Resilience

[WRITE]

a few weeks ago I said i wanted to be more resilient, I wasn't quite sure what I meant but I equated it to my core strength at the gym!

Last night I got home and watched a comedy programme and wrote in my journal and ate some yoghurt with Kashi Lean Crunchy and I felt just so normal- not madly happy, not sad, just like a person who had a busy day and was now taking time out at the end to wind down before bed.

I though about my week and its challenges- again, and how they aren't throwing me off-balance.

So I  guess I am finding this resilience and what it means to me so far is

having the resources to cope even with the unexpected and the difficult;
taking care of myself even when I'm not entirely motivated to;
doing what is meaningful to me with my life, regardless of social or other external pressures to conform to something else;
engaging in relationships with people who share some of my values and interests;
not being afraid to care;
disengaging with relationships I don't have to* do which are too demanding.

So I am getting to articulate who i am and what I want and what my resources and limitations are.

This week threatened to undermine my developing confidence- y'all haven't heard me mention going back to college for a few days?!
But I think it will just show me that sometimes life is trying and I can cope even when it is.

~W


* pre-teen son is a 'have to do' relationship she reminds herself.... 

[Ami]

Dear WRITE,
  I am happy that you are defining yourself in a way that works for you.That must be part of what 'maturity" is. I am a "work in progress", I think.                           Love     Ami

[WRITE]

Thanks Ami, I don't know about maturity, but I do know- I've bounced back many times now, enough times to see that's who I am and to reassure me: I can do this!

In my moments of self-doubt I need to remind myself firmly.

Hope everyone is okay, love and goodnight

~W

[Bella_French]

I can relate WRITE; for a few years there,  I grew so used to the anxiety and depressions, I forgot what it was like to feel a sense of `stable' happiness for any length of time. I still get knocked around every month at PMS time (it is the end of the world then), but there are days when i realise that I am actually quite happy.

Congratulations on your new found resilience! That is such a nice thing to have. I'm glad that your mental outlook and the gym are helping.

X bella

[WRITE]

It's very difficult to be stable for someone with Bipolar 1, it's an added complication to all that's happened.

But I am getting to a place where I see: oh that's the illness talking......and especially a place where I take care of myself no matter what happens.

I'm not tying myself in emotional knots like I was.

Sorting out the money this week has shown me something- some of the decisions I have to make aren't going to be ideal. I'll just have to accept them and move on and do my best.

Son goes back to school next week- can't wait! Then I get my space back to work during the day without rushing around and worrying about him.

That was another scenario which wasn't ideal....but it worked out okay.

[Gaining Strength]

Resilience.  That is a word that I would definitely associate with you WRITE.  I love seeing you claim that word for yourself.

You are certainly resilient.  I so admire your resiliency.  You have been through so much and each time you dig deep and find the where-withall to find the strength to face another tough spate.  I am growing to be like you.  I am becoming resilient like you.  I do so admire you.  Thanks for sharing your struggles and your triumphs.

your friend - Gaining Strength

[Starfish]

I am not sure what the average age is in here..but does anyone remember the Christmas Cartoon "Santa Claus is coming to Town"? One of the characters is having a really hard time and he starts singing this song...
"   
      

Song Lyrics
Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you値l be walking cross the floor
Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you値l be walking out the door

You never will get where you池e going
If you never get up on your feet
Come on, there痴 a good tail wind blowing
A fast walking man is hard to beat

Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you値l be walking cross the floor
Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you値l be walking out the door

If you want to change your direction
If your time of life is at hand
Well don稚 be the rule be the exception
A good way to start is to stand

Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you値l be walking cross the floor
Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you値l be walking out the door

If I want to change the reflection
I see in the mirror each morn
You mean that it's just my election
To vote for a chance to be reborn"

[WRITE]

I knew I would have to dip into savings in order to live out the lifestyle choices I have made for the short term, but knowing it didnt prepare me for the emotions that came with doing it.  

oh CB, the feelings I had when I had to use my savings for those car repair bills....my little cushion gone.

Funny, I closed the account this week and there was $200 + in there I had forgotten about, that was nice. But closing the account was good- it meant me not trying to save or think I can save for a while, because I can't.

You are very kind GS, you have been inspiration in so much of this, you've had it much harder than me financially and still keep going.
How's the house doing?
Wish I was close enough to come lend a hand! It's so much fun to do each other's chores together, I almost want to start a 'chore club'!

I don't remember the cartoon, thanks Starfish, love the last two lines though. 'Elect to be reborn....'
That's a Christian metaphor ( one which has been spoiled in some churches ) too.

~W

[Hopalong]

A Chore Club.

Write that is an absolutely brilliant idea.

For the longest time I have wanted to start some form of labor-swap-and-share at my church.
Just one-on-one--when people have chores or tasks they find especially tedious, that they
could jot them on a list, and find a match...and each just trade a couple hours to work together.

Simple, healing...like family functioning for those who live alone.

Thanks for saying that.
love
Hops

[WRITE]

recently a very organised friend came over and helped me sort my spare room, it was amazing how easily we accomplished order and becasue of how she arranged things it's been easy to keep it like that too.

I am finding that having specific places for specific clutter works really well- you know the stuff you can't throw away but can't easily sort either; those big plastic bins work perfectly.

A chore club gives people support and companionship to do unwelcome tasks, as well as sharing energy and ideas.

Start one Hops!