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Hi all!

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phoenix:
bye

seeker:
Hi Phoenix,

Your story has stayed with me all week.  It's so incredible and mind-blowing.  I don't know what chord it is striking within me for it to stay with me, but it is.

At first I was confused that your grandmother would change her will if she knew the way her son is built, but then perhaps your grandmother felt compelled to change it because he may have had some leverage, if he was taking care of her in her advanced years.  He may have blackmailed her in this way to get her to put your money in his control.  I'd be pretty ticked at Grandma otherwise.  This is elder abuse by the way.

After rereading some of your stories on different threads, I wonder if it isn't your very independence that threatens him more than anything else.  He had to find a way to tie you to him.  Responsibility=independence=threat. He already knows he has your sister through her irresponsibility and addiction.  He probably feels pretty confident she'll always come back around sooner or later and spend all the money lickety-split.  (And it's great NS: look at my troubles!!!)  But with you, good behavior or not, it is the fact that you insist on being separate that threatens him so.  He could not face the total and utter rejection of that (in his mind).  And he knows you have what it takes, so he had to resort to very drastic measures to keep control of you.  So weird, because the tighter he pulls, the more you want to get away.  

The image that just came to my mind (hope you don't mind me thinking out loud here) is the tug-of-war between you both.  It stops when one of you lets go.  I hear you say you are working on that, phew!   :wink:  

You are very, very brave to try and find a way out of the tangle and not to count on getting your inheritance.  At first I was tempted to say fight him, fight him all the way!  But the most valuable thing one can have is freedom and the ability to make it on one's own, inheritance or no inheritance.  I thought a few of the previous posts were a little cavalier, but after mulling it over a bit, perhaps this is really the way out.  

Good luck Phoenix.  As for myself, I hope I can figure out why your story has wrapped itself around my brain.  There's a lesson for me here as well.
Best, S.

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