Back to Basic--Training (for parents)

[Hollow Cost Survivor]

Wandering with my son through the pet store yesterday, we witnessed the simplest and most perfect form of nurturing/parenting.  After wishing to take home every dog in a cage, I called my son over to observe a mother rabbit and her young.  As the small bunnies sat timidly in the cage, the mom slowly hopped over and gently licked (kissed) one of the bunnies between the ears.  Then, the mom managed to tenderly slide herself down between her offspring and the edge of the cage . There she sat and there I stood. Watching her peacefully nestled up against her young, both rabbit and bunny looked forever content.

It immediately came to me. This is all a parent really needs to do---pure and simple. Even a N can do this...ya think?  Maybe if any parent, including N and N victim, would just nurture a child instead of raise them, perhaps nature would take it's course and generations would improve? I have often wondered how the growing awareness of a N population can be healed effectively, around the globe.  A creative life-plan is needed to help resolve such a huge dilema.  Good therapy can work... but if a N won't go to therapy, then the responsibility falls only on their victims.  How about this idea?...just food for thought.

We all know pets are therapeutic...but, given the respect they have earned, can they heal the world? I think a worldwide healing pet store chain needs to be developed...for this specific cause...PARENTAL TRAINING.
We can call it something like---  Virtue-All * Pet-Turn-All. The theme would be observation for practical training. (It's us humans that need the training, not the instictive animals)

Anyone want to go into business?  I know I'm going to pay more attention as I practice this in my home.  I think I'll document and observe the results.  A little far-fetched and over-simplified for reality? But, what other way can one appeal to the masses about such a problem? Anything is worth a try. Comments welcome.

[Anonymous]

It's a great idea........but not everyone reacts as sweetly as you do to this scene. An N could easily find some problem with it, or not even notice it. Sorry to be a sopping wet blanket. Your idea is a beautiful one.

My feeling about parenting is, the LESS a parent overreacts, retaliates, objectifies, overidentifies with, exploits, and projects their own crap on a child, the better off a child is.

bunny

[mudpuppy]

Hi Hollow,

I'm not sure I grasp the entire concept but this is what came to my mind.

If that rabbit you were watching had NPD, it wasn't nurturing its offspring, it was watching you out of the corner of its eye thinking,
 "Look at at that stupid person. Here I'm licking this stupid little brat of a rabbit just to present a facade as a good mother to the world and she's buying it. What a dope. I am so obviously superior to that twit; I just wish I didn't have to lick this smelly little rabbit to fool everybody."

On the other hand, a person with NPD watching this rabbit is thinking,
"I hope everyone in this store thinks I'm good looking. I'd like to have sex with that salesgirl over there. Why do people treat me so mean and awful when all I do is tell outrageous lies about them? How can I get out of paying child support? Why should my siblings inherit anything, when I am so much better a son than them? That cute little rabbit is very plump; I wonder if I should buy it and eat it for dinner?"

I'm not sure you're idea is too practical considering the nature of NPD.
Too bad though, its a sweet idea.

mudpup

[mum]

Mudpup, you crack me up! Very funny.  My ex would be thinking those things...and acting on some of them too!!!!

Hollow: I love what you are saying.  Such a loving heart!

Maybe if any parent, including N and N victim, would just nurture a child instead of raise them

Oh, how I wish my ex knew this. He frequently talks about "raising "the children...how ironic.

Bunny:

My feeling about parenting is, the LESS a parent overreacts, retaliates, objectifies, overidentifies with, exploits, and projects their own crap on a child, the better off a child is.

Soooo smart and right you are.  Could you transplant this into my ex's head, please???

[Serena]

Anyone who ever sees a giraffe, horse, dog, cat or rabbit react to their 'newborns' is swept away by how LOVING, kind, gentle and compassionate the Mothers are.

I recently spent a morning on a sheep farm and watched lambs being born, lambs being nurtured and a special 'stall' for 'non-responsive' mothers.  They were held (humanely) in stalls so that the lambs could 'suckle' but the 'mother' couldn't turn violent on them (or even see their 'face')...........

Brought back a ton of memories.  My mother provided me with the best that money could buy - LOVE was a different matter.

I'm overjoyed that I have arrived at a point in my life where I see her as a cardboard cut-out.... elderly, frail but no less malevolent.

[Hollow Cost]

Hi Everyone,

I knew your posts would intrigue and entertain me with new perspectives. I never would have thought about those NPD comments or an NPD rabbit.  I suppose you're right, but what if even just one/two percent of this specific population could see and experience something they never saw or felt before? What affect could occur from them witnessing the animals being loving and non-threatening?... to them, too. One moment could make a difference? It would be interesting to survey. Don't you think?

But, maybe that rabbit was protecting her young from all us onlookers, or maybe, just maybe, what I think is...she was a mom loving her young.  
My last thought is that I think the pet store should only work with young pets and their mom/parents.  It seems that the animal's nurturing would most obviously occur in the developmental stages of their young. As the babies grow older,  it would be time to find them a loving home and family...living the life they were meant to have. You could almost always count on new moms and babies to instinctively repeat this process. How wonderful this would be in the human world!

After thinking about my own post, I thought someone might comment on this fact. Had I not grown up in such an abusive/voiceless home, this might not be so interesting to me.  I would have understood nurturing to be just that.  Maybe those lucky people visiting the store, the ones who were nurtured young, could see how lucky they are. I hope my son felt lucky...or didn't have to think about it at all.

[Stormchild]

After thinking about my own post, I thought someone might comment on this fact. Had I not grown up in such an abusive/voiceless home, this might not be so interesting to me.  I would have understood nurturing to be just that.  Maybe those lucky people visiting the store, the ones who were nurtured young, could see how lucky they are. I hope my son felt lucky...or didn't have to think about it at all.

I take such tremendous joy from exchanging love with my animals, that if the only reason I can feel that joy is that my parents didn't love me, then I am glad they didn't.

I'd rather be unloved and have feelings, than be 'lucky' and totally blind, deaf, and numb, if those are the only two choices. Thank God, I know they're not .

I know this isn't what you meant, H.C., but I've seen some of those unthinking, unfeeling, 'lucky' people... and I promise you, we'd all be better off if they thought and felt.

But what a sweet idea. Did you know that pets have successfully reached and taught some very hardened criminals?