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'23 - The Adventure Continues ;)

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sKePTiKal:
No, S was merely stating his preference. B, on the other hand - saw exactly that, that S was expecting to have his pick. Hence: miscommunication, with triggered patterns being applied on an ASSUMPTION/PERCEPTION that wasn't accurate... and absolutely no attempt to communicate about it and ask questions/clarify/ or anything. Just judgement...

and Hol & I were trying figure out just WTH was going on and why. Partly, B was grumpy over other things... and just pulled this reaction from his limited pocket of triggered reactions/"tricks". Sigh. Unfortunately, that IS the kind of behavior he's experienced from a LOT of people that proclaimed they were his buddies, or brothers in arms, etc. Hol & S are perfectly capable of getting their own - and that's the solution we settled on, between us girls.

No big deal between US. But for B, it was like waving a red flag in front of a bull. And he hasn't really gotten to know S yet. S and he HAVE been cooperating on some projects around here... successfully communicating even... but B very much judges S on leaving Hol to do the physical work around here, instead of pitching in and doing it himself (and it's really none of his business; it's between Hol & S) and my very vocal, explicit D told him so, in no uncertain terms. LOL.

I THINK it's all growing pains - assimilation into the pack issues. And as far as Hol & I are concerned should be blowing over & everyone moving on. No reason to suspect otherwise... so far.

Obviously, there's some male ego involved. I know the background, the why... and I'm wanting to avoid any unjustified conflicts or territorial issues. Hol has the same interest... so until the boys spend enough time together to get to know each other better we're kinda comparing notes and supporting each other's wish to keep the peace and avoid misunderstandings that fester into resentments... that become issues to be resolved. B & S come from VERY different kinds of male experiences... so some translators are required.

Hopalong:
Oooof.

Sounds like B is judging S on very traditional masculinity expectations.
And good for Hol for setting him straight.

head down, hoping for the best...
Hops

sKePTiKal:
In the big picture scale of things going on, the misunderstanding isn't very important or huge. It's going to happen, no matter the combination of people. Just one of the challenges of multi-generational "cooperative" living. That one resolved... and people moving on.

It's quiet days here, too. Projects waiting for better weather, etc. Still, there are things that can be done so we're plodding on. And tax season is a hurry up & wait too. A lot of stuff I have to pass on to CPA won't be available for a couple more weeks.

We're all in what we call "slug mode"; piddling around with things. Part two of B's pain mask is temporarily installed in a couple weeks; if that is satisfactory... then the full surgery will happen shortly thereafter. So, he's probably here till some time in March.

There are a couple more trips to get all his stuff here. I'm hoping we have room for it. Hol & I are gonna need to plan our run to MI, too. It would help if B were here, to manage the animal situation. But, we'll see what we can do. Once the gardens go in, then there's even more need to stick close to home. Juggling all that, is a bit of a trick. Yeah, there's zoom; facetime. But this kind of thing works better face to face, I think.

Today's gourmet delight will probably be a big pot of chili. Still consolidating and trying to finish off the product of my frenzy of holiday baking. Some things are keeping better than others; my toffee didn't quite set firm enough.

So, it's a very slow life around here right now. Soon to change! as soon as the weather permits and we get B running as smoothly as possible, physically.

lighter:
Ohhh, chili!

We made a couple pots of chili mac on the island and it was SO good.  Didn't last an hour.

You're so right about problems popping up, Amber....the COWs.  Crisis if the week.

Good the last problem blew over.  I hope MI, animals and gardens get handled in the best possible way very soon.

Lighter

Hopalong:
I didn't know the family enterprise was in MI, thought it was MD. Duh. Hope that trip goes well for you and Hol.

The idea of you having a slow time is really nice. And, to hear less of an overwhelming project list and more just...being...is nice too.

The patience and commitment you've shown B as he takes freaking forever to get all the way moved has been nothing less than heroic. I'm figuring you really, really love this man. :)

I hope the rest of winter encourages the making of lots more slow-cooked nourishment for YOU.

hugs
Hops

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