Dear Beth,
I hear you! You were way ahead of me in recognizing this. I wasn't even aware of how much "me" was involved in my efforts to communicate. Way back, when I first got online years ago in Christian chat, I thought I was being all self-less and helpful and eager to be involved in leading other people out of darkness. Truth is, I was so thrilled with my newfound ability to communicate with the freedom available in that sort of anonymous, non-threatening setting, I got totally puffed up with pride and arrogance. Whew... did I ever think I knew it all. Well, that illusion has long since evaporated, but still... I struggle daily with putting aside my own expectations for others and learning to be able to receive from them (along with giving) despite our many differences. I slip regularly, but always I'm brought back to that prayer by St. Francis, (it's been posted a couple times here in the recent past)... asking to seek opportunities to give, not to receive, and especially ~ not so much to be understood, as to understand. This is going a long ways toward enabling me to know when to speak... and when to hush, not because I think I'm better than anyone else, but because understanding (and timing!) is everything.
Dear Write,
there aren't nearly as many clear-cut big answers as we'd like to believe That's the truth!
I suffered from tunnel vision long enough to know that it's a severe debilitator and crippling to relationships which, the way I look at things now, can only thrive on openness to receive at least as much as we're eager to give. I never again want to be so thoroughly involved with myself that I fail to receive what even a perceived "enemy" has to offer. It's come to my attention that we can often learn the most from those who cause us the most distress. Big lessons here in a short time, but I am very grateful.
Love,
Hope
