consideration and respect is always appreciated when offered

[Leah]

consideration and respect is always appreciated ...... when offered 

[Certain Hope]

Dear Leah,

I think that what you've expressed here are very genuine human needs and quite valid human expectations.
In my own life, I've found that Christ Jesus is the only One who consistently and honorably meets those expectations.

Just recently, I was struck afresh with the impact of the fact that... I've spent the majority of my life listening to other peoples' struggles and  issues and trying to respond helpfully to them. When you're the one who is always asking other people how they're doing, I guess they take it for granted that you're just fine! I don't even resent that... only acknowledge it as a reality. On the other hand, I will no longer expose my heart to page after page/hour after hour/day after day of other peoples' struggles and issues, lest the work which I need to do within myself be dampened in the process.

Reading your posts and noting your approach here on the board has been very revealing to me. Thank you for that! I also want to be heard and not dismissed or treated lightly. There are many voices which quite easily overrun my own... and that, regularly... but I am beginning to learn ways and means of nipping that in the bud!

With love,
Carolyn

[Hopalong]

Hi dear Carolyn,

I will no longer expose my heart to page after page/hour after hour/day after day of other peoples' struggles and issues, lest the work which I need to do within myself be dampened in the process.

This sounds like healthy boundary-setting to me. Thank you.

Do you mean you stop reading, skip threads, choose not to post, or a combination?

I think I'm dependent here.

love
Hops

[Leah]

Dear Carolyn,

Hear what you are saying my dear precious soul.

I really do appreciate     (not necessarily need as it is something that is offered by choice) Consideration and Respect

and also, I really do appreciate being able to freely live my life, with a voice, in Consideration and Respect.

Love, Leah


PS   This thread was just an idea after a posting on a thread by a member who made a suggestion to me.   This was the only idea

that I could come up with.   Basic things that we appreciate    ( when it is offered / presented to us )

That's all.


And, as I mentioned in the post, if it is not something that is * seen * as profitable for the community,

then I am more than happy to delete the topic. 

[Certain Hope]

Hi dear Carolyn,

I will no longer expose my heart to page after page/hour after hour/day after day of other peoples' struggles and issues, lest the work which I need to do within myself be dampened in the process.

This sounds like healthy boundary-setting to me. Thank you.

Do you mean you stop reading, skip threads, choose not to post, or a combination?

I think I'm dependent here.

love
Hops

Dear Hops,

It's a combination of the above, really... some posters I have chosen not to read at all, because I do not like the way I feel afterwards.
For me, it's like choosing not to take an abusive phone call. I used to think that I had to face every single speck of nastiness in this world and overcome it... as though - if my life were not supremely difficult, then I'd be a failure.  Somehow, along the path of this past year or so, I gave up trying to be all things to all people. In accord with that, I don't try to meet and greet each newcomer or offer support to every suffering soul. I am not a bit callous... which is really the problem. It was tearing me apart to read of all the horror.
And you know... I've read many times here of how much that hurts folks - when others won't/can't relate to them, because they don't want to face the pain. Well, I can meet some people where they are and make myself available to help them shoulder their burdens, but not everyone! If I could do that for everyone, then I'd be Jesus. That's what I saw.

Hopsy, I was very dependent here. I so very much wanted people to like/value/need( ?)/appreciate/recognize me. When I posted, it was as Leah said... with all of my heart and emotions fully involved, a total outpouring of myself. And uhen the well ran dry. There simply was not enough input to maintain that level of giving and sharing... mostly because I was not looking in the right place for the filling... I needed to look to Christ alone.

You have been such a great friend to me, dear Hops... truly, you, and Sela, and Finding Peace, and a few others here have taught me how to love, despite vast differences. In real life, I have no one like that... but you've given me the tools to recognize/forge such a relationship, and I'm so thankful! I wish that I could give a corresponding gift to y'all...

I can only say that I've watched you grow and bloom here and continue to learn from your willingness (and eagerness!) to live and to let live.

With much love,
Carolyn

((((((((((Leah))))))))) thank you!

[Leah]

Reading your posts and noting your approach here on the board has been very revealing to me. Thank you for that! I also want to be heard and not dismissed or treated lightly. There are many voices which quite easily overrun my own... and that, regularly... but I am beginning to learn ways and means of nipping that in the bud!

Dear Carolyn,

So truly glad to * hear * that you are honing your voice!

Much love to you,

Leah

[Hopalong]

Thank you, Carolyn.
You have always given me (((((Hope)))).
Thanks for your sanity and adult example.

xxoo
Hops

Thank you Leah, for literally saving people.
I am so glad in your adulthood you have countered your parents'
viciousness by helping others escape it. What a triumph.
xo
Hops

[finding peace]

Thank you Dear Carolyn, thank you.  Your words mean a lot to me.

You said:

You have been such a great friend to me, dear Hops... truly, you, and Sela, and Finding Peace, and a few others here have taught me how to love, despite vast differences. In real life, I have no one like that... but you've given me the tools to recognize/forge such a relationship, and I'm so thankful! I wish that I could give a corresponding gift to y'all...

You already have. 

Through your posting here, I have been able to put so many pieces of the puzzle of myself back in place.  I can't find the words to express how much more at peace today I am than I was just a year ago, and you have been instrumental in helping me find that peace.

Thank you.   

((((((((((Carolyn))))))))))))

[Leah]

Appreciated ((( Hops )))

Just came on the thread to delete it
as I was concerned it may seem boastful,
which it truly isn't -- more relief, I feel, think.

May that dear lady enjoy many years
to come filled with peaceful thoughts.

Love, Leah