...

[Ellie]

...

[satori]

I've had a very similar problem.  very similar.  suffice it to say I empathize heartily with your frustration and pain.  it was really hard for me to attack this problem as well.  but you have to do it!  you're not just protecting your son, you're also protecting your inner child!  this will help you to heal!  it really will!  you're going to feel so empowered when you take of this... not IF, but WHEN, because I know you can!

document, document, document!  save all the emails, the zero paper, and any notes.  if you send further notes yourself, make copies.  then, sit down and draft an email containing all the facts and send it to the school district superintendent!  I know this sounds scary, I thought so too, but it's really not!  superintendents are politically motivated people and they would NEVER say anything mean to ANYONE.  really really.  

the very HOUR I got the superintendent's office involved I began to get support and results.   the teacher and the principal never changed their minds but the superintendent agreed with me and forced a resolution.

trust your instincts.  you are RIGHT.  I know it's scary!  did you know that every time you deal with something like this it gets ten times easier?

one more resource:  your pediatrician.  I told my pediatrician the situation and she wrote a reccommendation that my child was experiencing emotional abuse at the teacher's hands... and the principal ignored it!  but the superintendent sure didn't.  schools are political bodies at the upper level and they SURE don't want lawsuits!

you can do it!!

[Anonymous]

Hi Ellie,
I too had a similar experience with a teacher who I thought had acted unfairly to my daughter (and then was abrasive to me). I wrote to the principle expressing just this and asked that she no longer be in any of his classes in future years. Next thing the principle's on the phone and then the district supervisor rang to find out all the facts. I suspect I wasn't the only one with a complaint against this teacher because he left the school soon after.
Talk to the right people and you'll get somewhere.

[flower]

Hi Ellie,

These kind of situations are the pits! And as for me, after all this N stuff I don't have the energy I used to to fight battles.

My 2 cents if you want input in addition to venting:

 Could it be that the fine print on the cookies said that the cookies were produced in a factory that processes peanuts? A lot of cookies we buy say that. That seems so technical if that is what this teacher is protesting...down to the molecular level. This teacher may have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and is afraid of peanuts. Maybe she wants to ban peanuts from the world. She sounds "nuts".  

 My sister-in-law got children's services involved when her daughter was denied lunch several times by the teacher because her daughter was late to school too many times.

[Ellie]

...

[Anonymous]

Wow, Ellie!

This is so weird!  A few children at our school have chocolate allergies, but kids still bring chocolate to our school.  The more sensitive families will also bring a non-chocolate choice too.  The only thing that came close to this (in the food dept) is an extremely obese teacher not allowing sugar into the classroom.  Really fun parties there, boy.

I am appalled to learn that some schools will deny a child LUNCH as punishment!   That is so basic to health.  What are they thinking?

I have had many battles with a few teachers and yes, there is retaliation to some degree some times.  I think the teaching profession (like a few other professions) can draw people who think that being the only grownup in the room gives them "power-over" the kids.  The really hard core ones will do anything to get you out of their classroom.  It is their territory and we parents are invaders, threats.  It ISN'T PERSONAL.  It's THEIR problem.

I agree with all those above who say principals cave when faced with the L word: lawsuit.  And amazingly, it sometimes takes that to get them to act because they ARE trying to please everyone, including wacko teachers.  

That said, I feel bad for your son, but the "humiliation" of switching classrooms may be a better less painful outcome than dragging out the entire year.  What does he really stand to lose?  Your family certainly can't be the only one that thinks this teacher is wacky.  Everyone may think you are very smart to get out of her class and into another.  Your son is not the problem.  Don't let her define it that way.  I'll bet there are plenty of staff members who are tired of hearing the peanut lecture and eat pb&j in the staff room just to get her goat!  

Perhaps you might feel better if you approached another prospective teacher discreetly and without putting him/her in an awkward position, ask "would there be a problem if a family switched their child into your class at this point in the school year?"  You can be neutral and diplomatic (the teacher may not be "allowed" to say anything) but if s/he asks why, you can simply say the chemistry just isn't working and perhaps your son would benefit from a change.  A change doesn't have to be viewed as a humiliation but can be prudent thing to do.  

Good luck!  Boy, do I feel your pain.     Tell us how it turns out.  Seeker

[Ellie]

...