Anything

[amethyst]

Hi Moira and all:

Hahahahaha!  Those  moments in life do one good thing for us eh?  They give us something to laugh at ourselves about.

Like this poor lady:

Always wear clean underwear in public

Always wear clean underwear in public, especially when working under you vehicle... From the NORTHWEST FLORIDA Daily News comes this story of a Crestview couple who drove their car to Wal-Mart, only to have their car break down in the parking lot. The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car in the lot. The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection, she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones. Unable to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put her hand UP his shorts, and tucked everything back into place. On regaining her feet, she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was standing idly by. The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his forehead.


  Sela

OMG, Sela!! Snort, snicker, roflmao!  Remember that commercial..."parts is parts???"  Love the "p*sed off" story and the emphysema story too.

[Sela]

Hi all:

Ya....those gave me a good giggle too Amethyst.  I don't recall that commercial but there are a few that I do that really are funny.  I used to always say:

"I want that job!!  Sitting in a room, like Dick Van Dyke and thinking up ridiculous commercials!!"

I bet it's hard work too. 

On a more serious note:

The Philosopher

I saw him sitting in his door,
Trembling as old men do;
His house was old; his barn was old,
And yet his eyes seemed new.

His eyes had seen three times my years
And kept a twinkle still,
Though they had looked at birth and death
And three graves on a hill.

"I will sit down with you," I said,
"And you will make me wise;
Tell me how you have kept the joy
Still burning in your eyes."

Then like an old-time orator
Impressively he rose;
"I make the most of all that comes,
The least of all that goes."

The jingling rhythm of his words
Echoes as old songs do,
Yet this had kept his eyes alight
Till he was ninety-two.

~by Sara Teasdale~

Have a great day all!

  Sela

[Sela]

This just reminded me of Ning the N:

The difference between cows and cars:

A wise old farmer went to town to buy a pickup truck that he
saw advertised in the paper for a certain price.  After telling
the salesman which truck he wanted, they sat down to do the
paperwork.  The salesman handed the farmer the bill, and the
farmer declared,

"This isn't the price I saw!"

The salesman went on to tell the wise old farmer how he was
getting extras such as power brakes, power windows, special
tires etc, and that was what took the price up.  The farmer
needed the truck badly, paid the price and went home.


A few months later, the salesman called up the farmer and said,

"My son is in the 4-H and he needs a cow for a project.  Do you
have any for sales?"

The farmer said, "Yes, I have a few cows, and I would sell for
$500.oo apiece.  Come look at them and take your pick."

The salesman said he and his would be right out.

After spending a few hours in the field checking out all the
farmer's cows, the two decided on one and the salesman
proceeded to write out a check for $500.oo.

The farmer said -
"Now wait a minute, that's not the final price of the cow.
You're getting extras with it and you have to pay for that too."

"What extras?" asked the salesman.

Below is the list the farmer gave the salesman for the final
price of the cow:

Basic cow ----------------$500.oo
Two tone exterior------$ 45.oo
Extra stomach-----------$ 75.oo
Product storing
Equipment-----------------$ 60.oo
Straw compartment$--$120.oo
4 Spigots@$10 each---$ 40.oo
Leather upholstery-----$125.oo
Dual horns-----------------$ 45.oo
Automatic fly swatter--$ 38.oo
Fertilizer attachment---$185.oo

Grand total-----------------$1,233.oo


From:  "Voice of the farmer", Rural Roots, January 27, 2004
(A Canadian magazine).

  Sela

[Moira]

Hi all! This Mon. Oct 10th is Canadian Thanksgiving and I just want to list some of the things I'm very thankful for! I'm thankful that my ex N is completely out of the picture- to my mind- and I have no fuzzy warm feelings towards him at all. Am grateful I'm no longer preoccupied 24/7 with homicidal fantasies and up at night pacing the floor- not as if he's losing a minute of sleep! Grateful I have a new job and left a toxic workplace. Grateful I'm clean and sober today and have wonderful healthy support. Grateful I'm meeting non toxic well adjusted people and making new friends. Grateful I can sleep at night and can eat healthily and am starting to gain some weight. Grateful that my depression is much lessened. Grateful that I'm committed to and working daily on getting my shit together and dealing with my issues to break old self destructive choices and patterns. Above all, thankful to all of you for being here and am wishing any other Canadians out there a happy turkey day! Hee hee!!! Hugs Moira

[Plucky]

Happy Turkey Day, Moira!
Make sure to pig out on behalf of all of us who won't get a chance to.  Or at least, who won't have a proper occasion to!
Plucky

[Sela]

Speaking of turkey.....I'm at the library again.

Yes, I cooked a ten pounder (small one) up at our cabin, this past week end, with all the trimmings and the scent drifted out doors and attracted all the neighbours (all 2 of them).  It was quiet and lovely and gorgeous and I have to admit.....I never want to leave there but I usually have to get back and do life (it's not like life up there...it's like....something better).  The leaves were just getting to mosaic stage...all yellows, reds, oranges, pinks, light and dark greens as well as browns, beiges and some mixed up colours in single leaves.  My mil and I gathered arm loads of them to bring home and put in pots on our front steps (our fancy fall displays) and we were careful to avoid those really, really bright red and quite lovely looking poison ivy plants (and there are zillions of them!!).  Making turkey soup of what's left today and that's good bye to another Thanksgiving Turkey feast.  Ta ta!

