And now for something completely different

[steve]

Hello my friends. I decided to share a story with you. I think it is quite interesting.

Lately, I have found myself becoming stronger and stronger by the day. I have finally found myself and it feels great. I have learned that other peoples opinions are nothing. They start as nothing and can only become what I create from them. No longer do I feel embarrassed or anxious. It really doesn't matter. Let me explain how it changes your life.

I have an acquaintance who for some reason sees me as a threat and often makes demeaning remarks. I am sort of like his dumping ground for unwanted garbage. You all know that feeling. Well, I ran in to him today and it seems like today was trash day. So he fired off a remark. Before, I would have had some negative feelings and a reaction to the comment. But today was very different.

Inside of me, all I could think was the following: Look at that fool who thinks that his opinion matters to me. Look how foolish he looks in his weak attempt at power. It was almost like a child was trying to be funny but didn't know how. From a situation that would have in the past created negative in me, now all it created was a sense of how stupid some people can really be. Pathetic is more the word, and I am above that, for now and forever.

Steve

[Ami]

did you have some "transcendent" experience, Steve, like a near death experience--in order to transform so much?                                                      Ami

[isittoolate]

I doubt that, Ami.

It's a matter of forgetting about oneself and looking 'into' the other person to see what he/she is all about.

If we always have ourselves on our minds we can never see what the other person is all about. We listen, look and discern.

Way to go Steve!!!! Good going!!

Izzy

[bigalspal]

Steve,
Wow! I'm like Ami. Did you just one day wake up & say to yourself that TODAY was going to be different, or was it a slow realization? I'm not there yet, but I'm glad you are.
Good for you!
Bigalspal

[steve]

Izzy:

I disagree. It is all about yourself. You see, once I have accepted myself, then no other's judgement affects me. It pales in front of the ultimate judge which is myself.

Where I think we can agree is that once you have internalized that, you no longer concern yourself with the judgements of others and instead they become much more visible to you. Relative to your old way of approaching the world, everything now moves in slow motion. When you don't need to busy yourself with your own struggle about what a person means and what it means to you, these people start to become almost like caricatures. It is hard to explain, but when you see it, you will know what I mean.

Steve

[isittoolate]

That is what I said steve without getting into comic books.

[steve]

Izzy:

I wasn't very much in to comic books either. I guess I just misunderstood you. I suspect you see what I see.

Steve

[isittoolate]

the only way that we could have misunderstood one another is:

I said "If we always have ourselves on our minds --that would be "fixed" or not fixed from trauma.

You said" It is all about yourself" that would be "fixed" or not fixed from trauma.

Yes I see it

Izzy

[Ami]

Dear Steve,
  I had an accupuncture treatment on- a point right near the belly button( Stomach 36). ' What happened to me was that for 3 days, I was very centered .I was at "home" in myself. I felt very whole and flowed easily within myself.I felt big--- as though I filled up all my space. Outside was smaller and more "insignificant" than me. I was strong-- in bold relief. However, I flowed like a dancer in my surroundings. It was a very easy and fluid movement. I was operating from my center and I felt a confidence and a peace.
  Are you talking about any of this?                                              Ami

[isittoolate]

How old were you when your belly 36 was punctured, Ami?
Izzy

[steve]

Ami:

Yes Ami, that is a close description of my feeling, but then again we are all unique.

But if you really think about it, you don't need the acupuncture to give you that feeling.

Steve

[Ami]

Dear Steve,
   I think that you are talking about being centered. I know where I want to go- It is the getting there that is more difficult.It is my biggest goal in life--- to feel at home in my own body   Thanks so much, Steve. You are reminding me where I need to go  . I still don't know how you got there unless you just realized it--- all of a sudden or over time. If you have explained this already-- forgive me.                                                      Warmly  Ami

[Ami]

Dear Steve,
     I hope that you keep posting. What you have is what I want. It is there for me-  a little out in the distance,though                                                                                                                                                    I was thinking about another thread . Someone called you "cold". The person was having many ,many relationship problems. I thought that your answer was the answer,but the person was going in the opposite direction of your answer. The person.(no disrespect for the other person at all,please understand this)was trying to be validated from the outside--- not the inside. It simply did not work.
  I have been trying to live life from the outside in. Steve is talking about living life from the inside out. That is the only way that it will work. The other will result in one fall after another b/c it can't be done. It is impossible to make life work that way. It is like going against the way that we were made to function
   I got so, very lost from myself . I used to be like Steve . I used to function and live from my core.It simply is how we are supposed to be before we were interfered with by N's.            Love  Ami

[Iphi]

Yes I wish to be where Steve and Izzy are also.  I'm not!