Hi Hops,
Some answers to your questions!
How's your wife?Very well. Her scans (two years) have all shown no sign of relapse. For lung cancer, oncologists like to see three years of clean scans. So we have a year to go. BTW, you can read her story at:
http://upstagelungcancer.org/ How are YOU?Ah, perhaps the Buddhists are right when they say: “life is suffering” (in my case, a chronic health issue). But the important things in my life: family, patients, and friends are all going well and continue to provide a generous supply of “meaning”, attachment, and a sense of accomplishment. And I live in a very safe and secure world. For those things I am exceptionally lucky.
What's your sense of what the board has been?Ultimately, a place to open up the pain of one’s life, esp. important attachments, and let the pain from those attachments heal in a new and different way. (Of course, the board did not always work this way for all people.) Also, a place to form new healthier attachments with people who understood.
What strengthened it? What weakened it?What strengthened it was member vulnerability, and the capacity (that varied among members) to look at what we do automatically and often unconsciously as a result of our past in order to protect ourselves/survive. What weakened it was when members could not do this—even when they thought they were doing it.
Did belief systems, religious expressions, play any part?Not per se—only to the extent that they affected the above.
Have we accomplished anything remarkable here?Oh, I think so. But, of course, I’m biased. For all of the imperfections: mine, the medium’s, the absence of a “therapist” or central figure, the board had impact. People were helped. But clearly it was not a board for everyone. It could be a rough and tumble place. And some people left hurt. I was saddened every time this happened.
Do you understand how many people you have helped?Probably not. But I tend to underestimate such things. It has always been wonderful, though, to hear from people—sometimes years later—about how the board helped.
Do you know how REAL that help has been?That’s a very interesting question, Hops. With my patients, I receive consistent, clear (and gratifying) evidence. On the board often I have to read between the lines. In part, I've had to rely on faith.
Would you do it again?Absolutely! The board—and the people who participated—will always be an important part of my life.
Do we have to stop? What do we do now?I don’t know yet (sorry!!!!). I know this is difficult for some, but I haven’t made a final decision. I'll decide by the beginning of June.
Best wishes,
Richard
