do you believe in laziness?

[WRITE]

Celebrating the deliciousness of clutter with you, Write!

I read this earlier ( it was ina  pile of clutter! )

One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.

I looked up some more AAMilne quotes:

Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it is not all mixed up

That's what I do all wrong!

[Brigid]

One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.

This happens to me frequently when I clean out closets (I don't frequently clean out closets--wouldn't be making discoveries if I did--but often find things in there that I forgot I had).  Sometimes I find Christmas gifts or decorations that I purchased in the off-season, but forgot about (usually it is too late to use them, but fun to find anyway  ).

 

It did upset me as a child the way we were expected to clean things which weren't dirty, and the way a room looked like no one had ever spent five contented minutes in there...

I have always hated going to a home where the rooms look as though they should be roped off as part of a museum.  When we would visit my ex-IL's home, they had stark white carpeting in their LR and I always just walked to the edge and looked in--couldn't get myself to actually enter the room.  I have always strived to have my homes look lived in and loved.  If I was expecting guests, it would be clean, but if you dropped in unannounced, you can be sure there will be some dog hair on the floor, probably some slobber which has been flung onto a kitchen cabinet or wall (I'm still buying the theory that dogs' mouths are cleaner than ours) and "important" papers stacked on the kitchen counter.

A busy mess is better than idol tidyness. 

Shanny, those are words to live by.

Brigid

[Certain Hope]

oooo Brigid !  Maybe we should all go clean out our old handbags! Imagine the lost treasure just waiting to be rediscovered 

[Plucky]

I think it is possible to be lazy and happy.  I know that in my FOO laziness was the ultimate curse and insult, and we were working our butts off from dawn until dusk.  To this day I cannot stand to see silver because ours had to be polished every week, whether it needed to be or not.   
I also know that the inner messages to do everything perfectly paralyze me at times.  Or drive me to excess in the other direction. 
To sum up, laziness can be a good thing!  At least lazy people know how to relax, something I have yet to learn.
Plucky

[gratitude28]

Well....
This is one of my HUGE issues, of course, coming from a dump. As I said in another email, for many years, I was out to prove that I was better than my parents. So I tried to keep my house spotless as an "example" of what a house should look like... hmmm... I guess that's a passive-agressive way to tell the person you are pissed at him, eh???
I am never comfortable with my house no matter how tidy it is. I have a person in once a week who helps me clean... and I try to do some every day and especially any mornings I am home. I never rest in the house. I am always freaked out when someone comes in b/c I think they will find my house less than perfect.
Truthfully, it's not that bad... but I am like the anorexic looking in the mirror and seeing a fat person... I want to enjoy my life, and this is one area where I can't lately.
Thanks for the topic write.
Love, Beth

[WRITE]

there's a lot of psychology deep-down in this isn't there.

I have been ruminating on it all week, and I know a lot of my issues run deeper than I realised.

My father's controlling and whining; my mother's loathing of her home and family; my husband's projecting of his neurotic parents & refusal to assist with anything.

My son is perfectly normal- gloriously unbothered by clutter or tidiness. Stuff just is. Maybe I can learn from him.

On a practical level I went out and got some very pretty boxes from Hobby Lobby etc and I am starting to at least disguise some of it.

Whilst typing this I had a mental image of a friend coming to help me clean, maybe I can ask one of my friends sometimes and I'll get dinner as a reward! It did make me incredibly sad during my marriage that there was never that partnership and fun about organising for something or doign chores together 

[Certain Hope]

Dear Write,

  My son is perfectly normal- gloriously unbothered by clutter or tidiness. Stuff just is. Maybe I can learn from him.

        mine, too... ain't it wonderful? He does keep his playstation games in fine order, tho... 

Love,
Hope

[Hopalong]

Hi...
My aversion to paperwork has extended (this is humiliating to admit) to paying bills late, which is beyond foolish. There were times in my past when even though I had the money I was so math-phobic and anxious about managing it that I would let things slip through the cracks.

I've been going through another bout of that recently...first in a looooooong time. Tomorrow is the day I have to catch up or risk credit slippage.

Please send me strength and focus for the task.
(I have let it build until it's overwhelming.)

thanks,
Hops

[Plucky]

Hi Hoppy,
I totally understand. Try this.  First make sure you have eaten and if possible be alone. Only take out the bills you absolutely need to pay tomorrow.  Then get everything you need together - envelopes, stamps, online passwords, etc. Then get a nice drink of tea or whatever, and put something pleasant on the radio. Then park yourself in your matchy matchy room, or wherever you have a good place for it, and do not get up until it is finished.  Then go directly to the post office, if you have to post something.  Do not think too hard about it, just do it.  No analysis neccessary.

I'll spare you my own tales but it works for me.
Plucky

[Hopalong]

thanks, Plucky.
I have to break it down into smaller steps...you're right.

I may even make a list of the steps. Sounds childish but that may be what I need.

thanks again,
Hops

[moonlight52]

 I have a lot to do at my house .The regular household chores and cleaning and getting rid of clutter I do at my own pace.

Lucky for me I have loved ones that do not mind the clutter when it starts to pile up a little. Because of recent surgery and my arm giving me trouble.I am getting extra help and understanding.

The real work is needing some home repairs.Talk about change we are planning to move so there is lots to do before hand.We are all happy and are looking at new homes .This will bring so much happiness for our family.

So it seems we have changes all round my inner world of freedom and our family preparing for a new home.
Write your son sounds mellow .He is about the same age as my little one.My smallest d is so very Sweet and gentle.She has taught me the importance of treating loved ones tenderly.

Moon