Author Topic: What the Heck is wrong with me?  (Read 5070 times)

Hopalong

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Re: What the Heck is wrong with me?
« Reply #30 on: July 11, 2007, 05:01:26 PM »
Bean,
What an empathic, skilled, constructive post you wrote...it was "empathic engineering".  :)

TT, staggering. It's like seeing someone give a hungry person a certificate good for a year of free groceries, instead of dinner.

Brigid, so good to hear your voice again.

MO4, I'm so glad you're here...your posts and everyone's responses remind me again what a miraculous gift Dr. G made possible, and we all renew.

Wow.
Hops
"That'll do, pig, that'll do."

isittoolate

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Re: What the Heck is wrong with me?
« Reply #31 on: July 11, 2007, 06:09:13 PM »
Wow!
I would blow up if I put all that in my tummy!

I just had dinner, 2 pork chops cooked with onions tomatoes, cucumber and garlic.  I had my salad last night and my potatoes the night before. Takes me 3 nights to have a meal LOL

But Pizza! Well don't get me started--there's never any left over for the next day!

Oh no Izzy, lol.  You're doing it all wrong.  I take a bite with EVERYTHING at once,  lol.  You're one of those people who eats only one thing on their plate at a time? 

Bean.... I wanted to add that our friends feed us, along with accept us for who we are.  Nice post. 


I cook and eat one PER DAY--I think you missed that--I never make a full dinner of meat potatoes and vegetables, all at once... too much!

Izzy

motheroffour

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Re: What the Heck is wrong with me?
« Reply #32 on: July 12, 2007, 10:53:17 AM »
When I started this thread, I think that maybe what I really wanted to say was, " I am loveable. Why doesn't anybody love me?  There must be someting wrong with me..."   Everyday I read an entry from my book, "The language of letting go", by Melody Beattie.  It is a recovery book giving one healing idea to read everyday of the year.  I read it randomly and look for headings that fit what I feel that day.  Today I read this.  Thought it was valuable.......

We Are Loveable

Even if the most important person in you world rejects you, you are still real, and you are still okay.

Do you ever find yourself thinking:  How could anyone possibly love me?  For many of us, this a deeply ingrained belief that can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.  Thinking we are unloveable can sabotage our relationships with co-workers, friends, family members, and other loved ones. This belief can cause us to choose, or stay in, relationships that are less than we deserve because we don't believe we deserve better.  We may become desperate and cling as if a particular person was our last chance at love.  We may become defensive and push people away.  We may withdraw or  constantly overreact. 

While growing up, many of us did not receive the unconditional love we deserved.  Many of us were abandoned or neglected by important people in our life.  We may have concluded that the reason we weren't loved was because we were unloveable.  Blaming ourselves is an understandable reaction, but an inappropriate one.  If others couldn't love us, or love us in ways that worked, that is not our fault.  In recovery, we're learning to separate ourselves from the behavior of others.  And we're learning to take responsibility for our healing, regardless of the people  around us.
Just as we may have believed that we're unloveable, we can become skilled at practicing the belief that we are loveable.  This new belief will improve the quality of our relationships.  It will improve our most important relationship:  our relationship with ourself.  We will be able to let others love us and become open to the love and friendship we deserve.

Today, God, help me be aware of and release any self-defeating beliefs I have about being lovable.  Help me practice this belief until it gets into my core and manifests itself in my relationships.


This helped me refocus my pain.  I like the part about separating from the actions of others.  As for today, I want to change worrying about what is wrong with me.  And acknowledging that I am loveable and deserve the best kind of love.....gonna practice this one today.

-mof4