Question about goals, planning for the future~~~

[isittoolate]

hi all

I never had any aspirations, no goals, no planning for the future---not to speak of, except when little, to own a candy store.

I would like to know at what age, roughly, any of you knew enough about who you were that you had a goal, whether, school, or a business, only marriage/family, a vocation or whatever.

--and also, where did this/these desires come from?  Yourself? or someone else?

My daughter had quite an interest in Sci=Fi movies and wanted to be an astronaut.  She entered University in the Sciences with this goal in mind, after finishing Grade 13 with honours! (Then she met the N and everything fell apart.)

That is the idea I mean! (without the italics.)

Thanks
Izzy

[Hopalong]

Izzy,
I think a lot of those questions can be answered by the subconscious, if you trust it. The Wisdom of Your Subconscious Mind by Williams... (somebody whack me).

I think the book, The Artist's Way, would be a wonderful wonderful thing for you.

(Sorry, nagging librarian gene.)

hugs,
Hops

[isittoolate]

Hi Hops

You aren't answering my question unless it was your subconscious that led you to where you went.

Izzy

[Lupita]

Dear Izzi, when I was 5 yo, I used to dream to be a ballet dancer. At 11 a famous pianist. At 15 gymnastic athelete. At 22 a science researcher. Now I dream to be a psychiatrist.  All my life dreamt with a prince that would come to rescue me from my loneliness and take care of my emtional needs forever. Then I only dream to find a nice man that is a good person with a regular IQ and some source of income. Now, I only dream to find peace in my heart. Not much. Crazy, ha?  After all, dreaming does not cost a penny.

[gratitude28]

Well, Izzy,
For however much longer I end up on this earth, I want to be a pinter, photographer, linguist, teacher, diver/explorer of oceans, Marine Biologist... hmmm, I know there are a few more.
I have also worked as an editor, translator, teacher, beer wench at a bowling alley (that was fun), personal assistant, the list goes on...
I don't think I will ever be able to settle into one thing. I think I am OK with this now.
What are you mulling over now????
Love, Beth

[isittoolate]

Thank you Lupita and Beth

My goodness! I never had such dreams--- what happened to me?---to live just 'one day at a time' from when quite young--with no goals or aspirations---pathetic!

I still don't have a name for anything I am doing now--trying to figure out at what points I might have been cheated out of  thinking for myself?  plus other things.

Love
Izzy

EDIT:
I meant to say that, when young, like 3-4. my only interest was piano. I fiddled away and finally learned notes and chords and now all these years later I just play by ear. I write lyrics and melodies for songs, as I found it the only way to express my feelings--good old Country from the '50s, but just a hobby.

[gratitude28]

Yes, but had I lived one day at a time, maybe I wouldn't have become a drunk
Love, Beth

[isittoolate]

Oh, Beth,

I am sorry!!!

I just posted an Edit to the one above yours, about my music.

Sometimes the pain is just too much and people have needed to numb it with alcohol. I now understand my Joe, who killed himself... and many others in my life.

I have been there, somewhat, but there has to be a 'special' description for my pattern. ....once a week or once a month---? and I don't know the trigger!

Sometimes it is the same thing as ordering a pizza, and telling myself I am having my own party!
xxoo
Izzy

[gratitude28]

Some days it's almost like we are having a conversation on here

Don't be sorry, Iz. I am glad I was an alcoholic. Without it, I wouldn't have become a better person. Some hardheads need a kick in the pants and that was mine.

Love, Beth

[Lupita]

Do you want to improve your abilities to write music? Can you take piano lessons? Composition lessons? Harmony lessons? Many courses are for free for disable students. Go to the community college. They sure have many courses that you can take. Exploring music is the most exciting adventure you can find. I play the piano. Love it!!!!! You will be amazed how much they can do with you. My son plays beautiful. You never know. You might be able to create a CD all of us will buy. At the university they have recording studious, they help you put your album together after you have taken several years of classes with them. It would be a wonderful adventure. Please, try it.