Anything

[2cents]

Remember, when someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown. BUT, it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and smack the fool upside the head.

hahahahahahahahahahah!

Brilliant!

[Brigid]

GFN,

Loved all your stats.  Great stuff.  However:

A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (In my next life I want to be a
pig.)

Having bred dogs for years and watched more than a few breeding experiences, it may not be as good as it sounds.  Dogs also have long orgasms (I've seen them go longer than 30 minutes), but after the first 30 seconds of excitement (sounds like some men I know), the penis becomes knotted inside the female and cannot extract until the "orgasm" is complete and the knot shrinks.  I don't know for sure that that is what happens with a pig, but my guess would be that it is not all "fun."

I think the lions may have the better deal.    

Thanks for the laughs.  Great way to start the day.

Brigid

[Anonymous]

Hi all:

Glad so many enjoyed that list of stuff!

Brigid:

....the penis becomes knotted inside the female and cannot extract until the "orgasm" is complete and the knot shrinks.

             

Sounds less than fun!!!  

And if doggie could talk he might say:

  "SSSSSSSSSSomebody!!!!!! Pleaeaeaeaease!!
                                Untie my knot!!!!!"

Thanks for the laugh you've given me!

GFN

[Brigid]

GFN,

You're not far off the mark.  They do actually give you that look of "when is this going to be over."  You also have to keep the female very still as she really wants it to be over and will try to pull away.  This is painful for the male.  As I said--not really that much fun!!    

Brigid

[Anonymous]

With apologies to whoever started this thread, at this point I hope it dies a quick and painless death. Yuck.

mudpuppy

[Portia]

Just one last thought (not mine, pinched):

wouldn’t it be great if human mating was also so painful for both male and female? Then we wouldn’t spend so much time and resources chasing it!

No more porn, no more ‘fashion’, no make up, no preening, face-lifts, no exploitation for sex, no sexual abuse/rape…hey this is getting to be a better idea the more I think about it! No unwanted children!  

Sorry mudpup, it was too good an opportunity to spout off.

[Anonymous]

       

In a pig's eye it should end!   Loved the stat on the pig. Patz

[Anonymous]

Patz,

In a pig's eye it should end!

That's bad enough to be one of mine!

mudpup

[Anonymous]

wouldn’t it be great if human mating was also so painful for both male and female? Then we wouldn’t spend so much time and resources chasing it!

Ya, Portia, and imagine.....the crux of male/female relationships might end up being....communication and other amazing stufff?

Never mind....there would always be those who would use mating as a form of punishment to others.  So no matter what.....there would probably those who would be "chasing it".

And even though I laughed about it , I do feel sorry for the doggies.  That's really not very nice for them, is it?   I do find nature weird sometimes??   Too complicated for me to fully grasp, really.

Sorry too Mudpuppy.  I started this thread (but didn't sign my GFN).  There are lot's of good things here too, if you read back a ways.  No worries if you're not interested.   That's ok too.

GFN

[Portia]

Welcome back GFN, hope you had a good hol

I do find nature weird sometimes??  

Me too, especially the human part of it!

[Anonymous]

Welcome back GFN, hope you had a good hol

Thanks Portia.  I did have a nice, relaxing time.  My mother in law and I took my daughter and 3 dogs to our cabin up north.  It's really lovely there by the river (our place is just a tiny shack but I love it there!!  It's so peaceful and beautiful!).

Anyway....speaking of nature brings to mind all I've seen there, over the years.

First, the amazing, awesome Blue Herons, who step slowly and carefully along the shallows of the river and snap fish so quick you can easily miss it.

A bald eagle!!! (can't even find words for that one...he was so incredible and rare to see).

I once had a disagreement with a porcupine (and I gave in...they're really something to mess with!!).

A Bob cat (who scared the tar outta me while at the same time I was struck with wonder and awe).

A black bear (seen lot's of them but only one young fella, up at that spot).

A mink fishing in winter, who was able to dry himself off (so it seemed) with lightening speed, somehow???  And then dive back in for another mouthfull.  He was truly a joy to see.

The otters....playing and tossling with eachother on the ice....then slipping into the river and bobbing around in a chase.  They are so cute!!!

At least a few hundred beavers, whom I used to like, but now I don't because they keep killing trees and leaving them to rot, for no good reason that I can see.

