Hello, I am new here. I feel great to have found this board while googling characteristics of an N. I have been depressed and angry at every area of my life. I'm trying to make small changes everyday and be more positive and proactive.
I have many stories to post later on. I been a victim of my N family: two brothers and parents and possibly other relatives. On some days I sometimes feel N towards my boyfriend, his family, friends, and myself. I always tell him to leave me but that's another story, he assures me he's never wanting to leave me b/c he loves me so much. I don't fulfill all characteristics of an N.
This is really hard for me to move on and this just happened last October and I can vividly remember everything. My N brother and N mother tried to force me to sign a house loan. A house loan for over 200K. He actually had several loans to pay off: car, school, and a mortgage. So one evening, a real estate agent came over to the house to talk over with my N mother and N brother about a possible lead. While I heard every word and was cooking in the kitchen, the real estate agent asked me if I had a solid credit history. I felt so dumb to reply I did and did not ask her why she is asking me. Once she knows my credit score is high, she told my mother and talked. Then my mother asked me to co-sign the loan. I did not know it was a loan but there was over ten pieces of paper. The real estate agent was acting very nice and sweet to my mother. I always know my N mother fakes everything she says and she is so over-the-top sweet, too, and remains loyal about the papers without telling me anything that it was a loan. OK, I signed it. However the next few days, my N brother did not win the bid for the house b/c another buyer bidded higher than them so the papers were shredded. On another evening, the real estate agent came back with another lead. This time I locked myself in my room and was talking to my boyfriend about this matter. His mother is scared and worried for me and warned me not to sign anything this time. My N brother & N mother came knocking on my door and asked me to sign the loan again. This time I said no. He threatened he'll take my computer away and my N mother threatened to take my car away so I couldn't go to work. They were even mumbling under their breath that I know nothing of the papers and kept saying to me it is not a loan, it is just approval papers for a loan, etc. blah blah. They tried every which way to threaten me while the agent heard all of it. I held my foot down and kept saying no, no, no and yelled, please show me respect for my wishes. I can always use the library for a computer. I can call the police. I can sue you. When I said sue, my brother would say that I can't sue them if I signed the papers. Such bs!! The agent would then say to them to stop hassling me about the loan and just leave me alone, it's my decision, etc. I mean why the hell won't my mother sign it?? I bet she didn't want to pay for the loan if my brother defaulted. Such bs!! And no apologies whatsoever!! Not even another word and they finally left. My heart was pounding. I told my bf about everything that's happened. Minutes later, my half-N Dad came by my door and knocked. Suddenly, I was overwhelmed with fear and didn't respond until a few minutes later when he continued to knock. My Dad quietly told me that those papers are not good and that it's a loan and tells me not to sign it. I said thank you! I was relieved b/c they tried to force my Dad to sign it too!!!
I told my close friends about it and they were pretty angry how low they can can go. I remember they exploited me financially many times and I won't forget that. I thought they would show me love if I did signed it, but nada. Knowing that I did not have the income to pay a loan, I also told my younger N brother about it. Surprise! He also was almost forced to sign a loan and he only has a minimum wage job. This N brother is handicap so no explanations were given when he was given the papers to sign. Such bs!! The following day, though, my younger N brother brought up the loan matter to my N mother. She became very angry and yelled at him and me, saying we were dumb and should have listened to her and blamed its our fault that they lost the bid, blah blah. Whatever, it's not a clever response either. I tried to express my opinion and said I learned it was a loan from a friend. She said everything I say is a lie and that I know nothing. She just kept on talking and talking as if she did not hear me and my brother. She can't hear any word of emotion, period. It's scary to see her expressions and words of evil. She even blames me the most for her problems i.e. depression. Yeah right! Whatever! If I kept some papers in the past and not have shredded them b/c they owe me money, then I'd have a right to sue.
Sorry for the long rant. I may have some bad grammar, lol
and should have simplified the post.
