Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > What Helps?

How do you protect yourself from a dangerous N?

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Me:
Just had another thought, and then I am going to walk and experience some nature.

An abuser intimidates. Boy are they good at it! They use anything and everything and everyone in their power to intimidate in order to get their way.  There are no limits to what they will do.

Some abusers kill. Some stop short of that.

The problem is, you do not know where their limit is because they do not know that themselves! 

Therefore, it is best, IMHO, to make the assumption of no limits and protect yourself legally, emotionally, and physically. 

Sheela:
In adding to this excellent thread, i wouls like to add that appealing to a Higher Power if a great way to find inner peace. True, an abuser can go to great lengths and sometimes an N can get carried away . . .evasive actions via detachment and distance are worth the loss of property, worth the immediate sense of winning, etc . ..

if a lawyer doesn't believe you, find another lawyer, if your family or friends won't support you, find someone who will (A therapist)

no court can talk away your life or force you to engage directly with a N if you don't want to  . ..

we need tocan learn to believe that our inner strength, that our desire for good is stronger than any dark force conveyed by an N's threats . . .

everytime I was spat on, everytime i was abused i called the police  . . .(spitting is violation of one's person, and therefore it is a prosecutable instance of abuse, since abuse is defined as violationsof one's person. my lawyer advised me of this . . . ) which really did manage the behavior of my abusive spouse, a rather florid NPD. I was calm cool and insistent that the authorities act (don't be cowed by their initail reaction, most people are naturally structured to deny the existence of domestic abuse,) and they did, in the long run  . . .act, at least enough to mitigate the worst behavior

i personally felt I was being called upon to summon greater strength, greater fortitude and faith than I had ever thought myself capable  . . .

after a while he went on to find other wives, but they ended up leaving him also  . . .

reallyME:
Whipped,

I have nothing real new to add here to this very accurate info, but I will say that I knew Jodi was done with me when I stopped corresponding with her and she stopped and moved on to the next victim.  You'll know he's done when the harassment ends.

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