Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
acapella and the other n-partners
bunny:
Jaded,
Don't worry, you didn't do anything wrong.
I_am_mine:
--- Quote from: Jaded911 --- Either way you spell it, she was dismissive and I just really can not tolerate that from anyone again. How do you think Herm felt when she read Sands dismissive statements. How do you think Herm felt when Sand tried to make her look like she had less knowledge then Sand, how do you think Herm felt knowing that all the people on N-partners board read that post, well ya know, we do know Lisa. We know exactly how Herm felt at that time which led to her leaving the board. She felt belittled, stupid,like she did not have the right to speak her mind without being judged, she felt sad because she had to leave a place where she found comfort, she felt she had no voice. We know all the ways Herm felt, because we felt the same damn way because of our N partner.
--- End quote ---
BRAVO, Jaded! Your entire post was very powerful, but I picked out the parts that hit me the hardest. I don't know Herm/bunny, so I hope she will forgive me for talking about her, but Jaded, what you said about how she must have felt - OMG! To search for help, and be attacked in the place that seems like a safe harbor? And the attack is exactly the same kind you're trying to get away from? That would be like an abused wife going to a battered women's shelter for safety, but they leave the door wide open and call the husband up to invite him over.
--- Quote from: Jaded911 --- ... I want to contribute to anyone the self respect they deserve, I wish I would have done it for myself. There are good people out there who stand by their words. I am one of those people and I just can not contribute to anyone who hurts another persons self worth.
--- End quote ---
Talk about empathy! It's so obvious that you've gone thru some hell, but you've really worked on yourself so that never happens again, and you're compassionate enough that it hurts and angers you when you see that kind of hell happen to others. And it's so obvious that you're one of the good people who stand by their words.
I admire you very much, for starting your journey and fighting it thru. I also respect you for being vocal about your feelings on injustices like this, and for taking responsibility for your own words. I like that - in my perception, you're saying "I saw this, it is wrong, here's why it's wrong, I will not accept that behavior, and I won't hide behind twisted words. These are my feelings, my words, I OWN them!" Please correct me if I'm wrong in my interpretation, that's just the feeling I'm getting from your posts.
More honesty, less word games...might have prevented or helped solve the whole situation.
bobbie
Nike:
What Sand does isn't "normal arguing." It's mean and it is narcissistic as all get-out. Lisa, if you don't see this, that's your prerogative. But you are coming up with trivial arguments and expecting others to be convinced. You also ask others to visit N-partners after being abused there. It's not healthy to return to an abusive place. And it's not going to happen because we see the situation differently, and, in my view, more accurately.
Look Herm or Bunny or whoever you are, I"m not here to argue with anyone! I'm just trying to understand what went wrong on MY forum and if you dont like that I'm sorry. Alot of people left that I truly liked alot and I wanted to know why. I could also sense that I was misunderstanding some things and I wanted to be more accurate about my understanding of these things...isnt this what you all are preaching over here? So now you've made me mad. Dont try to take away MY voice either. I'll also ask who the hell I want to return to a board they once loved and that I participate in if I want. I told them POSTS AGO, that I wasnt going to ask them that again and I havent.
CC:
Hello everyone,
I have not visited the site that has been discussed in this thread because I am not involved with an Npartner but I must add this: Whatever this place is that has caused you all so much grief and anger is obviously not a safe place for healing. I don't know if this "Sandahl" is a professional, but I would say that if more than one of you is feeling hurt, betrayed, confused, angry or frustrated, you have most likely been "N'd".
If I may be so bold, my suggestion? Forget about that website, you are safe and cared about here. Time to get on with your healing.
I_am_mine:
--- Quote from: CC ---
If I may be so bold, my suggestion? Forget about that website, you are safe and cared about here. Time to get on with your healing.
--- End quote ---
CC, I have the same feeling about this board, and thanks for your concern for the people who were displaced from the other board. I had just joined a short while ago, and didn't catch the beginning of what happened, but the results didn't leave me with the safe feeling I have always had here. Even tho I don't post a lot, when I do, there's always someone right there to commiserate w/me, give some advice or something that worked from their own experience, and just make me not feel so defective and alone.
This is a great group of caring people.
bobbie
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