Can Ns understand jokes?

[Lara]

Since it was discussed here a week or two ago, that Ns have trouble connecting thoughts and experiences, I've been wondering if this is the reason why my ex didn't 'get' jokes. He would listen, laugh heartily, but when he explained why he thought it was funny, his interpretation of the joke was always different from the obvious one.

Does anyone have any thoughts about this?

Love to all,
Sincerely,

Lara.

[vunil as gues]

My experience is that they can have really great senses of humor, but the humor has to always come from putting someone else down or lifting themselves up.  So basically there has to be someone or some idea they are laughing "at."  Laughing "with" they are less good at.

Both of my parents, and all of my N exboyfriends, were very witty.  But there was sharpness behind the wit, always.  And sometimes the wit could really sting.

So if your jokes weren't obviously tied to his ego, that could be why he didn't get them.

[Anonymous]

My X N had no sense of humor.  This was also noticed by my family members.  He never could get a lot of humor in various sitcoms either.
I think it has to do with his inability to relate to others.


Mia

[Brigid]

Lara,
My experience with my N H is quite the opposite.  He lived by his sense of humor--telling jokes, doing impressions (very good at this), always "on stage."  He did not enjoy the company of people who did not have a good sense of humor and found them to be "flatliners."  I must have heard the same jokes 40-50 times each over the years.  I think he used his humor to hide his insecurities about who he really was.

My N father also loved to tell jokes when socializing with his friends and business associates (never with family).  He was a salesman who was always on the road.  The first time I ever heard him tell a joke was when I was in my 30's and he took my H and I to dinner with a client.  The client convinced him to tell a joke that he was supposedly famous for.  That was the first I had heard of it.

I think they all just hide behind different facades depending on what works best for them IMHO.

Brigid

[mum]

gee, Brigid, your ex sounds like my 2nd husband.  The "show stopping witty repetoire" got a little old to live with.  My first husband and rageaholic dad to my kids, was "funny" but it was always in cutting people down...always sarcastic and hurtful.  His "wit" is limited to whatever springs from defensiveness and hate....or the silliness that comes from being totally drunk.

[promqueencasualty]

My experience is that they can have really great senses of humor, but the humor has to always come from putting someone else down.....  So basically there has to be someone or some idea they are laughing "at...."  

.....there was sharpness behind the wit, always.  And sometimes the wit could really sting.

Vunil, if I could scan a photograph of my Nsister's puss right underneath your quotes, I would----you have no idea how FRIGHTENINGLY spot-on you have described her sense of humor. My Nmother has always jokingly referred to my sister's sense of humor as "quick-witted" and "ascerbic." (I always thought my assessment was more accurate: she's a caustic b**ch!).

My Nsister's yuks ALWAYS come at someone else's expense, and I think that she secretly wishes that she could make her living cutting-down other people(I think that she'd be in hog heaven if someone hired her to do her own radio show for just such a purpose...)!