Try to sell the business

[Overcomer]

My mom and aunt and bookkeeper went to a convention.  I stayed home because of children obligations.  went looking for super glue and found a letter from a company who helps sell businesses.  This made me feel a couple different things.  1 She cannot sell because it is not worth anything.  2  It is just like her to sell rather than back off and let me run the thing.  3  Good.  My new business will go and I would be leaving anyway.  But I cannot help getting angry.  Just something about it.

[Ami]

((((((((Kelly)))))))))))
You are such a beautiful person ,who is so, not appreciated, IMO.               Ami

[alone48]

Sometimes it feels like a sock in the gut when you find out someone is acting behind your back. You had a plan and things will be ok, but why couldn't it have been in the open? I'm so sorry, but keep on making your plans and succeed!

[Overcomer]

Well it is not the first time she has threatened to sell  the business.  I blow up and tell her to retire-I yell that I can no longer work with her and rather than just bowing out and giving me a chance she tries to sell the business.  I do not know if she is doing it to spite me but whatever it is it just proves to me that she will NEVER validate me so I have to try to validate myself.

[Certain Hope]

Dear Kelly,

Something like that might make me scared enough to try to return to old habits of buttering her up and seeking to gain her approval... 
just because it can be so hard to let go of what's familiar.

It's also very difficult to be reminded, in the midst of trying to regain your balance, that someone else can pull the rug out from under you whenever she feels so inclined.

((((((((Kelly))))))))  she can't really do that, though, you know? She doesn't own the rug.

Love to you,
Carolyn

[Leah]

Must surely have been a shock (((( Kelly ))))

However, remember, all things work to the good, and they can you know, honestly.

Maybe, just maybe, now is the time for you,

to be your own woman, of liberty, an authentic woman,

and also, as a business woman of integrity.

Very best wishes for you, and for your future.

Love, Leah

[Hopalong]

Oh Kelly.
I'm sorry.

I can so relate to the shock of knowing nothing is secure in an Nfamily. And the behind the back stuff.

Please take nothing for granted. And I think you are so right when you say you may as well learn to validate yourself.

You do know by now that she is not capable of validating you in the way that you crave. She is not capable. So all your upset and fury just chews away at YOU.

love
Hops

[Overcomer]

It just makes me mad because she just will not give me a chance to succeed OR fail!  I have had her control so much of my life that I just cannot handle it.  My business WILL be successful just because I Have to be free from her.  Failure is not an option.  I kinda understand why she does not give me a chance.  When I am around her I truly AM manic or borderline.  She brings the worse out in me.

[Certain Hope]

Dear Kelly,

I'm not sure, but just in case I'm hearing what I think I'm hearing and you really are beginning to blame yourself for your mother's shameless mistreatment of you in taking you for granted... please do stop that, for your own sake.

Her little merry-go-round can keep right on spinning willy-nilly till the cows come home and it matters not...
you don't have to be on board. Stepping off could get messy, but it's well worth the gain!

Love to you, and hugs,
Carolyn

[Overcomer]

Thanks for that vote of confidence.  I just think I understand her skewed perception.  She labels me as unstable and then in my rage and anger I act unstable.  She calls me bipolar and someone here tells me my reactions to her look that way even if they are not.  I play into her hand and the only way to not play is to not play.

[Certain Hope]

Thanks for that vote of confidence.  I just think I understand her skewed perception.  She labels me as unstable and then in my rage and anger I act unstable.  She calls me bipolar and someone here tells me my reactions to her look that way even if they are not.  I play into her hand and the only way to not play is to not play.

(((((Kelly))))) I wish there was some magical fix --- an instant force field, so that all her stuff would just bounce off of you. Hang in there.

Love,
Carolyn

[Ami]

Dear Kelly,
  You are in a very hard situation b/c  you have close connections with her. I still think that if you could "back her down "in some way, with quiet strength , she would be more managable.
  It is "easy" to say.Before, I got my "voice" back, enough to back my M down, I had NO idea how to be strong with her. I would scream and yell.  That was not strength, but weakness ,and she knew it.
  When she saw true strength in me, she backed down, almost effortlessly, as my H did.
   I had struggled for so long to have my own voice,with her,but to NO avail. Then, when I HAD a strength inside, it just happened.
  I still have to back her down, but it is different b/c she listens and  does back down.
  I have to say that it is easier for me b/c she does not live and work with me BUT my guess is that if you were strong,in a quiet and dignified way(not screaming and losing it), she WOULD back down.
  Compost what does not fit, Kelly. I hope that I was not insensitive to  your situation, which is more difficult than mine. What I said was said in love, Kelly.        Ami

[Bella_French]

Kelly, I'd be put out too. Surely selling the business should be discussed with you! I'm sorry you're going through this, and i hope it works out well.

X bella

[Lupita]

Dear Kelly, I wish so much that you get out of your mother's field of action! You have no idea how much it has helped me to be 2000 miles away from my mother.

[Ami]

(((((((((Kelly)))))))))))))))   Just thinking of you, Friend.                     Love, Ami