Yeah that's my house. ....each time I clean up one area another is destroyed until I can't even do the basic of housecleaning.
.....But the house is topsy turvy and it is hard to find a place to start. Plus it touches all my shame buttons. So I have been working on bolstering myself with God's love in order that I might have that fear based shame cast out and move forward.
Dear GS,
I am so fearful of jumping in to your thread for a couple of reasons. First, because I am a newbie and have been away from the board for a couple of weeks because of travel and second, I am at my son's house which means I may be interrupted at any moment and I am afraid to start something I may not be able to finish or make a comment that elicits a response from someone, that I won't be able to read for several days, making it seem like I am rude, obnoxious and unkind for ignoring them. Does that make sense?
Anyway, I just had to jump in here because I have had many of the same "house" issues, and also I have been using EFT for about one month, and was just wondering to myself today, "I wonder if anyone else on the V&ES board does EFT?" I thought it rather a coincidence that you should mention it in your post.... I basically thought it (EFT) seemed weird, silly and useless at first, until I had done it about a week. How wrong I was! I got my information from a different website than yours, but it must be the same thing, the tapping and using verbal affirmations, right? I cannot tell you how much emotional sludge has been dredged up and out, since using it. I cannot comprehend why it is working? I have not been using it while on my trip and have noticed I am gradually slipping into old, unhealthy behavioral responses with my dil and son (fear of rejection, and approval-seeking behaviors, to name a couple), so took the time to do it this morning; it really helped me refocus! I would be interested in hearing more about your experiences with EFT (and anyone else's for that matter).
On the subject of your house, may I relate a few personal observations? I have long felt that God has used the physical state of my house as an object lesson to mirror the condition of my spiritual house. For example, when we first moved in years ago, the exterior of the house looked really nice and neat, but inside, everything needed complete renovation. I spent all my time and energy maintaining the outside because I didn't have the funds, time or energy to redo the inside and I felt the outside was what people saw and what mattered. I realized as time went by that the renovations done inside were often done cheaply and with inferior materials and did not last, like we did not really deal with the root problems properly, just plastered something cheap on top of growing problems, like the cheapest carpet, cheap paint, etc., "solutions" that were doomed to failure from the start. Finally last year we were forced to spend some really big money on some problems that were threatening the actual structure of the house! We have been gradually learning that only doing each job thoroughly and properly, with professional workers and good materials, will give the needed results desired! So analogous to my spiritual house! God seems to want me to allow Him the time and access to really renovate and properly repair my spiritual house, which was in absolute ruins, although I looked pretty good "from the curb."
Another thing I think He has been trying to teach me is that this earth is not truly my home and I am not going to find heaven here, just one huge mountain to climb, with the occasional opportunity to sit, rest and look down to see how far I have come. I think He wants me to finally realize that my rest, peace, perfection, acceptance, and everything else I have been searching for are found absolutely and completely in Him, and Him alone.
May you find peace and be encouraged, dear GS! Also, hello to everyone! Violet
PS, If I have failed to respond to anyone on this board and have made her or him feel slighted, I humbly apologize and wish it known that I would not intentionally ignore or slight anyone here. I find it difficult to keep track of all the threads and info on this board, I don't know how you all do keep track....
