Voicelessness and Emotional Survival > Voicelessness and Emotional Survival Message Board

Family cults and one-on-one cults

(1/3) > >>

flower:
Hi everyone,

Some wonder why we have such problems with denial and breaking away from N's domination and so do I cause I was (still have residual effects) a person with the problem. I am convinced my mom used techniques to gain compliance that are used in cults.

How many of you feel that your Ns had purposeful behavior that is remarkably cultish? Or is this how all of us feel?

I found an article on family cults and one-on-one cults and how compliance is enforced.

I know I have been linking to one site a lot but there is some good stuff there.

This article (actually chapter one excerpts of the following book) is:

Captive Hearts, Captive Minds
Freedom and Recovery from Cults and Abusive Relationships

By Madeleine L. Tobias and Janja Lalich

http://www.rickross.com/reference/brainwashing/brainwashing18.html

Dawning:
flower, thanks for posting that link.  I've never thought about my upbringing as being *cultish* but after reading this information,  I can see the exploitative dynamics certainly were in my family and in some of the people I have erroneously assumed were my *friends* over the years.

Regarding this:

When psychological coercion and manipulative exploitation have been used in a one-on-one cultic relationship, the person leaving such a relationship faces issues similar to those encountered by someone leaving a cultic group.

I'm very interested in knowing what those issues are that are faced by someone leaving a cultic group.  I looked for it at this site but now I'm on the links in the page on brainwashing.

Anonymous:
Hi Dawning,

Thanks for posting the link, I look forward to reading it.  Just wanted to reply that yes! the cult analogy popped into my head when thinking about my brother's situation with his psycho wife.  One has to be fully dedicated to her and her reality in order to not incur her wrath.  Another T had independently instructed my dad to think of my brother as having joined a cult, too!  

Interestingly enough, a relative of mine also joined a cult.  Her brother and sisters have all suffered a lot of emotional abuse in their family...I think her attitude was "just take care of me".  It is sad.  Her sister became a psychologist.

Hugs, Seeker

Anonymous:
Whoops,  :oops:

Sorry Flower, I credited Dawning with starting this post.  (Hi Dawning!  :D )

I need to pay better attention!  Thank you, Flower.  :wink:  Sorry about that!

Peace, Seeker seeking to pay better attention...

Seeker as guest:
Hi Dawning and Flower,

I found another article at this site that was very helpful to me:

Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People
http://www.rickross.com/reference/brainwashing/brainwashing11.html

The parts on shaming and guilt fit my dad to a tee.  Other tactics are used by my Stealth N brother, such as playing the victim, changing the subject, and selective attention.  A slippery jerk.

xo, Seeker

Navigation

[0] Message Index

[#] Next page