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DeCluttering: Inspiration, Success Stories, Tips

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sKePTiKal:
Hopsy,

"the community of women"... the mere presence of another is the actual gesture of caring about what you want to accomplish... is enough to release you to do it. Maybe the Shakers were on to something?

Hopalong:
I enjoyed this article today....
Commenters helped, too.

http://unclutterer.com/2011/07/29/ask-unclutterer-how-do-you-move-past-a-fear-of-regret-when-purging-clutter/

hugs
Hops

Meh:
Decluttering I think one must do it regularly because I swear it multiplies like gremlins.

Plus the more poor I am the more I want to hoard because I don't know where the next one is going to come from if ever.

I don't really have a hoarding problem I just notice a change in my behavior/ thinking that I must utilize whatever resource or collect anything that is available to me in CASE I MIGHT need it in the future....when it is no longer available.

I like being organized though it removes some stress. Like when an important piece of paper is needed. How nice it is when it's not sandwiched in a book in a bag inside another bag under the bed.

If I get really stressed out or depressed I can visually see a difference in my environment. Maybe it's because my brain goes temporarily haywire and I can't organize or too much anxiety makes it so I don't concentrate or who knows.

There is a whole mind body spirit aspect to the clutter effect.

I wonder how to you feel about your space/habitation dwelling place in general do you like it?

sKePTiKal:
Hops... bingo!

I didn't read the article, just the title in the link... and all of a sudden "I got it". The struggle hubs has, with letting go his "collections" or stacks of magazines... perhaps some of my mom's issues (though I find myself second-guessing that, on the next breath).... all summed up in the word "regret".

This is a word, whose meaning is almost all emotional and really hard to define, as a consequence. The words that make up the meaning don't do it justice... don't evoke the emotional flavor; the smell and taste of the feeling. A very, very human word, huh? I like to think I don't have any regrets... but that's really just a brave front I put on in the face of some things I lived through, did, was... and can't change now.

Hopalong:
Thanks, Boat and PR...glad this thread can come alive now and then as the issue comes up for folks.

Boat, my dear. Poverty is terrifying and there is nothing at all strange about difficulty letting go of things when you have a realistic apprehension you'll never have the choice again in future to have a useful object. I think when you have barely anything, each thing has more attachment power.

And I get annoyed by "abundance" teaching sometimes, because...it ain't necessarily so. That said, in your shoes I hope you'll keep what delights you. And let it go, and find anew.

One thing I'm very aware of about you is how profoundly you resonate to beauty. So, my belief is that when you do have a space of your own, however modest...it will be lovely. And "beauty visitors" will always flow in and out of your life. You have learned to, or have been forced to, hold them lightly, let them visit rather than anchor. the functional pieces will be sometimes frustratingly absent, but I know you will always have beauty.

PR, absolutely. I believe regret is real and a lovely evocative and useful word. It's emotional honesty, to use it. I think people confuse regret and shame, in this culture. It's like -- oh we're so into driving forward and doing positive thinking, if we admit feeling regret that means at some point we made an ERROR. Or experienced an unfair or unnecessary LOSS of something we loved.

Well, jeez.
Grief is real, but it's not the same as regret.

I think regret is about mistakes, lost possibility...and perhaps about unfairness too, which is a loss of innocence.

We can go all Frank Sinatra and think our regrets are "too few to mention" -- but, sometimes that might be true (I should be paid as well as he, and be a "lounge poet"). More likely, I think recognizing regret is healing...kind of liberates you, after you've accepted the feeling...to let it go and move into the future.

Wordy to not much purpose, but clutter and stuff, letting them go is like letting go of regret.

(Her article was about not being able to let go of stuff because of the FEAR of feeling regret in the first place. Maybe she has shame or deep unprocessed grief attached to the stuff. Regret is not as painful as those two.)

Either way, feeling it, is what releases it. Avoidance (my major) don't help.

BTW, my friend and I are still swapping moral-support time. What a magnificent discovery. I am so grateful for finding someone with the same need... when I was at her place last weekend, she found her will. I was a little startled to recognize she's even more disorganized about paperwork than I am. (I think because she has money, it's less panic-producing for her...but it still makes her unhappy. So I'm excited I can help her back.)

Tomorrow, two Amazons from my church come to pick up some furniture from my house, to haul it off to the big church yard sale. I am excited about that too!

Boat -- want to describe a thing or two, that have come into your life, and that you want to release? (No worries if not.)

PR -- you're the decluttered one with the functioning aesthetic, and Hubby is the packrat. That's hard. Any "thing" that's weighing on you?

love,
Hops

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