The mamma snapping turtle that climbs up our bank and lays her eggs in the same spot every single spring.....for who knows how many years????

A snobby skunk who seems to think we humans are not worth his time but who prances by our campfire, every so often, with his nose in the air!!!  Too funny!   And he knows exactly when to come and eat the turtle eggs.

So many, it would probably bore too many for me to keep on.  Nature is confusing and weird but so interesting and wonderous, isn't it?

Human nature?  Not as fun to watch, if you ask me.

GFN

[Anonymous]

GFN,

Sorry too Mudpuppy. I started this thread (but didn't sign my GFN). There are lot's of good things here too, if you read back a ways. No worries if you're not interested. That's ok too.

Yes I know there are lots of good things here. I just had some pretty revolting mental pictures forming from a couple of posts.
Your last post was a little more my style. Sounds like a wonderful spot.
You may have said before, but how old is your daughter?

mudpuppy

[Brigid]

GFN,

So much nicer than painful orgasms (tho not as funny).

I, too, love to go up north in the summer and watch nature do its thing.  The bald eagles are spectacular.  We used to stay on a lake that always had a nest of them up high in a giant pine tree (they come back to the same nests every year).  We were usually there in August so the babies would be quite large, but not yet able to fly.  You could hear them screaming for food halfway across the lake as you would watch the parents soaring over the lake looking for unsuspecting victims.

I'm also a huge fan of loons and love getting up early in the morning when the lake is like glass and watch the mothers swimming with their babies close behind while dad is off hunting.  The calling sound they make to each other is like no other.

This talk makes me anxious for the warm months as I'm waiting for the start of another snowstorm predicted for tonight.  Oh well, just another part of mother nature.

Brigid

[Anonymous]

How about a little change of pace?
My wife and I love old movies. Here's a list of some of my faves.

Musicals,
Tie between An American in Paris and the Music Man
Honorable mention to

Singin in the Rain

and one with Fred Astaire, Rita Hayworth and Adolph Menjou, it had a hilarious script, but i can't remember the name.

Westerns,
Best, The Searchers- John Wayne as an obsessed racist who learns his lesson.
Honorable mention- The Westerner, with Gary Cooper and Walter Brennan.
Westward the Women- Robert Taylor and a bunch of rowdy, strong women.

Drama,
Best, The Night of the Hunter-Robert Mitchum as a bone chilling psycho.
Honorable mention, Gaslight-Charles Boyer as a bone chilling psycho.
How Green Was my Valley-Maureen O'Hara, Walter Pidgeon and that old guy I can never remember the name of. No bone chilling psychos, sorry.

Comedy,
Best, My Man Godfrey-William Powell, Carol Lombard.
Hon Mention, My Favorite Wife-Cary Grant, Irene Dunne-the feisty old judge shoulda got an  academy award.
The Quiet Man-the Duke and Maureen O'Hara in Ireland.
Mr. Blandings builds His Dream House-Cary Grant and Myrna Loy
Bringing Up Baby-Cary Grant and Katherine Hepburn
After the Thin Man-Willian Powell and Myrna Loy
The Batchelor and the Bobby Soxer-Cary Grant and Myrna Loy again.
Oh yeah, To Be or Not to Be-Jack Benny, Carol Lombard.

Special Category,
Preston Sturgess Movies,
Hail the Conquering Hero, The Palm Beach Story and Miracle at Morgan's Creek are my favorites. The guy was a genius.

Last but not least- Best depiction of an N in the movies, all time,
The envelope please- Jimmy Cagney- White Heat. (Wild applause)Probably the greatest ending to a movie in history. Spends the entire movie clawing his way to the top of the gangster world because of his N momma. Gets cornered on top of a huge gasoline storage tank hundreds of feet up. When he sees there's no way out, he shoots a valve on top of the tank while he screams out to his mommy "Made it ma, top of the world!!!" Then of course a giant fireball. Every Ns grandiose, I'll show them, dream come true.

Anybody else love old flicks? If so add to the list or tell me why mine is screwy.    

That post took too long, back to work.

mudpuppy

[Anonymous]

Singin in the Rain was suposed to be underlined not quoted. My mouse sights are a little rusty, I guess.

mud