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JD:

Hello to all...I am new here and just wanted to say hi. I don't even know if I or my husband is N or not...I'm not sure I understand the term; but I do know that I have had some emotional problems since I was a small child.
I was always extremely shy, afraid to make friends, therefore I only had one or two at any given time (always happy & relieved that I didn't have to work at it any more than that!)  :roll:
I guess I got better as I grew up, altho' I still don't like new situations...I like to stay home most of the time with my family. My parents never really understood what I was all about, and my sisters & brothers were always just like them...I always felt like the oddball...
I just posted this today I guess to say hello to all of you and to say that even with my husband, who loves me & I love him, I still don't feel like I am being heard...that I can't speak up & give opinions without being criticized, etc....

Anonymous:
Hi, JD and welcome.

Can I just quickly ask a couple of questions regarding this comment of yours to maybe get the ball rolling here,

[quote="JDthat I can't speak up & give opinions without being criticized, etc....[/quote]

1) Who does the criticising etc...?

2) Are you saying absolutely everyone does this, including your husband?

3) Do you listen to their criticisms?

4) Has this caused you to stop speaking up and giving your opinions, or do you still speak up and give your opinions?

CG

Anonymous:
Hello CG...
In answer to your questions here...my husband is the one doing the criticising, no one else does...I try to take in everything he says, but alot of the time it's about things that are long since past, like "what I said or did a long time ago, or what a member of my family said or did"... :(
He'll be fine most of the time (and don't get me wrong here~I love him very much & I know how much he loves me)~but then all of a sudden his mood changes & he'll get depressed about money or whatever...  :evil:
Like yesterday, for example...I was awake when he got up for work (about 3 a.m.) & he was in his usual good mood & he asked me what my plans were for the day. I told him I was home til about 2, then I was going to see my Mom, who is in a home right now, and then about 4 I had to go pick up two of our daughters from school...then it's home til 5:30, then taking them to their evening classes. He left feeling fine, but then after I came home @ 4:30 my other daughter told me he was in a bad mood cuz I hadn't had dinner started yet! He never complained to me about it, but another of our girls told me the same thing later on... :roll:
I can't predict his moods alot of the time, and sometimes I feel like I'm walking on eggshells to please him & keep him happy.
We have eight children, from 15-25 years of age, and we've been married for nearly 27 years. Most of it has been really good, except when he gets in one of his moods; he told me once that he thinks sometimes the kids are afraid of him, and I told him that sometimes I am too~that seemed to knock the wind out of him for a bit~I don't think he ever suspected it!
Like I said before, I don't really know what the problem is here...I just know I need to vent somewhere where no one knows me...
O yeah...I forgot to tell you that in answer to your question about my opinions, I can't always tell him what I think or feel about some things cuz he'll just get louder or sulk like a 3-year-old...why are men like this?? :cry:

JD:
by the way... :) this previous post was really me...I just forgot to sign in, so it'll say "Guest"! but it's me...
I also would like to add here, that ever since I was little I have mostly kept my opinions to myself, unless they were something I really felt safe sharing, but whenever the other kids wanted to play a certain game, or whatever the issue, I usually went along even if it's not what I wanted to do at the time, just to keep them happy...it didn't matter.

Learning:
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