Dissociative Identity Disorder

[Bloopsy]

Anyway I finally got my diagnosis of DID, which is sort of relieving becuase I knew it anyway but no ne ever believed me or took it seriously, but at the same time I feel really scared. I don't feel like telling my friends or family because I feel like they either won't believe it or won't care or go into a big story about why they think they have it too and expect me to be all sympathetic but toatally forget that I need support too and it is not ALL ABOUT THEM those fuckheads. In other words I feel very alone and just am writing here to tell you guys and maybe get some support from my friends here or something because I feel sort of scared hopeless and alone while also being relieved that finally someone believes me and it is not my fault.

[Hopalong]

I believe you, Bloopsy. I don't know what DID is, but I'm going to go read about it so I can understand.
Knowing about it or not, I can tell how brave you are.

Hopalong

[Cadbury]

I think that my response is almost exactly what hopalong wrote so I have replaced it all with :

DITTO

Hugs to you Bloopsy

[Healing&Hopeful]

I believe you, Bloopsy. I don't know what DID is, but I'm going to go read about it so I can understand.
Knowing about it or not, I can tell how brave you are.

Hopalong

I have to say ditto too..... I shall be back when I've read up on it xx

[Bloopsy]

you guys are the best!!!!!!!!!! It means the world to me that you would go and read about DID to understand. Thank you
((((((Cadbury)))))))(((NPD Dad))))))))(((((((((Hopalong))))))))))
xoxoxo bloopsyrose

[October]

(((((((Bloopsy)))))))

Well done on achieving the diagnosis you needed.  You are such a strong person; you are an example to us all!!

If you find yourself a little up and down over this; happy one minute, crying the next, don't be surprised.  You may have to grieve over this, as well as knowing that it will help.

I have dissociative symptoms too, so I know how distressing they can be.  As far as I know I don't have DID, but who knows?  But I am on the same spectrum as your good self.   

[Healing&Hopeful]

Hiya hon ((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))

Here is the info I read up on it http://www.sidran.org/didbr.html

It is a very real disorder, often diagnosed wrongly so I really do hope that now it's been diagnosed correctly, you can get the right kind of help.  The best thing I read is that it can be treated which, from reading about a lot of personality disorders, I was really glad to read this.

I feel that this is the time for you, regardless of what your family think or their reactions.  It's understandable feeling scared hon and I feel anyone would feel the same in your situation, however I do feel this is the start of something very positive for you in the long run.

Take care. xx

[Cadbury]

I read a different site, but was glad to understand it a little more. I think you are so brave Bloopsy to be working through this. I agree with the fact that you should be a little selfish right now and worry about yourself. Don't be concerned about what others will say or do... you are important here.

Take care and you are doing so well ! (((((((Bloopsy)))))))

[Hopalong]

I read the link NPDDad sent and could not agree more with her "time for you" message. You are BBD, Bloospy.
Brave Beautiful Determined.

You will get there, and not alone, either.
Hopalong

[Bloopsy]

 I am among the third category of people, whose prognosis is the least good, ie those with substance abuse problems who are still enmeshed with thier abusers however I am recovering in AA and trying to get away from my family so soon I will make it into another group or something. Anyway, thank you for being so nice and kind that means a lot. i am so upset when I told my twin sister she just sort of didn't even give me a hug and then 2 minutes later she wlked awsay and was like I am tired. I was so hurt but ended up comforting her whatev. I know it is because she has her own problems but so do I and when she told me she had BDD I was nice and read about it and talked to her. Whatev. I don't need to be treated like it doesn't matter that I have a horribl,e problem , like it is all a matter of whatev with everything.

[Hopalong]

Chosen family.
Support groups.
So very very often our blood relatives just can't meet us where we need to be met.
But you are still loved...and I am so sorry for the pain you're in.

Hopalong

[Marta]

Hi Bloopsy,

How did you get your diagnosis? Do you have a new T?

I have come to be a firm believer in self-diagnosis, because there is so much negligence out there in the world, that if you got the diagnosis which resonates with you, it has to be the right one. As for your sister, it seems like folks around you do take you for granted. I don't know much about your sister. Does she live with you and your mom? Is she close to the mom? Is she nice to you overall? It DOES matter that you have problem. Dont let anyone make you feel otherwise.

Love, Marta

[Plucky]

Hi Bloopsy,
I am happy you got something that represents progress, though I am clueless as to what it means and about to click on the website to alleviate that.  You are extraordinary, resilient, and wonderful.
Remember that you do not need the approval or understanding of others to do what you want or be who you are.  So if you sense they will not be understanding, there is no reason to tell them or to seek their understanding or approval.  You don't need it.  They can only be harmful to you if they are going to deny the truth or try to turn the spotlight to themselves.  So bypass the urge to reveal your happy news to everyone.
My very best wishes.
Plucky

[Bloopsy]

oh my it is so nice to read you guys' notes. I feel like I am very lucky to have all this support--- that makes it hard to feel sorry for myself---thank god!!!!! LOL!!! I feel like I have to take the time to read the notes over becuase I am sort of speedy right now or something. I don't have to try to go to my famioly anymore because it hurts me and probably them too not that that is actually my problem---- but still it is not a good thing to have going on anyway, I don't like it---- even though I don't think I am thatmean or anything, but so much water under the bridge!!!!!!!xoxo Bloopsyrose

[Sallying Forth]

Hi Bloopsy,
I believe you! Your diagnosis will help you understand so many things about your life both past and present. And you will heal. Be patient it will take time. Therapy for DID is longer because it is more complex. And you will heal -- that bears repeating.

I diagnosed myself with this disorder when it was called MPD or Multiple Personality Disorder back in the 1980s and 1990s before any therapist did. I read a book called When Rabbit Howls and had a revelation. I knew that book was about me and I had even more parts than the author (she had 92). A woman from my Adult Child of Dysfunctional Family support group told me about the book. Anyway I had a lot of behaviors, which were typical indicators of this disorder, from a very early age.

It wasn't until 5 years later that I started to get the help I truly needed in order to heal. The previous therapists knew very little about MPD/DID so they were more of a hindrance than a help. Some were even down right dangerous in their handling of my alters. I didn't realize this until years later.

For me, it was difficult to stay in therapy at times because of my parts wanting to leave. They didn't want to address the issues at hand and felt leaving was their only option. However I stayed in therapy inspite of those reluctant, wayward parts. Thirteen years with the same therapist is unusual for MPD/DID clients but I am still here and nearing the end of my therapeutic journey. Then a new journey will begin.


I wanted to add that DID is a creative, intelligent and protective strategy which helped you survive an abusive and traumatic childhood. Congratulate yourself on your ability to survive what happened to you as a child. Give yourself a big hug, you deserve it.

Hugs to you, (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Bloopsy)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))