Emotional Boundaries & Empathy

[Tweety]

Step 1 was - Recognizing that heap as separate from my husband and separate from me. It is not him and does not determine his value;
it is not me and does not determine my value; it is an inanimate pile of soiled laundry which has no power to overtake me. Don't laugh now, this is for real...  ... that's how much power I'd given to other things/people/circumstances to determine my own wellbeing as well as to gauge the feelings of others toward me. ack.

Hope,
I'm not laughing, that's exactly what I used to do. Determining my wellbeing. I gave them power also. Thank you for having the honesty to say it out loud.
Love, Tweety

[Hopalong]

Aww, Hope.
You are very clear about a kind of confusion that fills so many women's heads with mud.
I'm not laughing at you. There are so many people who never rise out of the anxiety to see what it's about.
You have and good for you.
I think those kinds of insights are very hard won.

(But I do have a few ideas for rituals with a heap of manclothes, just dignified things like putting them on the LR carpet and having a germ-warrior dance around them, plenty of whooping, incantations to the Goddess of Cleanliness--aka June Cleaver--...inviting all the family to join, of course...) 

love
Hops

[Certain Hope]

LOL... Hops, he-man over here would enjoy that!  lol... I'll tell him of your recommendation    He's a character... of the best variety!

((((((((Hops))))))))   lol  thanks... I needed that!!


And (((((((((Tweety)))))))... oh dear, I've given more power to inanimate and animate objects alike... too numerous to mention, from dusty artifacts, to old lettuce in the veggie drawer, to smelly pets... ridiculous; just utterly ridiculous. No wonder I was swept into lala land with N and his "don't worry, be happy".

Thank you both for not laughing at me!

Love,
Hope