Wow -
I stop by and check the board every now and then, suprised that this old message is being discussed again. I posted way back in May. Like I said then, I did not write it, and found it rather ironic/cynically amusing, although perhaps with a grain of truth. Some people pointed out the anti-male tone, and I can certainly see their point with regard to certain parts of it. But other statements are perhaps more gender-neutral, and could come from a parent or friend as well as a romantic partner.
Maybe the bottom line is that with N's or other abusive people, what they say can often have a different meaning than what it might seem on the surface, a meaning influenced by their need/desire to control the person with whom they are interacting. I found this idea to be helpful to me in understanding my ex. He claimed that a lot of his behavior - which included having affairs and being verbally/emotionally abusive - as being motivated by a desire to "improve our marriage". This made no sense to me until I began to realize that his idea of a better marriage was not what a normal person would expect. His idea of a better marriage was that he could have action on the side and beat me down so much that I would conform to his wishes without protest.
As for whatever reasons this post was brought back to the top, I really am clueless! Seems like perhaps it spoke to someone new to the board.
have a great day.
