Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board
Mother's Day - a day of dread and self loathing.
mrt:
My wife took me to the dentist this week because I had taken some pain pills to try to relieve the pain of my toothache and was in no condition to drive.
After she dropped me off at home - she returned to work. She's manages a law firm and is a legal secretary - basically a lawyer without the degree. Well she had to stay late to help this guy with a divorce. No big deal in her line of work.
I was at work telling a co-worker about my brother-in-laws fiance attempting suicide when another co-worker told me that her husband had to cover for someone because this person's relative had shot himself in the head and that he died.
Come to find out it was the guy that my wife helped with his divorce!
I woke up yesterday Thursday mad as a hornet. My wife was upset with me because I was mad at her. I didn't know why I was even mad at her - I should have been there for her as she was hurting but I just brushed her off and wanted to be left alone. I guess I was mad because of the drama that I get dragged into with her brother and her occupation.
At my job, I assist people with computer/network problems. I basically help people. But with her job - they can do some major damage to people's lives . I told her that I help people and that they kill people.
I know that was bad of me to say - but that's what I felt at the time. Now she's really pissed at me for saying that.
I'm at a loss for how to feel or what to say. I know I should be supportive, I know I shouldn't have been upset with her but I was. We have just gotten through all the junk with my N family and was beginning to have some so - called peace. Now she's says I'm behaving just like my N family does. (She knows that torques me to no end - pushing those buttons like women do so well! :wink: ). That I bail emotionally whenever things get tough. I don't feel like I'm bailing but I would like a little less chaos in my life. No more suicides - please.
Ladies out there. Am I being a jerk? What should I do/say? Be brave - you won't hurt my feelings any. Tell me like it is - set me straight. I need some insight.
mrt
mrt:
--- Quote from: Dawning ---....we all meet in the Cook Islands and rent a villa.
--- End quote ---
Dear Dawning,
Where do I sign up? Although I'm really petrified to doing anything this week - This week has been so much fun I can hardly stand it. :wink:
--- Quote ---
Are you are reader? I've got to recommend it again: Healing The Child Within by Charles L. Whitfield.
--- End quote ---
Okay Dawning, I'm taking your advice and am watching 3 copies on Ebay as we speak. (I'm an Ebay junkie :roll: )
Thanks for all your input.
mrt
mrt:
Dear Dawning,
I went ahead and bought a copy of Healing The Child Within via "Buy It Now" off of Ebay.
Looking forward to reading it.
mrt
Wildflower:
Hi mrt,
Yuck. What a horrible couple of weeks you've been having!!! :cry: :cry:
Dealing with your mother, a suicide attempt in the family on an already very stressful day for you, and now, another suicide close to home? Of course you're stressed! And I can see how you'd want to shove all this stuff away - even if it means taking it out on your wife's profession. But it isn't about that, is it? Your wife's profession? It's about all this drama that doesn't seem to let up - and a really bad bit of it right now.
You're not a jerk for saying what you did. You're having a rough time. But I bet you'd feel better if things were okay between you and your wife - instead of it being yet another drama. Have you talked to her about how stressed you are? Can you guys take a weekend together? Get away from all the noise in some bed-and-breakfast somewhere?
(((hugs)))
Wildflower
mrt:
Dear Wildflower,
Thanks for your kind words,
--- Quote --- Can you guys take a weekend together? Get away from all the noise in some bed-and-breakfast somewhere?
--- End quote ---
Oh that sounds like such a good idea. That has been going through our minds too. To get away. But we are too petrified to move - afraid of what's going to happen next! A cloud hanging over us of doom and gloom. :shock:
Next week's our 16th anniversary. I'm gonna try. :)
mrt
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