I'm very thankful for my health, my family, my pets, my nieghbours and many comforts.

Thanks Moira, same to you and all.

  Sela

[Sallying Forth]

The leaves were just getting to mosaic stage...all yellows, reds, oranges, pinks, light and dark greens as well as browns, beiges and some mixed up colours in single leaves.

That is my favorite part of fall, the leaves turning beautiful colors. We've had some gorgeous colors this year in the Pacific Northwest. I've got a tree out my west window which changes everyday. It started with yellows and greens. Now yellows, oranges, pinks and reds. Still a little green. Everyday I go outside and stand on my deck to look at it.

[Sela]

Hi Sally and all:

Oh I love the fall!  It's so beautiful here with all the gorgeous trees.  Good to hear you go out on your deck, Sally, and enjoy that tree every day!    There is a pink tree across the road from our place!!  It's marvelous!  It's also been doing the same as your tree....changing and changing until finally.........it's the most lovely bright pink I've ever seen.  What a wonder!

Enjoy your day all!

   Sela

[Sela]

Can't remember if I've posted this one or not but imo, it's worth re-posting if I already have:

Do It Anyway
 - Author unknown

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway.

Have a great weekend all!

  Sela

[Sela]

A Day in Hell

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with a demon...

Demon: Why so glum  chum?
Guy:  What do you think?  I'm in hell.
Demon:  Hell's not so bad.  We actually have a lot of fun down here...you a drinkin' man?
Guy:  Sure,  I love to drink.  Love the drinks.
Demon:  Well you're gonna love Mondays then.  On  Mondays that's all we do is drink.  Whiskey,  tequila,  Guinness,  wine coolers,  diet tab, and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Guy:  Gee that sounds great.

Demon:  You a smoker?
Guy: You better believe it!  Love the smoking.
Demon:  Alright!  You're gonna love Tuesdays.  We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out.  If you get cancer - no biggie - you're already dead remember?
Guy:  Wow...that's...awesome!

Demon:  I bet you like to gamble.
Guy:  Why  yes  as a matter of fact  I do.  Love the gambling.
Demon:  Cause Wednesday you can gamble all you want.  Craps, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots, whatever...  If you go Bankrupt...well you're dead anyhow.

Demon:   You into drugs?
Guy:  Are you kidding?  Love drugs! You don't mean...
Demon:  That's right!  Thursday is drug day.  Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. or smack.  Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want and if ya overdose - that's right - you're dead - who cares!  O.D.!!
Guy:  Yowza!  I never realized Hell was such a swingin' place!!

Demon: You gay?
Guy:  Uh  no.

Demon:  Ooooh  (grimaces) you're really gonna hate Fridays.




  Sela

[Just a guest]

Just want to share this  


Believe in Yourself
 
    
Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were
meant to be there.  To serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or
help figure out who you are or who you want to become.

You never know who these people may be but when you lock eyes with them, you
know that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way.
And sometimes things happen to you at the time that may seem horrible,
painful and unfair, but in reflection you realize that without overcoming
those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, will
power or heart.

Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of
good luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer
stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small
tests, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere.
Safe and comfortable but dull and utterly pointless.

The people you meet affect your life. The successes and downfalls that you
experience can create who you are, and the bad experiences can be learned
from. In fact, they are probably the most poignant and important ones.

If someone hurts you, betrays you or breaks your heart, forgive them because
they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious
to whom you open your heart.

If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they
love you, but because they are teaching you to love and to open your heart
and eyes to little things. Make every day count.

Appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can,
for you may never be able to experience it again.

Talk to people you have never talked to before, and actually listen. Let
yourself fall in love, break free and set your sights high.

Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a
great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in
yourself, no one else will believe in you. Create your own life and then go
out and live it.

"If you take your eyes off your goals, all you see are obstacles."
 
 
 Butterfly

[Sela]

Butterfly, that was lovely.  Thankyou.

Printing that one out and passing it on too.  Hope all is well with you.



Since today is Rememberance Day.......



In Flanders Fields

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
John McCrae (1872-1918)



Lest we forget.

   Sela

[Sallying Forth]

Thanks Butterfly. I put that one in my journal to read again and again.

[Butterfly]

I'm glad you were blessed by that poem.  I know I was.

Sela wrote:
Hope all is well with you.

I'm just very busy   Thanks for your good wishes, Sela.

Butterfly

[Sela]

Hey Butterfly:

I'm imagining you fluttering all around gracefully like a lovely little butterfly.

Reminds me of a gorgeous metallic blue butterfly that seemed to follow me around as I was gardening at my cabin one summer.  Every time I went to pull a weed or water a plant......there is was......lighting nearby.... waving it's magnificent, ...no....spectacular, shiny blue wings.  Always within a few feet of me.  I called it my "pet butterfly" and I even talked to it ( ).  It was there all summer.  Then it was gone.  I've never seen one like it since.

Glad you still find the time to fly in here Butterfly.

  Sela