Author Topic: And Panic sets in....  (Read 5219 times)

vunil as guest

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And Panic sets in....
« Reply #15 on: April 20, 2005, 10:14:32 AM »
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If we are patient enough, these people will make detrimental mistakes that can cost them their jobs. This can be pointed out to them, nicely.


Or better yet, perhaps it could be "accidentally" pointed out to others?    "Wow, I was confused by what [bitch-lady] did, but I know there must be a good reason!  Did you know that she did that? Isn't that funny?  I hope that the school board doesn't find out!  Definitely no one should tell them!"



Not to be machiavellian.  But sometimes one has to be.  And in the end it keeps the bitch-ladies (and bitch-gentlemen) in line, making the world a much better place.

I am tough this morning....  I just would love to see this woman back off of guest...

Guest123

  • Guest
And Panic sets in....
« Reply #16 on: April 20, 2005, 11:07:49 AM »
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. Act so friggin' happy around this person that it's like you are on acid. To help with this, talk to everyone around you when she's around (everyone nice) including children, the friendly custodian, the gerbil in the cage, whoever. Smile so much that your mouth hurts. Laugh out loud. For some reason, nothing unnerves NPD and especially borderlines like someone else's happiness. They want to be around someone who gets upset by them and is rattled by them. I have found that laughter is to these people like garlic to warewolves-- it's amazing.


Vunil....  You have made my day!  I'm sitting here laughing so hard I'm crying.  The bitch is the principal.  I have to go to my daughter's science fair in a couple weeks.  I'm going to talk to everyone...including the gerbil the cage, and I'm going to see myself doing this everyday until the science fair.  I don't even care if they don't smile back!!  They don't agree with her?  Not possible?  Can I borrow your confidence when I walk in there!  Vunil, they avoid me like the plague.  I'm gonna smile so much it makes her sick.  In fact, while I'm there I'm gonna think about this post.  Please write the book!!!!!!   Thank you.

vunil as guest

  • Guest
And Panic sets in....
« Reply #17 on: April 20, 2005, 11:14:22 AM »
Oops, bitch-lady is the principal.  That's ok.  People are then set up not to be crazy about her anyway.  So smile and chat with everyone, happy as can be!

I am so glad to be of help and can't WAIT to hear how it goes :)

We are all there with you....

Anonymous

  • Guest
And Panic sets in....
« Reply #18 on: April 20, 2005, 11:18:30 AM »
Hi Guest123 and everyone:

Principal-god-B has other, higher-up, gods to answer to, in the end.  

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I'm gonna smile so much it makes her sick. In fact, while I'm there I'm gonna think about this post.


Go Gurlie!!  Smile-em to death, as Vunil says!!!

I agree, do write that book Vunil!! :D

GFN

Anonymous

  • Guest
And Panic sets in....
« Reply #19 on: April 20, 2005, 11:19:00 AM »
Hi Guest123,

Sorry about the panic attack. Hope you're feeling better today.

Any chance of transferring tykes to a different school as long as dishonorable dragon lady is breathing fire?

Has the slander campaign effected them with their classmates?

mudpup

Anonymous

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And Panic sets in....
« Reply #20 on: April 20, 2005, 12:08:40 PM »
Guest 123:

This explains a lot......she is the principal.  Everyone else has had some bad interaction with her as well...........and the only way to get by is to be a total suck up.  No wonder when you quit her little apple cart went over.  The ONLY way she can get back is to gossip and say bad things about you.   If you think about it YOU are the one with the power here.  The others at the school still  have to kow tow to her, you on the other hand can come and go as you please.  The others are right, act as happy as a lark when you go to the school.  As the teacher of your children to make sure she contacts you if she needs anything.  Come from a helping point of view and she will be absolutely disarmed.  There is no fighting this.  I did this with my on child when I had issues with the principal.

 If you percieve she is taking things out on the kids, start to document what is going on and then make an appointment with the superintendent  and let nature takes it course.  I will bet they KNOW all about her at the central office as well.  Reputations such as hers travel.  It would be interesting to see if she has been moved from other schools because of this.   I know there is a principal where I live causes such a problem they move her from school to school.   Keep on keeping on.  Patz

Guest123

  • Guest
And Panic sets in....
« Reply #21 on: April 20, 2005, 02:56:25 PM »
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Any chance of transferring tykes to a different school as long as dishonorable dragon lady is breathing fire?


