A pat on the back

[el_Thom]

I would have liked to have done something like therapy before I went out and did all my background reading, but unfortunately, that costs money, which is something that is far too sparse.

The saying isn't true.  Talk is not cheap.

Fortunately, I have a great girlfriend who encourages me to rant for half an hour about the things that bother me, and only charges me dinner and a movie or flowers every once in a while.  I'm just scared that she's doing it out of a sense of obligation, and not because she really wants to hear it.  I fear that if I take her up on it too often, she's going to start to resent having to listen to my problems every day.

That's why I'm glad I've reached somewhere where people will listen to and analyze me for free.  I appreciate all the different views, and would just like to commend everyone in this forum for:

1) Sharing their own experiences so that others can learn from them

and

B) Giving honest advice based on knowledge rather than just a whole lot of "common sense."

[CeeMee]

Okay, El Thom, now you've completely blown me away.  I was just telling Bloopsy on another post how she has so much more sense than I did at 30 and now you tell us you are only 18. 

You are the one deserving the pat on the back.  Most kids at 18 aren't EVEN looking up their diagnosis or personality flaws on the internet.  Wow.  at 18, I truly thought the world was crazy and I was the only sane one.  If I'd started my journey back then, who knows where I could be by now.  Congratulation to you.  I'm in awe!  You have just given me hope for our world's future 

CeeMee

[el_Thom]

You have just given me hope for our world's future

Oh, Lord, please don't let me do that.  Our future is fairly doomed.  I think my early realization of personal problems is a result of two factors.

The first is that I was aware at an extremely early age.  I remember being kicked in the groin by my cousin on my second birthday, and remember almost every moment of being almost 3 and picking out a puppy (which I still have and is turning 16 in January).  At the age of 6, I started developing personal philosophies.  I lost total faith in God, got it back, lost it again, and then decided that it was impossible to know either way.  I made every attempt to mature in hopes that it would help my situation, but it might have made things worse.  I couldn't talk to anybody about anything that was important to me.  After all, what normal second grader wants to have a conversation on the statement "I think, therefore I am?"  (which, by the way, I decided I didn't buy, because that can only apply to one person, and doesn't explain the existence of others).

Secondly, it's not that I don't think everyone else is crazy.  I know everyone else is crazy, so why should I be exempt from this assumption?  I just know the only person I can really try to fix is myself.  I'm my own worst critic, and I figure if I can be the same type of crazy as everyone else, maybe I'll be a bit happier with life.

Either way, thanks for the compliment.

[October]

You have just given me hope for our world's future

After all, what normal second grader wants to have a conversation on the statement "I think, therefore I am?"  (which, by the way, I decided I didn't buy, because that can only apply to one person, and doesn't explain the existence of others).

As far as I understand it, that was never intended as a proof statement.  More of a foundation upon which to build, because without a foundation nothing will stand. If you use it in this way, then you can build a whole world upon it, or at least a whole philosophy.  If you take it away, then the whole world, and our every experience, crumbles to dust.

We all have a version of this.  Mine happens to be God, whatever that might mean.

 

[CeeMee]

El Thom

You were self aware at an early age and you understood you had the power to change yourself.  Again, I'd say that's amazing.  I don't meet many teenagers who have that level of awareness.  Maybe it's the teenagers I've been hanging around with

On the face of it, things may appear pretty doomed, but I am still hopeful, and when I read some of the posts on this board, that hopefulness is reinforced. 

On another thread we are talking about spirituality.  I'm just ventruing into this area and have a very strong pull towards Buddhist philosophy.  A basic principle of this philosophy is that we can change our world through human revolution.  It starts with each of us recognizing that the road to peace and happiness starts within.  Change is what many on this board are about.  It sounds like you are too.  This is why I am hopeful and don't believe we are doomed. 

(Although I'd agree that we are certainly headed in the wrong direction at the present time but life has a way of cycling.  Things should be on the up again soon.)



CeeMee