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'23 - The Adventure Continues ;)

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lighter:
I'm just going to drop my head, say a prayer and hope B receives the relief and proper care he's due.

His patience and intestinal fortitude is admirable and I'm so happy he has you and Hol on his team, Amber.

Lighter

sKePTiKal:
Hops - it's not nearly so dire as all that; nor all the military's fault (just like many other humans, he does have early history too). It's more a transparent overlay that shades his experience. It doesn't really HAVE to be there and it's usually easy to redirect his tendency to always "color" things in only the old, neural pathways rut. It just is, and he's working on it.

The pain situation is pretty much settled & under control Lighter. There is always going to be "maintenance" stuff to it - there is no "this will fix it forever" fix. This whole insurance debacle is caused by bureaucracy - they expect a report to be filed by the treatment center evaluating the amount of "improvement" he's gotten from the two surgeries. B's gov't benefits are dependent on that report, mind you. They HAVE stopped his payments before.

So, the center sent a request for approval from the insurance people on June 13th, for a functionality test... which will give the docs the hard facts on how much improvement B's gained. No one ever told us that the test was ordered or that the request was sent back in June. Doc's office told us that the INSURANCE people would call B and tell him where to go for this test (hopefully not back into DC or anywhere that far from us) and they would arrange all that - not the doc's office. We have heard NADA from those people. He is calling the insurance people and Dept of Labor (his main insurer is Federal Worker's Comp, due to the original injury being service related) today, then they have 3-4 days to call him back.      :rolleyes:

Yet there IS a deadline (for B) to have the letter sent (and acknowledged) by them.

:rolleyes:    :rolleyes:     :rolleyes:     and now I'm looking out my own arse.

Hopalong:
Yegods, I understand the frustration of dealing with health systems. Any and all. But at least they've showed B that their expertise can upgrade his quality of life a lot. (If the system's cumbersome response doesn't drive him up the wall in the meantime.) You both have the patience of saints, imo.

Do you know any safe and proven herbs you'd suggest for angina? I'm trying hard to balance my need for Rx and my loathing of too many of them. Just had an episode this morning and feel the cardiologist is impatient that I ask for lowest effective doses, but at the same time recognize my resistance to titrating upward (as he'd like) may be irrational. I do have this condition, it's something you can manage but it will not disappear. (Unlike coronary artery things that are surgically fixable, microvascular disease is harder to treat.)

If I take too strong a dose of some things, my BP tanks so much I have no energy. Anyhoo, will hold forth more some other time, wanna get my mind off it. ALMOST took a nitrogycerin tab today but chose an extra dose of isosorbide ER instead. It helped.

High hopes for y'all that the system blockage gets rotorooted out of the way so B gets what he needs, and faster. I sense you worry more about him than yourself, and hope your own health is high on the priority list!

hugs
Hops

sKePTiKal:
Oh hon, having him here is all the medicine I need! Honestly happier & healthier when he's around. I can go all stoic and spartan - or even ascetic - when he's not.

Off the top of my head, I dunno what to tell ya to try for angina, but I can look around and check my references! It's too hot for me to do any outside work, and the studio is off limits till one set of steps is built, so I am looking for things "to do", to stay busy. I've got to repot some of my recent arrival herbs; they're getting potbound and it's too hot to transplant right now... in fact I need to water the beds I plants last week (or more). I think I know which herbs are going to come up as suggestions, but I need to double-check that and make sure, as well as look for undesirable side effects and find some dosage info (which is way more important than most people think!)

It's so hot, I just ordered a couple sundresses I found on sale. The few I have left are either too short or too fitted for this kind of heat. (I only have 3 unless I did save my "little black funeral dress"... sigh.)

And I'll be playing "suzy homemaker" for the next few days. I do have to find something for B & I to do, next Friday/Sat. Amy is on another road trip and asked Hol to stay the night at her place. Hol agreed. I am now also researching protection spells for 150 acres, since I can't smudge that much area. Hol asked her long-time friend to come help "manage" the visit - because S found some work he can go away to do that weekend. Friend will be here and knows Amy from the "old days". I literally suggested I could turn all the lights off and lock all the doors... but I just don't even want to be here. The negative perverse energy is more than I can take.

On second thought, maybe I need to be here to give Hol a respite location and backup; dunno. B will be here; he used to moonlight as a bouncer at bars in Scotland... and that may be necessary experience in this situation. Amy has no interest in visiting or even talking to me, so B will probably stay close to me unless the situation gets out of hand. And MAYBE both Hol & I are simply expecting the worst, based on 25+ years of all our previous experiences, and things won't be as bad as we imagine. But so far, that hasn't happened yet.

Yeah, I'm no contact with her. As much as possible. To keep myself as calm and safe as I can manage. No one wants her here, except Hol who thinks she's going to be able to recreate a relationship with her. And I can understand her wish; but Hol KNOWS I don't want her sister here. She KNOWS how it twists me up.

SIGH. Hol is within her rights to do this, but I don't have to be here. Decisions....

Hopalong:
Amber,
I feel -- a lot -- about your painful estrangement from your other daughter. I'm so sorry you feel the need to be on guard and totally understand it. Hope the visit passes peacefully and doesn't tax you too much at those deep, hurt levels.

Meanwhile, I think this might be the poem Lighter was asking me about a while back. Just popped into my head this might be the one. It is a lodestar for me:

The Peace of Wild Things by Wendell Berry

When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

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