Now mudpup and GFN have me laughing now.  I think you all would have to know her to see why your comments make me laugh so much.  Dishonorable Dragon lady can be very haughty and sometimes condescending. Nothing is a question with her, it's I need this, or get that done by tomorrow, or "I'm going to have to have a word with that teacher, or call that parent and tell them I need them in my office now.  When people are talking about her or to her it's "I'll get that right away" etc. etc.  So hearing her referred to as Dishonorable dragon lady, or Principal-god-B is very funny.  But no, I can't change the school.  I don't have the $$ for a private school.  I do get a break though... my oldest daughter goes to middle school next year, and my youngest starts there a year from September.  Soooo... after June I'm totally and completely free of her for one year.  The year after, my youngest will go there for 3 years.  

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Oops, bitch-lady is the principal


There you go again vunil, I swear I'm going to print this thread and keep it in my pocket for good luck.  

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If we are patient enough, these people will make detrimental mistakes that can cost them their jobs. This can be pointed out to them, nicely


You know GFN, now that I think about it I remember that she told me a long time ago that she use to work in a county closer to home, but had to leave because an incident happened that they didn't like.  She didn't tell me about the incident, but this county is an hour and a half from her home. Looks like she would have learned.

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eat. sleep. bath. walk. yoga. stretch. weights. call friend. call hotline(s). journal. throw things at wall. breathe deeply. mediate. do fingernails. household chores. (come here, now  ANYTHING that i can 'default' to as a positive activity when my brain is losing it on me.


Me too Anna.... think I'll be doing the sleeping thing in a few minutes, and I've created a page on my computer with distractions so if this happens again, I won't have to think, and I'm determined to come through this stronger.

Guys.... yesterday I was feeling really small and today I feel better and taller.  Humor helps, it really helps.   Thanks.

Anonymous

  • Guest
And Panic sets in....
« Reply #22 on: April 20, 2005, 03:14:04 PM »
Yay Guest123!

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I feel better and taller.


keep on!!!

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Humor helps, it really helps. Thanks.


Laughter is the best medicine that I know of.  I can cry for hours but I never feel quite as good as I do after I've had a good laugh!  (That's just me....maybe not everyone is like that).

Thing is.....if you can find a way to laugh at this nimrodNgod, you will take a lot of her power away.  You won't find her as intimidating if you can see her antenas and her scaley green tail (in your head).  She will not be able to make you feel small when you see her as a mouse/ant/microscopic piece of something or other.

See?  It's kind of Nish in itself....but it's not to cause her harm, to put her down, or even to build you up.  It's......protection from the beast!!

A whole different thing with different motives and different goals.  You just want to survive your children's education with this firebreather (good one Mud!!! :D ).  

She, on the other hand.....acts for her own selfish/dragonish/nish/terrified reasons (instills a mediocre-level of terror in order to avoid feeling it herself, maybe????).

I bet you'll find lot's of others who have been burnt by this one, once you start your smiling campaign!!  Go for it!!!:D  :D

GFN

Guest123

  • Guest
And Panic sets in....
« Reply #23 on: April 20, 2005, 08:00:47 PM »
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Thing is.....if you can find a way to laugh at this nimrodNgod, you will take a lot of her power away. You won't find her as intimidating if you can see her antenas and her scaley green tail (in your head). She will not be able to make you feel small when you see her as a mouse/ant/microscopic piece of something or other.


Exactly, and you don't feel intimidated when you are laughing.  Poking fun at your fear.  Making light of it.  I think you are right. She's driven by her own fears.  I don't think she will ever treat others in a way that brings her real respect and friendship, and in that sense I feel sad for her.

promqueencasualty

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And Panic sets in....
« Reply #24 on: April 20, 2005, 09:24:09 PM »
Hi, Guest123--

I agree with everyone else--hold your head high!!!

