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Perfect Families

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lynn:
Karin,

thanks for sharing your story.  Your wisdom and experiences are an inspiration to me.  You are a gifted writer and communicator.


--- Quote from: Karin ---He tells our two daughters that he wants to be ‘fair’. He’s still ‘fond’ of me and hopes that we will be friends in the future once the divorce is over. He’s squeaky clean. Just like the perfect Dad on ‘My Three Sons’. Nice, moral, honest, loving.

--- End quote ---


It is extraordinary the life, the "story," that your xNH lives.  What energy it must take to constantly shift reality to meet your ideal life story.  How "fortunate" for him that he is a "perfect" person!!  :lol:

And more importantly, what energy it took you and your kids when you were trying to shift to fit in with his fantasy.  "Perfect" is not all it's cracked up to be.

  I am proud of you for putting your feet on true ground.  For supporting the emotional needs of your kids.  For having the strength to hang in there for a very long time.  I am proud of you for saying "no" to the tapes that must play in your head.... you can't be married for that many years and not continue to hear his voice in some way....  

You are an inspiration and a friend to me.  Thank you for sharing your challenges and your successes.  You give me hope that one can be entangled with an N for many years.... and come out free.  With abilities.  Opinions.  A voice.

Warmly,

lynn

Anonymous:
Thanks Less, the pain has eased a lot since I wrote that. I enjoy writing but it's been a bit of a love/hate struggle because my N mother is/was a writer and of-course, I could never, ever be as good as her!

Hi Lynn, thanks for your lovely words. I often think of you and hope you're OK. I remember feeling like I just wanted to be alone, curled up somewhere for quite a while and that's what I allowed myself to do. I hope you're doing what you need to do for yourself.
You should be proud of yourself too, you did no less than what I did and that was to take back your own life, for yourself and your kids.

Karin:
That was me there above, got booted off!
Karin

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