Introverts need that quality to be understood and respected, I agree.
For me, because I live alone without supportive family in my life, being alone too much seems to contribute to or worsen underlying depression. Even though I gravitate to spending my time alone.
I think if I had a partner or family member nearby to watch fireflies with, I would not participate in as many social things. But I don't, and have learned the hard way that if I go without sufficient human interaction, my mental health slides.
It's annoying, often, that choosing which things to invest my time in, feels so like WORK. But if I trudge on and "feel the fear and do it anyway" -- an adequate level of social interaction does in time lift my mood.
Everybody's threshold for just enough, or too much, varies. Ain't no harm in experiementing to find out what level works best for the individual.
Amber, I admire that you've done a deep dive into your own nature for years, and still have love in your life, and select friendships, and family connection too. I remember when you were overwhelmed by Hol's demands, and how skillfully you use assertiveness plus analysis to claim your own oxygen.
OT: I've started to think that part of the reason I let the house's condition collapse this spring was that I was unconsciously building a wall, behind which I was rebalancing. Sure has helped that I now have BN in my life. That friendship is thawing me. I still haven't invited him over and he's put exactly zero pressure on me.
hugs
Hops
There are introverts who can socialize but they decide not to.
Then there are the insecure, unskilled, fearful types who hide out and they also get labeled introverted.
Thing is if someone is or isn't an introvert at the same time social skills have value.
Also I think people are tribal animals and it's unhealthy to be fearfulverted. It's immature to be fearfulverted. Because you see in the case of fearfulvertedness one is not making a choice so much as following the path of least resistance.
It feels like a segment of my brain just fell asleep I took an allergy med. Okay so what am I saying. idk
Spending time alone was forced on me in childhood so I don't know what my "true" nature is. I always defaulted to what was easiest and doing nothing about it was easiest and explaining it away was easiest and lying to myself was easiest.
I'm just surprised that so many people make friends effortlessly.
