Thank you dear friends, for all your help. The visit is almost over. They leave on Wednesdya. I can say that we have had a very nice time. Beer, jokes, beach, dancing, laughing. Exactly what I like to do. When that happenes, I do not mind to sleep on the floor.
I still have something to discuss with you if you please want to help some more.
I have noticed that my mother, my sister in low, my aunt G, and I do not know who else in my family, like to talk about ugly things to me. Only to me. Only in private. If somebody else appears in the picture suddenly, they change subject and talk very nicely, funny, but when alone again, they go back to complains, negativity, etc. My sister in low complains about my brother, despite the fact that I have told her that he is my brother, that I have problems with him too, and that it hurts. My mother does about me, how bad I am, how I mistreat her, and my aunt goes about my grand mother, how she dares to bring me all the time when she came to visit her, instead of not bringing other children, so she can devote all her time to play with my aunt's children. It seemed like these people spotted me as the victim and they revictimized the victim by abusing me too. There I am, listenign to all their crap.
Last night, my son and my niece went to the movies, but after all day at the beach, my sister in low and I were very tired. So, here we are, alone again, there she starts, your brother here and your brother there. So I said, why is that you always choose me to talk about negative things, and if somebody comes you change to a nice conversation? What do you talk about with your sisters? with your mother? Then she said, I do not talk about this with my mother. She cries too much. So, then I am the lucky one. Why dont you go to the psychiatrists? Are you afraid he will tell you to separate? I have been alone ofr 17 years. I dont put up with those kind of things. Then she said, OK let us change the subject. Then she started talking nicely. I guess, my boundaries are easy with her. She did not put a fight. Is it flip flop? hypocresy? politeness? honest good person? I do not know, and I will never know. I only know that I had fun with her and she probably will not be able to come back in a long time.
