes on without contacting someone, I feel like I don't want to. But also I have nothing too exciting to add sometimes, I find myself quiet while they chat away, it's not always like that it's like the weather. I hope I get chatty again at some point.
It is getting harder, maybe phone calls don't ding our reward system that much or we all got so boring! Come to think of it both friends were telling me the details of cleaning out their closets. It's not exactly the best conversation stuff.
Twoapenny:
--- Quote from: Garbanzo on July 15, 2020, 01:29:03 AM ---@ TWO
--- Quote from: Twoapenny on July 13, 2020, 08:32:26 AM ---It's nice that you caught up with people, G, I've found it harder and harder to make the effort the last few weeks and a couple of others I know have said the same. I'm not sure why, just different habits now, maybe? Good that you got to chat though, and hopefully there will be a time in the not too distant future when you can get together again xx
--- End quote ---
Oh GOD YES Two, there is a malaise setting in. I felt an uneasiness or lack of motivation to reach out and return one person's call and then zoom with the other one. I did it because I want to be a decent friend and also for my own mental health. I never intended to drop the ball either, but a combo of moving further away AND quarantine has made it, so I don't want to see them. I do want to see them, but I'm not going to risk it right now. Plus, it's not very satisfying to have phone calls and zoom meetings some days. The word depression is overused; it could be appropriate here though? The more time goes on without contacting someone, I feel like I don't want to. But also I have nothing too exciting to add sometimes, I find myself quiet while they chat away, it's not always like that it's like the weather. I hope I get chatty again at some point.
It is getting harder, maybe phone calls don't ding our reward system that much or we all got so boring! Come to think of it both friends were telling me the details of cleaning out their closets. It's not exactly the best conversation stuff.
--- End quote ---
It's definitely the lack of something to talk about with me, G. I don't live the most interesting life at the best of times and I do all my deep and meaningful stuff on here. At the moment, no-one I know has anything to talk about, because there's really nothing going on other than trying to avoid catching anything, for most people. So yes, I have made the effort to text, just to say hi, but other than that I've the one friend I always talk to once a week and we just have that sort of friendship where we can chat about nothing in particular anyway. I think a lot of people are feeling the same way. I think the initial novelty of having lots of time to clean out cupboards has passed!
I have arranged a socially distanced coffee with another parent I know who lives nearby, in her garden, and if that remains a reasonably safe activity I might try to do that regularly. She has said the same thing though, that she's got into the habit of not speaking to anyone and she had to really force herself to make the effort. Hopefully we'll all feel a bit more sociable once we can meet up without passing on scary germs!
I'll have a look at that other link you posted later on, it looks interesting! xx
Hopalong:
I like this topic...feels as though connecting/conversations are really about everything, right now, with so much activity suspended.
I'm sometimes thinking of social connection these days as like preventive medicine or exercise. I don't enjoy it all the time, but sense it's an essential protection against future depression. I am making myself reach out, think of somebody who might enjoy the phone, or I'm trying to encourage myself to schedule a 30-minute Zoom. I am concerned about winter isolation so want to maximize whatever connections I have now so we might stay in contact (even Zoom) during winter, to push back against loneliness then. I figure for every less-than-thrilling chat I have now, the habit of connecting when I can might be some insurance against spinning down when the cold moves in. So I'm heading to other people's back yards too, those who have space for 8-foot visits and have said they'd enjoy it. I'll soak up the sight of friendly faces, which will matter more, ultimately, than anything we say, I figure. That's the plan, anyway.
The Zoom meeting that really makes a solid emotional difference to me is my Covenant Group. We really know each other by now pretty well, and we also rotate leading the meeting with different topics. Nothing formal, but a few "questions to ponder" the leader emails beforehand. Anybody can veer the comments in any direction they want, and we use a taking-turns structure so everyone knows they'll be really listened to at some point. It eases the mind and heart, I find.
I led a topic I called "Time Shifts" last time, and it went all over the place but people seemed to really feel good about it. The thing I notice in that group about Zoom is something I wrote up for the church newsletter that surprised me. The tech creates a new view of the participants I've found myself enjoying at a different level. When we meet ftf, we're basically across a room or side by side, and though I'd never want it to be permanent, in this weird time, Zoom also has a silver lining I can notice. Each time an individual speaks, and because they're fairly close to the camera, I find I'm savoring the expressions (or micro-expressions) on their faces close up, as I've never really been able to see before. Noticing how the look in their eyes warms or changes as they speak. Picking up on backgrounds in their homes, a painting or color or plant -- gives me a sense of another unique layer of personality. Or cat! A couple are cat people and every now and then a cat just sticks its butt in the picture or its tail drapes through the view. Funny and comforting. (My dog invariably winds up jamming her nose under my chin to be sure she gets a turn.)
"Time Shifts" became a winding commentary about quarantine feelings (kind of a suspension), age, nature/seasons, cosmic differences, the perspective of sleeping without alarm clocks, noticing, noticing. I think "noticing" was really the theme. But talking about time, even as it seems scary right now, with them was comforting. We also considered moments in our lives when time seemed to race or slow, and why. I enjoyed it. Mainly because of seeing them, and how they all keep showing up. We're going to do a caaaaarefully socially-distanced reunion, maybe, later this summer.
I have one other "group conversation" Zoom that meets twice a month, a co-ed secular discussion group that's evolving into just a social kind of time. Somebody hosts it and there's a take-turns time at the beginning where people check in with what's been going on. (Last time a painful moment was when one couple explained they lost their son 10 days ago...but it was so good they were there, shattered but warm and present.) They're all very smart, good hearted people, and I felt grateful. Both of these groups have about eight members, which seems to be a decent size for sharing for about an hour and a half or sometimes two. (I left a little early.)
Anyhoo, that's my input on Coversations at the mo'.
hugs
Hops
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