I also wanted to give you a little word of encouragement. If this is a public school we're talking about, then you really ARE in the cat-bird seat. How do I know this? Well, for starters, I used to be a public school teacher(I quit to pursue my original profession). I am not one to rattle cages, but there is only one god to which the entire public school dinosaur genuflects(if you guessed money, you're on the right path!), and that god is:

The God of Fear(fear of litigation, to be precise)

I read a quote regarding the food chain as it breaks down in America's public schools, and it went something like this: "Teachers are afraid of principals, who are afraid of superintendents, who are afraid of school boards, who are afraid of parents, who are afraid of children(who are afraid of nobody!)."

Now, I know that's a bit harsh, and a lot of parents and students do not deserve such a bad rap---but you get my drift. Please remember this: Cruella is a public servant---she is there to serve YOU---YOUR tax dollars pay her salary, and she answers to YOU(you do not answer to her). Don't take any of her lip---and if you have even the slightest inkling that she might decide to take her nasty attitude out on your children, you might be so inclined to climb into her face and let her know in no uncertain terms that you are on to her, you're watching her, and that if she so much as breathes on your child, then you'll slap her with a lawsuit so fast that she won't know what hit her. In my experience as a former public school teacher, this is the one thing that principals are terrified of, and in my own experience as someone who has had to stand-up to a bully, you have to strike back HARD.

If you do nothing, then people like this (wrongly)perceive you as being "weak," and an "easy target." It's sick, but what you and I perceive as "being polite" or "being the bigger person" these N's interpret as "shark chum." People like this rarely pick-on someone they suspect would be a formidable opponent. My husband and I just went through this with the N-Neighbors From Hell(they moved, thank God! because we stood-up to them---they probably spent a good 30 years tormenting the other people on our street, and we were the first ones who actually had the gall to put them in their place, but I digress). I rehearsed a "script" over and over in my head, should one of them decide to come outside and engage me in a confrontation(my husband and I waged an aggressive campaign of "ignoring" them while acting absolutely giddy every time we were outside in their presence---N's can't stand to see people happy, and they hate being ignored even more!).

These neighbors had a middle-aged daughter who still lived with them, and she lived to scream at people. Usually her unprovoked outbursts were so abusive that the object of her ire would do everything to just get away from her(..until she made the mistake of picking on me!) :twisted: So, one day my husband and I were outside doing yardwork, and this woman came outside for the sole purpose of starting a fight with us. As soon as she opened her mouth, I bellowed out my well-rehearsed, condescending script at her(N's can't stand being patronized!), she retreated to her house, attempting to bark out a comeback but obviously flustered by my unexpected retaliation, and that was the last of it with her(did I tell you that they moved??! I'm sorry, I guess that I can't hear those glorious words enough!) :wink:

Was it hard for me to do?! Absolutely! Was my face beet-red, was my heart pounding in my throat, and did my hands shake the entire 30 seconds? Most definitely-- I am not, by nature, a confrontational person. That's why I rehearsed what I did(think of rehearsing your responses as being akin to conducting "fire drills" for your psyche---when you know you might end up being in a threatening situation, it is always good to have created a plan and rehearsed it dozens of times, so that when the adrenaline kicks-in, you have the clarity to override your emotions by going into "autopilot," following your inner "fire drill." In my case, it was a script that I practiced in front of the mirror(so that I could rehearse my body language as well as my words).

The script that I made-up was specific to that situation and those particular people, so I don't think that it would be of much help to you. But my parting words to this woman were, "you know, I really feel sorry for you." Of course that absolutely freaked her out, but I share these words with you, because I believe that, like my XNneighbor, Cruella is really a pitiable person. People who are compelled to behave this way are usually miserable, and I would be surprised if any of them are actually capable of sustaining healthy, loving relationships or friendships.

Sorry for my rant, Guest123--I hope that my meanderings were of some help to bolster your resolve. Stay strong, and keep us posted!!!

PQC

Anonymous

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And Panic sets in....
« Reply #25 on: April 20, 2005, 10:02:13 PM »
PQC,
You're my new hero. :D
Do you hire out for the bellowing thing?

mudpup